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Dadsnet

Speak to new fathers on our Dads forum.

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Original poster

i have a very upset and down partner

22 replies

goldenwings · 16/06/2007 10:16

hi. my dp has been forced to sell his pride and joy and hes not a happy bunny. its his motorbike and hes really upset that he has to sell.

hes had this bike for a couple of years (before he met me) and was always out on it before ds came along in october 06.

anyway i dont know what to do with him. hes really upset about it and hes been really quiet. what makes it worse is that his sisters dp will be buying it and they live across the road from us so dp will see the bike everyday. hes alwayssaid that if he has to sell he would want to sell it to a stranger so he didnt have to keep looking at it.

how can i cheer him up?

OP posts:

Budababe · 16/06/2007 10:18

Why does he have to sell? And if he knows it will upset him to sell it to family why do it? He may even get a better price from a stranger!

Original poster

goldenwings · 16/06/2007 10:23

we need a quick sell because of our council tax. basically we were told not to pay ct until the claim was assessed. then we were told not to pay anything until june. now its june weve been hit with a 600 pound bill for last year and they want 900 pound upfront for 07/08 year which is completley unreasonable.

its a mess and dp needs to sell his bike for 2 grand (its worth more)to get these people off our backs. the council arent listening to us and want money that we dont have unless he sells the bike.

OP posts:

lisa111 · 16/06/2007 10:25

SEX? SEX? SEX?

Maybe he sold to his sis's dp so he could but it back some day.

brandnewhelsy · 16/06/2007 10:26

Can't you talk to them and offer to pay so much a month? Sorry if you've already tried this. Tell them you don't have it and say how much you can pay? Who advised you not o pay until it was assessed? Was it the council? Don't understand how you're suppoed to pay something when you don't know how much it is!

filthymindedvixen · 16/06/2007 10:27

no advice but massive sympathy. DH gets depressed cos his bike is sitting rotting in the garage and we can't afford to fix it and he really misses the biking days....

NurseyJo · 16/06/2007 10:30

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

Original poster

goldenwings · 16/06/2007 10:35

ok we put a claim in for our council tax as dp is on minimum wage last year we kept chasing it up, providing wage slips and other relevant paperwork. got told to pay nothing at all until the claim had been assessed.

now theyve finished with the claim we cant get help and have been hit with these bills. weve spoken to god knows how many different people about this. supplied more wage slips and all through this weve been offering to pay something every week only to be told no not until claim is assessed.

dp feels we have been royally stung and seriously hes truly gutted. im going to CAB monday but ive got a feeling i will be wasting my breath.

OP posts:

lisa111 · 16/06/2007 10:35

This Years council tax 07/08 You should be allowed to pay monthly.

Last years bill, they may take you to court if you don't pay, you will have court costs added, but you can arrange to pay it off monthly?

I live on the Wirral, maybe your council does thigs differently.

Good Luck.

anorak · 16/06/2007 10:38

But didn't you know this money would be asked for eventually? Didn't you realise you would have to budget for it?

lisa111 · 16/06/2007 10:44

Can you prove that you gave them all the correct information needed for last year reciepts etc.

If you can its down to them, you supplied the correct documents its not your fault that they made the mistake.

I would go to CAB first thing Monday morning.

Original poster

goldenwings · 16/06/2007 10:44

ok last years we could understand but no we did not expect for them to ask for it all in one go after telling us for months not to pay anything. as i said we have told them we will pay what we could whilst the claim was being assessed.

the 07/08 year is concerning me. i dont understand how they can ask for that all in one go. surely thats not right? thats what im going to be sorting monday as i dont think thats fair.

this is the first time i have lived on my own and dp has always privatley rented (and could afford to) so its all new to us.

OP posts:

brandnewhelsy · 16/06/2007 10:45

Lisa111, that's what I was thinking - if they still do attachments to earnings it should be possible to pay off less than that to avoid it getting to that situation, IYSWIM. Bet the CAB can help more than you think. Do you know who you spoke to who as advising you not to pay yet/do you have anything in writing?

anorak · 16/06/2007 10:49

I must admit I have experienced this before years ago when I was a property manager. I had a dispute due to the fact that I was being charged for two flats where only one existed. I was told not to pay until the dispute was settled and then suddenly had a huge bill thrust upon me.

I finally settled it by writing to the leader of the London borough council involved. Perhaps going to the top might help you.

One thing I have learned is that you can't prove anything that's been said to you on the phone and you do need to put everything in writing and keep copies. Then if it ever goes to court there is something for them to make a judgement with.

Original poster

goldenwings · 16/06/2007 10:52

yes we have the pay nothing in writing as well as various other letters. we have wage slips and bank statements.

dp usually phones these people as i have limited patience with them. however im not about to take their bullshit. we called yesterday and they are now insisting on a post office statement from me even though they know i get paid with a giro and the account in question hasnt been used since july 06. this flat has caused nothing but finacial problems grrrr.

although i know its a bonus having everything in writing. at least we can prove what weve been told

OP posts:

lisa111 · 16/06/2007 10:52

Anorak,
its taken over 12 months to sort out last years bill. Dont you think they have a cheek demanding last years bill all at once if goldenwings kept on at them to sort it out.

brandnewhelsy · 16/06/2007 10:58

Sounds like you may be on firm ground to me - Anorak's right, they can easily deny having said anything you don't have in writing, so if you have letters that's better. See what CAB say. Hope he can keep his bike! DH still pines for his, sold a long time ago to buy a car.

lisa111 · 16/06/2007 10:59

Have you got your phone bills to prove the amount of times they were rang over this?

When i was working part-time i had to send in my last 2 bank statements to prove i never had savings that would reduce my housing/council tax benefit award.

lisa111 · 16/06/2007 11:08

anorak
Not just keep copies but get proof of postage too. I always pay for recorded delivery when i write to my council.

Especially when i am renewing my yearly housing application. I have been on the list 15 years and still waiting and waiting and waiting. and overcrowded

Original poster

goldenwings · 16/06/2007 11:08

thats the one thing we dont have. we ring on mobile as cant ring out on house phone.

but we have proof of everything else.

OP posts:

lisa111 · 16/06/2007 11:16

MY dp's mum was killed on the back of a motorbike, he was only 7 years old when it happened. Rita died on 09/09/1990. all the 9's.

Our son was born on her birthday, our new rule is to place a photo of daniel on her grave every year on their birthday.

Bamzooki · 16/06/2007 11:43

Not much experience with CT disputes - but it does sound unreasonable to have to pay it all at once - get as much advice as you can before stumping up the cash.
You have my sympathies regarding the bike withdrawal symptoms - have the same with my dh. He sold his last year - his choice, because he wasn't getting to use it much due to the nature of his job, and it was too much money to have sitting around doing nothing. But now it's spring and the weather is better he is really missing it.
One suggestion for later if your dp does have to sell: Previously during an 'in between bikes phase' when dh was down about it - I went to the nearest Harley garage who hire bikes out, and arranged for us to take an Electroglide out for 24 hrs. You can do shorter time periods too. Was fab - we toured the Peak District in amazing comfort. There were other models available to hire too.
Anyway - it perked dh up no end at the time.

brandnewhelsy · 18/06/2007 21:50

Goldenwings, any news?

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