This doesn't really belong anywhere, so I thought I'd put it in here.
A critic tells the story of how he once had to endure what was, at the time, his most unenjoyable night at the theatre. It was a woeful, amateurish adaptation of "The Diary Of Anne Frank", in which the insipid direction, turgid dialogue and general incompetence were conspiring to make the whole thing a rather painful experience.
The worst thing of all was the acting - nobody, not least the actress playing Anne, seemed able to infuse their character with the least bit of realism or sympathy.
Finally, at the climax of the play the Nazi stormtroopers broke into the house - and one despairing voice in the stalls, obviously unable to take any more, shouted:
'She's in the attic!'