Expectant Father looking for some Advice please Dads

[TheExpectantFather]

Hi dads,

I ran this question in the Pregnancy forum and got a really good response and I'd appreciate your help here too.

I'm trying to run a series about things an Expectant Father should know to make it easier for him and his partner during her pregnancy.

I've already had some advice, here

expectant-father.7879designs.com/i-wish-id-known-part-1/

If any of you have any tips that you'd be prepared to pass on then please can you leave me a reply to this thread.

Thanks very much for your help, Ian.
expectant-father.7879designs.com/

hiya (i'm a mum hope you don't mind me tlaking to you ) looked at your site and it looks very good, (DH is darling husband btw) there's an acroms list at the top

anyhow, I think for DH the biggest thing was the moods but he became very very good and aware at tuning in quickly to them, a good example was when I smashed the lid from the crock pot on the floor DH was dying to laugh but darent cos he didn't know if i'd laugh or cry myself, so he tried his best to keep a straight face. I don't think he quite understood how having a baby would effect us as a couple or him as a man, important things for any new dad to bear in mind I think is that the hormones hopefully won't last forever, neither will the screaming and sleepless nights. DH has become very good at the phrase 'yes dear' lol.

also thou, it really really helped he was supportive, mums need the support of all the family which incl's dads, if at all possible, esp for BF mums the mum should be feeding and the dad can do the burping bit (basically get puked on) lol.

DH's is adding you can kiss your weekends good buy, lay ins, ooh and anytime you wanna break for a drink, open your wallet once a week and pour it down the drain (he's joking i'm hoping aboutt hat one! lol)

don't wear new clothes to the hospital, don't try to reeach for the G&A or crack jokes in the, maternity unit (DH got evils not from me I might add)

it's hard until they're about 1 as DH has jsut agreed and then if like us LO is teething it's not really much better than that.

DH thou is a natural with DS being a hands on dad helps it lifts the pressure off of me somewhat - it's important to remember that yes you've been out to work and are tired but any new mum will tell you it's so tiring with a baby honeslty it's not all cups of tea and chatting to our friends (as i'm sure my DH seems to think it is! lol). what's really important for me and makes it easier from my side is that DH will come in at 4.30 and take DS into another room and leave me for half an hour to do tea and forget about everything - it's not much but beleive me half an hour without a child climbing up your leg is really nice! lol.

I know it's prob not much help. but the important thing is to work as a team and to listen - I often say to DH I don't want solutions to the problems I want a cuddle I want a hug - right now in this moment I don't care what the answer is (he's a solution finder). also he's learnt pretty quickly what a balanced meal is and how to cook it - also helps to take turns doing things (am tlaking once baby's here)

and finally cherish every moment. DH wasn't as into being a dad at first as DS was BF and only really intrested in me but now he has a personality & is more active DH is very involved. they're only NB's for a few weeks and once you get thru the first 6 things start to get clearer. hth in someway.

There's no such thing as too much good quality Belgian chocolate. I can't think of anything else you need to know!

but really, being pregnant is so irrelevant in the grand scheme of things. Its when you have the baby that you need to be thinking about because that's when your life changes.

Hiya EF

Lots of tips in here!

I told my 6yo cousin's kid that in the last episode of the Tweenies, Milo gets jealous because Jake cops off with Bella and Milo ends up shooting Jake. He didn't believe me .

Anyone see Sesame Street given the Martin Scorsese treatment?
It is so funny.

Sorry, wrong thread!

Here's the one I meant to post. A list of advice compiled by Justine Roberts on 3 November 2004 in The Guardian:

*Bribery works.
*It's perfectly OK to have a glass of wine at 5.30pm.
*Before children, luxury is a day at a spa. Afterwards it's having a bowel movement without someone shouting at you through the door.
*Baby wipes clean everything. So you can throw all your other cleaning products away - there's no need for them any more.
*It is possible for a one-year-old to get stuck in a cat flap, and if he does, it will be a toss-up whether you free him or run for the camera.
*You can tell your child's height by looking at the snot marks on your jeans.
*If there's a hole, they will put something into it.
*A small child weighing no more than two stone takes up at least two-thirds of a king-size double bed.
*The male incapacity to keep hands and willy apart starts at a distressingly young age
*There's no one like a young child for letting your friends know what you really think of them.
*Children don't actually die if they eat cat food .. it may even give them shinier hair and stronger teeth.
*Babies are just as happy with the box something came in as they would be with any toy you could buy them. Consequently, second children mostly own boxes that boring things came in.
*Just when you have managed to move everything out of their reach, they will learn to get a chair to make themselves taller.
*Opening a newbox of nappy sacks to discover that they are a different colour to the normal ones (and subconsciously debating which you prefer) can be the highlight of your day.
*You will stare at other parents' buggies to check out whether they are better than yours even though you know it is a sad thing to do.
*No matter how squeamish you are, you will, at some point, cup your hands to catch their sick.
*You will prod your sleeping baby just to check they're still alive.
*Or you'll be too scared to go into their room at night in case they are dead.
*You will regularly shout, Stop shouting! at the top of your voice.
*Whatever your intentions, you will end up sounding just like your mother.
*If you drop the baby, it's an accident; but if your partner puts her down a touch too hard, it's grounds for full-scale war.
*You will find that your partner's need for sleep is always greater than yours.
*It doesn't make you a bad parent if you draw a moustache on the baby for a laugh, but it's best not to do it with indelible marker the day before an appointment with the health visitor.
*If you make home seem really boring, they will be much more willing to go to school.
*You must accept that once your child can talk, they will from then on know more than you and you will become more stupid in proportion to their increasing knowledge.
*Other people's babies - the ones who sleep through the night from two weeks, and behave immaculately in later months - are cobbled together in a laboratory somewhere.
*If you feel there is any chance of the cuddly toy you are about to purchase being THE ONE, buy two and save yourself a lot of trauma later.
*Never wake a sleeping baby - unless it's got
jaundice.
*At the supermarket, put everything they nag you for in your trolley, then, when they aren't looking, take it all out and scatter it in the aisles.
*When your small baby hasn't had a poo for two days, you should dress it in a babygrow with feet attached.
*Get a cordless phone that allows you to walk about the house while you talk. That way you can wipe bottoms, sort out fights and even do the ironing while you chat to friends. Alternatively, you could tie a phone to your head with a pair of tights.

lol

Thanks for the replies.

I'll pop a link into the Guardian article, it seems fairly complete

Mumz I'll write yours up into a post shortly with full credit.

Thanks again for your help.

Ian
The Expectant Father