how is your man around the house???

[MindShaker]

Im sitting here now thinking i should be doing more in the house when im not at work and when i come home i would like to know if the majority of blokes are the same as me? lazy

dh works full time nights
I am currently looking for term time work as all the kids are at school now and i am bored with being the doormat for the past 22 yrs
we only have 4 kids left at home now, one with SN

dh is good but I dont expect him to do anything housework wise, as i cope with the running of the house
but if I ask him to help, he will gladly

great with kids

1. Does your man work? fulltime/partime? full-time Out of the house from 7.30 to 5 or 6.

2. Do you work? or are you a SAHM? SAHM (just for now)

3. What does your man do around the house i:e chores etc? Lots!

We don't have specific tasks that each of us do but I have heard that type of thing being successful for other families. DH tends to muck in and get on with what needs to be done without having to be asked. We sickeningly work as a perfectly synchronised team most of the time.

Between him coming home and the children being put to bed (usually a 2 hour period) we cook, clean up the kitchen, empty kitchen bin if needed, play with children, feed children, wash-up, bath children (every other night) and put them to bed. No one task is his or mine. We both do all of these things. On a weekend we blitz the house taking an area each. i.e. someone cleans the kitchen and bathroom/the other one vacuums and dusts.

He probably does more than I expect of him. What is the minimum I'd expect? Cooking 2/3 nights per week. Washing up if I cook. Picking up after himself and the children when he notices something untidy before me. Putting laundry away. Putting one of the children to bed.

There's never any resentment in our household. I think that does help. I was always attracted to men who could take care of themselves and their own house/space. It probably is a turn-on in the sense that he never does anything to leave me resentful and turned-off!

I'm curious to know what you do when you get home from work and your wife is still busy with household chores....

My dp who i've only lived with for 1 month and a week or so is very good

but not working yet
i'm not working
anything from changing cat litter trays to hoovering, cooking.

Probably subject to change once he's found work!!

he does -
works ft
mows lawn
takes the wheelie bin out and in again
irons
helps with childcare - looks after them when im working (sat and sometimes sun) baths 10mth old at least 3/4 times a week. sometimes puts them to bed.
empties dishwasher
washing (50/50)
tidies up
hoovers
makes bottles

me -
work ft as a childminder (8am til 6pm mon to fri)
work pt as a carer (sat 3pm til 10pm and sometimes sun)
most childcare
alot of housework, eg its always me that hoovers the stairs, mops floors, dusts, makes bed, diy and cooking

basically like it when he comes home asks what needs doing, we dont sit down til its all done and we sit down together! we take it in turns to have lie in, when i work he tidies so its ready for monday morning.

also when baby was younger he would take the kids out on a sat so i could go to bed for a few hours as it was me getting up in the night when he was working.

My DH works full time. I work part time from home. However I consider trying to keep 2 kids entertained and a house reasonably clean to be more physically demanding than most jobs I have done OTH.

My DH is reasonably good, he cooks a lot (cos he enjoys it) but wo things annoy me in the main:

1. getting home from work, and offering to help with cooking the meal when what I'd really like is for him to bath the kids so I can have a break from them. So Mindshaker, helping out with the kids is more imortant (I think) on arrival back from work than anything else. PLus they will enjoy spending time with you

2. Implying that somehow he is 'helping me out' by doing housework. We have a cleaner most weeks but when we have to do it ourselves (ie major housework like vacuuming etc) he somehow seems to feel that he shouldn't really be doing it.

The best thing you could do is look to see what needs doing, and do it. If your DW is anything like me the thing that really narks is having to ask for things to be done - it puts us in the position of being 'in charge' of the housework, encourages what our DH's call 'nagging' and reduces thew man to a subservient, child-type position. If you want to have an equal relationship try thinking about it a bit more and not waiting to be told what to do.

And, oh, don't say "at least I'm not like so-and-so's husband", meaning the lazy fat git down the road who is the lowest common denomenator in the household stakes. Not one to compare yourself with!

dh works full time

I work part time as a childminder and I'm also a SAHM iyswim

He makes me a cup of tea every morning before he goes to work. He emptys the dishwasher if it needs doing when he gets in. He does the bins. Hoovers occasionaly. Cooks tea for us or kids if I've not done it, takes childminding child home every night,does supermarket shop. Only if prompted or asked he cleans bathrooms, washes floors, mows grass ( hates this though) does tons of DIY ( he's an electrition) hangs out washing, tidys toys, sweeps floor, changes bedding, tidys kitchen. I do do house work its just that he does too! Its teamwork as usually one of us is with the kids, playing or feeding etc and the other is doing a job. He's fab!!!! All my friend want him for themselves

Oh yeah he gives me a lie-in whenever he's not going to work, helps bath kids and does stories everynight.

I agree with wordsmith. If we have to ask dh to do jobs it can come across as whiney (s?)or naggy, much better for you to do it before someones asked you.

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