Just for Lou....
Many years ago, I wrote a parody of one of my favourite poems - 'When I am old, I shall wear purple' by Jenny Joseph.
I lost it but mentioned it to Lou the other day and have since redone it - not exactly like the original but here goes:
When I am a lady, I will carry a handbag,
And shall wear underwear that matches,
And shall drink mochachinno and eat antipasta and discuss interest rates.
I shall keep shoes stacked neatly in their boxes and will have numerous forms of olive oil and will buy sea salt and ignore the depravity of my youth.
I shall always apply make-up before venturing outside and wear 10 denier tights and 'do lunch'.
I shall buy glossy magazines and balsamic vinegar and ciabatta bread.
But now we must have clothes which can be puked on,
And endure cbeebies and learn perfect animal noises.
We must buy chicken nuggets and sing nursery rhymes loudly in cars.
But maybe I ought to practice a little now?
So people who know me are not too shocked or surprised when suddenly
I am a lady, and carry a handbag