Does all the 'mums and kids' advertising on TV bother you?

[AnnieLobeseder]

Just seen yet another advert on TV about how 'mums and kids love X product so much'. There seems to be an endless stream of then, never any sign of dad and kids, and when it comes to buying anything for the family, the implication seems to be that mum will be making that decision all by herself, thank you very much.

I just asked DH if he cares that according the World of Advertising (which is, after all, a reflection of society and its expectations), he has no influence or relevance in his children's lives. He shrugged and said he doesn't care, it's just advertising.

A fair few of we women get rather upset about the constant gender stereotypes in advertising - women are always the carers and nurturers. If you're any kind of decent dad, you must do caring and nurturing too, and have some say in the food your kids eat and the clothes they wear. Does it ever bother you that you're so sidelined?

Annie, fwiw I'm pretty much with your dh on this. As a nation we have a goodly proportion of single parent families ( more than 2+2) and the vast majority of these are mother-led, so advertisers would have a focus on their spending power and decision-making primacy.
For the household product adverts I really couldn't care if Bill or Mary were to be used - it's the value of the product that's important. And if we are hoping to have a cultural shift in domestic-responsibility taking, the last place to look for support would be the advertising industry - there is no motivation for them to do it i.e if Bill or Mary buys an item, it's still 'one unit shifted' for them - no extra profit if Bill buys it.

The other curious thing was an advert lambasted on this site, for First Choice holidays, which implied that the father had actually been clever enough to book a good family holiday. The resounding sneer in these pages (amongst other tenuous criticisms) was 'yeah that didn't happen, but he takes all the credit'. So screwed if you do, screwed if you don't.
So no, as a dad I don't feel sidelined at all. And also the notion that the World of Advertising is a reflection of society is fairly erroneous.

I'm with you OP. The recent Proctor & Gamble ones about mums for the Olympics make me want to vomit. I'm assuming the intention is that we go all misty eyed and associate maternal love with their products, but come on...

Advertising is sexist totally (remember that fab Mitchell & Webb sketch?), but it's not so much guilty of being sexist as it is of assuming that we're all totally thick.

But then, seeing as it works, maybe we are...

I'm not a dad (or a man) but it bothers me. The World of Advertising is a very strange world indeed.

I know why advertisers do what they do. What I'm asking is why men don't get upset at never being included in ads about children, the implication being that fathers and their opinions aren't important.

I think men don't 'get upset' over adverts because it doesn't mean very much to us. (well me anyway). I know my opinion re dd has some value, so because advertisers don't focus and me or other dads I wouldn't get upset over it. As Trills says the world of advertising is a weird one. IT doesn't mean I am immune to the effects of advertising - just keep it in perspective and do understand why the advert makers focus on mums.

Another curious thing is how mens clothes adverts are aimed at women. i.e" if I buy that shirt that's been modelled, may be my man will look like the rugged Argentinian polo player? Erm..no...he still looks like an accountant from Grimbsy"
6 months later.."maybe if I buy him that coat he will look like Benedict Cumberbatch?.....nope, still the accountant from Grimbsy!".
Probably most men's clothes are bought by women, or the choice is very heavily influenced by them.

I don't mind these types of adverts so much, At least they show that someone cares etc.

Remove the child and the woman becomes helpless and needs some sort of superhero (yes normally a male symbol) help.

Put a male in there and he becomes a bumbling 'Mr Bean' type buffoon and only a woman can help him out.

LePan, my DH gets very annoyed about sexist advertising and not just the ones that portray men as useless lumps not capable of househould chores and childcare either.

Malificence - I was talking about the supposed effects of advertising to make dads feel sidelined re the care of their children, and saying it doesn't invite me to feel that way,and I suspect most other dads as well. It just isn't that potent in that way. The more broad sexism in advertising is something else, I think.