Just been broken into

[blueberrygoose]

I'm on holiday just now and I got a call from my sister today that I have been broken into. I can't get home until tomorrow afternoon but I'm dreading going back to my house. How do you get over this? Never mind the stolen stuff it's the lasting thoughts of feeling safe and what if it happens again?! I can't sleep and been feeling sick to my stomach since I found out. It's a new build and we've not long moved in and apparently there have been a few other break ins too but this kind of thing has never happened to me before and i mainly stay there with my two kids on my own as my husband works out the country. 

Oh shit I'm sorry. Being broken into is one of my biggest fears.

I do always think it's unlikely for a robber to return to the scene of the crime though.

Was anything taken?

Sorry just read that you had stuff stolen!

Could you put up some external lighting to make you feel a bit safer? Or have someone to stay with you a couple of nights when you get back?

Thanks for your reply. Yes I do need to do something about the security of the place but I'm already paranoid about checking all windows and doors are locked when I go out, but these people actually smashed through the back doors. I suppose I never thought it would happen to me. It's the worst feeling in the world.

We got broken into 7 years ago, pre children but it was awful, like you we where away and I'm grateful for that.

The feeling of a person having been through your private space and almost like contaminating your belongings is really sickening, for a long while I slept with a knife in our room which wasn't ideal but it was a comfort to me,

I hated the curtains being open as soon as it was dark and people being able to see in.
It never even crosses my mind now and I can't really remember how long it took but just wanted to let you know that feeling fades so please don't let it put you off your home if you loved it before

Thank you for your reply. I'm trying to stay positive and hopefully I can forget about it one day too. It just doesn't feel like it now.

It won't, it's such an invasion of privacy, I wouldn't wish it on my worst enemy. Do you have a friend or relative that will stay with you the first few days after your husband is back to work?

Oh, I am so sorry. Having your privacy invaded like that is such a horrible thing to go through.

It happened to me in 2002, I had also just bought the house and I couldn't settle for a while. The police even told me who had done it but they couldn't officially catch him. Bastard. He took all of my grandmothers jewellery.

The thing is that most burglars are opportunists. All you can do is increase our security and use deterrents.

I went overboard, I bought a burglar alarm, locks on windows etc but then a few years later saw a documentary about fires and how these things prevented you escaping in the event of an emergency.

Now I barely think about it but I do hold a lot less sentimentality regarding stuff. I have no interest in having valuable things in my home since then.

Given that there were several break ins could you set up a neighbourhood watch type thing in your area??

Even if you aren't particularly active the stickers will dissuade potential intruders.

It's crap.

But no, it's not unlikely they return, unfortunately. Some of the bastards wait for the insurance haul.

So sorry to hear that .
It’s been happening quite a lot lately where I live , in the same manner too- back door glass smashed .
If it’s any consolation you can get special reinforced glass with a plastic layer inbetween that’s supposed to make it very hard to break .
A local tradesmen should be able to help if you are on a local residents page .
Just a warning and not meant to frighten you at all but sometimes burglars can come back at a later date as most people replace the stolen items so definitely get the glass reinforced , security light and a bloody loud house alarm

I'm so sorry, it's such a horrible thing to happen. We were broken into earlier this year. The police were brilliant though - there were other burglaries on the same day and the forensic team got lots of evidence. The guy that did it was caught very quickly and was sentenced exactly two months later. We have made some changes to security but nothing major. The insurance claim was sorted very quickly and easily too.

I certainly feel for you. We were broken in to while we were asleep. It took a long time to get over struggled to sleep, worried about every little noise. We invested in CCTV and a house alarm and feel much more secure now.

You do get over it but it did take a while for me

Thanks for all your replies. It's interesting about the plastic stuff you can get for the glass, I'll need to look into that. We have upped the security and just need to get an alarm now. Unfortunately I don't have insurance yet but that's worrying me now that sometimes they come back when they think insurance has paid out. Some of the jewellery was irreplaceable anyway. My mum stayed the first two nights but struggling with noises in the house etc as it's a new house I'm still getting used to it.

My street seems to be burglary central. My house and neighbours were burgled when we had building works (unoccupied). My other neighbour got burgled when they were away, despite having a burglar alarm (it was ripped out). I feel like we are sitting ducks and it will be our turn again soon. Apart from a burglar alarm which we use religiously day and night, we have put a CCTV, lights on timer when we are away and will soon put security lights. We also photographed all our valuables in case we needed to make an insurance claim. We are part of a neighbourhood watch and the Met Police smartwater campaign with stickers proclaiming this on our front windows.

I'm sorry to hear this.

It happened to me about 10 years ago.

