Question about, ahem, anal sex. Dh has tried it with ex's but won't with me!

[JoyceDivision]

And before you bother, I'll get the first dig out of the way: No, I'm not so ugly he can't even bear to shag the back of me, boom boom

But, looking for a blokes perspective (or ladies!) about this

Married to lovely dh, 3dc, obv anything that I try is going to be with dh now so am a bit -fed up-- puzzled that I can't seem to get him to let me rty this out.

It's one thing I've never tred wirth past partners and now I would. I'm aware it might not be fab, biut then again it might, and I won't know until I try it! And the iudea of it is a turn on for me..

I know that dh let slip ageeeesss ago he had done this with ex's and was not bothered too much about it, he didn't seem to find it a massive turn on or off. But when I broache drthe subject the firs time, his response was 'I can't do that to you, you're my wfe!'. Well, chivalry isn't what I'm looking for right now! . I think I'm fairly open minded and laid back, I've found his porn previously and am fine with it, so I'm not prudish (obv!)

Dh does, ahem, er, do nice things around that area but he won't seem to do thet whole thing!

Any idea why, how to persuade him otherwise? Am being daft I now but I feel oike I'm missing out!

no, the cervix is NOT a stimulant at all. It just gets in the way usually. ( apols to the wonderfully-named AtYourCervix).

sorry malificence, that was me (i'm not the OP), i meant fortyplus not you! apols!

I think you'll find the anterior fornix is quite instrumental in both the female and male orgasm, pan. I suppose it depends on the angle of the cervix and also the positon of the uterus though.

ha! Have you been googling, Mal?

No, I'm just well educated on human physiology and sexual matters.
I could be a sexual health nurse for all you know.

Really?

not just random men I quiz about bum sex. bahahaha. quote of the year!

Woah Malificence! It wasn't m starting on you!

Thanks for all the replies. I appreciate fromdh's comments the very likely explanation is he has tried it, and isn't that bothered about it. However, I'm not trying to 'force' him into doing this, but I am a bit peeved that I'm not going to get to try something that is nagging at me curiosity -wise, as I'm not intending on replacing dh!

I don't know what part of it is appealing to me, and my friends have given mixed reports on it, some loved it, some hated it, and the bible on bumsex, ie mumsnet, has varied reports too!

However, curiosity killed the cat, satisfaction brought it back

I appreciate if I tried it, within 3 seconds it might be a very loud NO but then again I might love it,I'm just peeved I'm missing out on trying it...

No harm if you try DIY.

Give it a go but first it's a good idea to use your fingers to loosen you up a bit, before you go for the cock.

pre DW I had done bumsex... when I got together with DW we had such good times with the rumpy pumpy action inc her squirting TMI for some....that bumsex never came up ..oops sorry for that.... however (isn't there always a however).... one, shall we say "sporting" night DW shifted slightly when I was on the outward stroke that on the inward I ended up in the wrong hole.... but we carried on. DW had not had anything but the odd finger play there up till then. I carried on then she wanted to change around so after a quick laugh about the slip up....it was clean up time and carry on..... We spoke about it after and although she allowed it at the time....it wasn't something she enjoyed.... but the finger fun is still allowed....

That sounds very Benny Hill lescombes

I'm still trying to get over the fact that my sphincter involuntary contracts when I read these threads

I'm still checking up on this thread and appreciate all the replies, I 'm still trying to persuade dh to let me slip off my pedestal for a bit so he doesn't think of me as his deal wifey that he possibly couldn't do it t o!

Lescombes... that sounds very and and Do you mind me asking you, since it's a blokes perspectve, and you mentioned you'd tried it before DW, did you enjoy it and want to try it with DW or were you not bothered?

JD - I still know the problem is in your dh's head, as you say. Pedestals ARE there to be fallen off, feet ALWAYS turn to clay. But..the position of being a loving wife and mother does not preclude some alternative activity, and, he will know you in a new way. Always interesting.

I feel I might be in the minority here but I LOVE anal sex!
The feel of DH inside me combined with the taboo factor make the whole experience a real turn on. Its not something we do all the time, just when were feeling particularly horny but it always gets results from DH :) He says it feels completely different to the vagina, tighter and different position for his penis.
It feels so good for me too.

Having said that, I definitely think that both participants have to be into it for it to work. Patience, and a lot of lube are needed! We use an Ann Summers anal lube as it contains a muscle relaxant which really makes a difference and makes the experience much more pleasurable.

My advice would be to take it slow and experiment with each other. DH isnt up for any penetration on his part but he does love it when I rub around his anus. So try getting him to do that on you rather than go all the way. There are so many nerve endings in that area on both men and women its a shame that they get left out!

I tried it with the DW a few years ago (her suggestion, I never fancied it) Used KY and started with fingers but hmm.. my key was waay to big to fit her lock... and I don't know who it hurt the most!
I totally agree with the last bit sammy said about the nerve endings. Maybe you could try rubbing around his bum while doing a bj. Show him how good it can feel and ask if he'll rub around yours later ;)

OP, just buy a butt plug and get you DH to insert that in you instead then you'll both be happy - win win

OP:

I administered it once or twice in the past, and it's nothing special. Kind of ended up being a tick in a box really, and I've not bothered with it since.

Of course, if you still want to try it out with DH then the two of you could always go to Center Parcs

ugh. I'm with you missbehiving