Hello, first time poster, long time lurker.
I'm having some issues with my ex wife and could do with some thoughts on next steps.
I'm 40, and have two kids with my Ex wife, also 40. We were married for around 10 years and the kids are 4 and 3. We separated around 2 years ago and things have always been volatile, sometimes it's been amenable and at others completely apoplectic.
We have a 50/50 split and everything is split down the middle regarding childcare costs, clubs and clothing. This has worked well and the kids are developing nicely despite all the disruption.
Now, i've been seeing a lovely woman for about 15 months, we get on really well and i've recently met her daughter (10) and we have a really great time together as family unit. When we got together we agreed to take things slowly with my kids due to animosity from the ex, but we're nearly a year and half in and she's quite rightly bit frustrated by not meeting them.
I recently tried to bring this up with my Ex that I wanted them to meet her and it was like dropping a nuke. I've never seen someone so angry... she refused point blank to even discuss it - citing it wasn't healthy for the kids - and instead took the opportunity to absolutely rip me to pieces on everything from my looks, to my school results?! She has also withheld bringing the kids to me on my day on two occasions until "I get the idea out of my head".
While I know I don't need her consent, I did want her to be onboard with the situation so we could address together any questions the kids might have but unfortunately that's not going to be likely. Do I just go ahead and introduce them and manage the fall out? I think i've been more than fair leaving it this long...
Apologies bit of a ramble.