I'm really struggling with die/der/das

[SnuggleBuggleBoo]

I've been learning German on Duolingo for a while, which is fun, but they seem to think you'll pick up on how grammar works just through practicing sentences. It's not working for me though! I'm learning to read German this way but don't have a hope of writing or speaking it because I just can't figure out the gender thing. Please advise!!

So I understand that nouns have genders and you use 'die' for female, 'der' for male and 'das' for neuter. That's all fine. What is absolutely melting my brain is the whole 'Dative/Accusative/definite article/indirect object..' palaver. I cannot understand what any of that means and I am so confused about why you should ever have to change the gender word you use just because the thing is on the receiving end of something. And the way you sometimes shove an 'en or an em' on the end of 'mein' or 'dein' or whatever.

Ok so it seems I haven't even mastered English yet!! I don't even know how to explain it! I keep watching Youtube videos but they're just making it worse! I need someone to explain things to me like I'm a very small, somewhat slow child. Please can you either have a bash yourself or link me to some helpful resource? Thank you!!

@3Tunes How do you know what level you're at on Duolingo? I think I'm still A1 but it would be cool to know!

I have also found Michel Thomas excellent for learning German !

@Fairislefandango

'On the upside, the majority of the time you will be understood perfectly well even if you get them wrong!'

I've just come back from a week in Germany and have a funny/embarrassing anecdote to share! I wanted to ask at the hotel if I could stay another night, and tried them with:

'Ist es möglich, dass ich morgennacht blieben können?'

There was a moment's hesitation, then the answer (in English):

'Not normally, but you can take an umbrella'

!!!!

I'm so intrigued as to what they think I said?!!

More Big Thanks to you all! I'm very much appreciating all the help!

I think they may have thought you said “is it possible it could rain tomorrow” or “ist es möglich, das es morgen Nacht regen könnte?“

That das, should be dass…autocorrect on phone…

I think you meant „'Ist es möglich, dass ich Morgen Abend bleiben könnte?“

Id probably say „Hätten Sie vielleicht noch für Morgen Abend ein Zimmer frei, ich würde gern meinen Aufenthalt verlängern wenn möglich“ or something like that.

I think they probably did understand 'regnen', if you said 'blieben' with an ee sound. In German 'normalerweise' (from which they probably translated 'normally' in their head) can (very colloquially) mean something like 'it's supposed to', so in this case 'it's not supposed to', i.e. it's not forecast.

I thought you were supposed to use "uebernachten" rather than "bleiben" in the "staying overnight" context?

Yes, but you wouldn't say in a hotel 'kann ich noch einmal übernachten?' You'd say something like 'Ginge es, eine zusätzliche Nacht zu bleiben?' 'Übernachten' is more 'stay overnight' in the sense of 'I'm going to stay overnight with my friend after our night out' or 'there will be an overnight stay after the conference'.

Ah, thank you @ShoesoftheWorld ! It's really helpful to understand these nuances.

Click on 3 lines at the top left under the German flag.

And I’m still looking for an app to drill me in German grammar!

Try learning Welsh - half the bloody word changes depending on where it is in the sentence.

Cardiff = Caerdydd
In Cardiff = Yng Nghaerdydd

Girl = merch
The girl = y ferch

Ok so more advice needed please!

I finished the Paul Nobel book recommended by a previous poster (loved it, just my style!) and I'm confused about something. In sentences where there's an accusative and a dative he's got the accusative first:

'Ich habe die Milch dem Baby gegeben'
'Ich habe das geld der Taxifahrerin geschickt'

and all that jazz. But according to my mother, who lived in Germany for 8 years, the dative should always come first?! Any native speakers on here who can clarify that for me?

I'm not a native speaker, but near enough, and I would put the dative first - in those examples and others.
I've just looked this up and I'm right, but what I wouldn't have added (though I guess I do it naturally) is that things change if there are pronouns involved (!) - this is a really good overview (from an Austrian source but presumably Austrian Standard German is the same as German Standard German in this respect).

https://www.dialog-wien.at/ueber-uns/blog/akkusativ-vor-dativ-oder-dativ-vor-akkusativ/

The dative object comes before the accusative object (not subject), except if the accusative object is a personal pronoun, in which case the pronoun goes first.

I might break this rule if I wanted to place more emphasis on one of them.

So it would be:

'Ich habe der Taxifahrerin das Geld geschickt'

but

'Ich habe es der Taxifahrerin geschickt'

?

Duolingo is good for revision (that is what I use it for), but really bad for learning a new language because of the really bad garmmar background.

This.

I am learning Dutch from scratch on Duolingo, and I have bought a grammar book to go alongside it, because I need to understand what I'm doing - what the building blocks are. Also, I like a good verb table, I find them soothing, buy I might he unusual in that... There are slso lots of good and less good online resources.

I learnt German at evening classes, and I was fine with cases, because I'd already come across the concept in Latin at school. I'm doing German Duolingo as revision and they don't approach learning cases as I would, nor as I had it in classes.

In English, word order is very important. Man bites dog is not the same meaning dog bites man. In languages with cases, the word ending usually indicates the meaning, and in theory, word order is less important. As a rough guide, nominative is subject, accusative object, genitive possession and dative indirect object - but many prepositions take particular cases, and you just have to learn them. So in German you go mit dem Bus (which is dative) and literally means with the bus, whereas in English we go on the bus - and in English, we know that by word order alone.

(I suppose it depends how much you understand English grammar and syntax as whether this is of any use; most of what I know about English I learnt from learning foreign languages.)

Totally with you on Welsh, @KnickerlessParsons! I'm now on Uwch2 level, and my last homework came back with nearly every mutation wrong. Fortunately, I wasn't alone in this, but...

German is much easier in comparison.