I was in the house at the time (town house with 4 floors). They broke in at around 4 in the morning and me and my then partner slept through it all, only to discover what had happened as they made additional noise taking our things when fleeing the property (we were 2 floors above the break in point).

Luckily, they only managed to take non sentimental items - mainly electronic equipment (mobile phones, wallets/purses/TV/stereo - that type of thing). Thankfully my jewellery (I have a lot of inherited pieces) was all in the bedroom.

I won't pretend - it felt bloody awful.

Especially knowing they were in our home as we slept and if they hadn't been so greedy trying to wrestle the TV off the wall we'd have likely not know until we woke up at normal time.

Chilling to know they could have got to our bedroom whilst we were drowsy/asleep and vulnerable.

We spent the next few weeks waking up a every single odd sound - it was exhausting.

What helped?

Well money and time.

One thing we were told (and I'm sorry this isn't going to help) is that some professional burglars deliberately target the same house a few months later. Why? Well they already know the layout of the house and by then insurance has usually kicked in and they know that instead of the old TV they stole last time, there will be a brand new one.

They get away with it because people don't think lightning will strike twice.

So when I say money, we got a professional safety/security assessment of the home and given we had thought it was pretty secure we're surprised at just how vulnerable the property was.

We invested in a massive security upgrade on alarms, locks, CCTV etc.

The later did actually capture thieves attempting to break in via the same entry point 3 months later but being foiled by all the new measures we'd put in place.

That was was ultimately helped me sleep again - knowing we'd secured the house.

To be clear we lived in a nice area that wasn't known for break ins - the police said we (along with a number of neighbours) had probably been targeted for that very reason.

Security system that triggers an alarm call to the police. Motion sensor lights. And a dog. Or if you can’t have a dog, you can get a German shepherd barking recording gadget, that triggers when your doorbell is pushed or when your lights are triggered.

So when I say money, we got a professional safety/security assessment of the home and given we had thought it was pretty secure we're surprised at just how vulnerable the property was

Would you be able to say a bit more about this? We get a lot of prowlers and attempts, bit since we moved in no actual break-ins.

We have got a security camera now as a deterrent, and so next time we can actually give the police some pictures rather than a really shit description...

So sorry OP. I was broken into about a year ago, was horrible. You do get over it but I do think about it often.

I've never had this happen to me so far but I'm so sorry.

Kind of on a tangent but I would highly recommend finding a decent hypnotherapist at some point to help rewire and fade some of your feelings about it. I had treatment for flashbacks a few years ago and it really helped.

Honestly I'd be getting a dog!

Mintich a dog isn’t going to help if you’re away on holiday and it’s in kennels though!

Hi ItsAll,

I'll answer you question as best as I can given it was 10 years ago!

After it happened we looked for a home security consultant. By this I mean someone independent, not a sales person from an alarm company trying to sell you a specific product.

There are a lot of them out there - quite a few (as was ours) are ex-police officers.

They came round and did a really detailed assessment of the house and reviewed the evidence from the theft.

They then produced a really comprehensive set of options (prioritised in terms of cost vs likely deterrent impact/effectiveness ) for us to review and gave advice on products/companies to work with based on their experience (importantly what actually worked).

We had the option then to sort next steps ourselves or (once we'd made our decisions) or for them to project mange the security upgrade.

We chose the latter.

It wasn't cheap, but it was absolutely worth it for the peace of mind and tbh we ended up spending on things we probably wouldn't have thought of, but ultimately were very important and equally less on areas we might have been pushed into by a sales person.

By this I mean less on "super fancy alarms" with pressure sensors and the like and more on good lighting, CCTV and structural integrity of doors/windows/locks, especially things like garden gates/fences that can be easily smashed down to provide exit/entry points.

That's really useful DeRigeur - thanks!

We've got most of that covered I think - especially as our problem is more with junkies looking for an easy entrance, than criminal masterminds.

Hey, sorry it happened - it does get better gradually. I think there are some security steps and some psychological steps I found useful.

Security - we put a padlock on the back gate, cut back some bushes so the gate was less hidden, iniitially put some window and door alarms on, but now have an alarm system (not too pricey) which will ring us if we are out, and which we set at night and when out.

Psychology - reclaim the space, I put a vase and flowers by where they broke a window, clean up the mess and brush yourself off, they are pond life who just want money, so try not to engage with all the thoughts and things peoples say like ‘what if..’ or ‘i would never sleep again’ - you will, this is your home, they were just an unwelcome visitor and gone now. If you actually saw them you would see how pathetic and scared they are. I have made my peace with the fact that bad things do happen in life, and this or other difficulties might happen, however we stick together and get through them. Get angry and find your blitz spirit, it helps.