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Not sure how to help

1 reply

Geekydad · 21/10/2020 14:01

So, I am new to this. So bear with me....
I am fast heading towards 40 and am with an amazing 23 year old. We have been together for 5 years or so and have an almost 3 year old boy together.
I never wanted kids but it happened and I rolled with it and now wouldn't change it for the world.
Having a much younger girlfriend has issues at times and we bicker like any other couple but overall we are fairly strong together.
After maternity leave we decided that she wouldn't go back to work and instead stay at home with the baby (I would have done so but the earning difference wouldn't allow it) We came to this decision as child care is sooo expensive and also we wanted to bring our child up ourselves (not that there is an issue with anyone choosing child care)
Anyway, the kid is coming up to 3 years old and we will start to get some free hours soon to send him to preschool but in the meantime by girlfriend is getting bored.....
I have managed to buy a shared ownership home in the last few months and am working hard to save up to buy more as quick as I can. Mainly because I am getting older and if I leave it too long my mortgage length gets less and less....
My girlfriend is very crafty and into home design and so wants to keep herself busy by doing stuff around the house but I keep putting the brakes on due to money, and this doesn't go down well.
So my question to the group is, how can I be supportive of her and help her not be so bored but whilst keeping one eye on the future and focusing on providing for my family?

Long post... sorry. Like I said, I'm new and looking for some advise from anyone that has been through anything similar.

OP posts:
Duemarch2021 · 23/10/2020 23:18

Sorry I haven't got much advice really.. but what is it that shes bored of? Is it being at home? Like you said, you will get some free hours soon so maybe she can find a little part time job for when your child is in preschool? But until then, i suppose it's just keeping as occupied as possible.. I'm assuming she takes your child out daily for walks and picnics etc? Does she have friends she can see? You've done the right thing by purchasing a house and getting on the ladder and now need the money so she should understand that saving right now is the most important thing.. are you in the new house now? And im assuming she wants to paint and decorate? Can she maybe focus on one room to do up for now so its not as expensive.. maybe if shes creative she can make the decoration herself lile curtains and cusions etc? Maybe go to charity shops and do them up.. get your child to help? Im probably not helpful sorry

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