How do you stay sane while querying agents?

[CakeRage]

I finished my first book earlier this year (after saying for years I was going to write it), and started submitting to agents 3 weeks ago.

I’ve had a couple of replies, both really encouraging, but ultimately both rejections, and I feel like I’m losing my marbles. How do you keep it together while waiting? Not sure I can take the emotional rollercoaster

The first agent replied within hours to ask for the full manuscript, emailed again the following day to say she was halfway through and absolutely blown away by it, then a few days later to say she did love it, but thought it needed a few changes making. I revised the whole thing (10,000 extra words of work), then she replied just to say it wasn’t working, and she wouldn’t be taking it further.

To be honest I’ve been pretty gutted by it. How do you stop the little judgy voice in your head which tells you you were an idiot for getting your hopes up?

The second agent replied to say she was really impressed by my writing, but didn’t feel I was a good fit for her list at the moment, and recommended another agent (different agency) who she thought would like it. I handled that one much better, even though I guess it was more of an abrupt no.

Please tell me how you cope with this stage - or come commiserate with me at its horribleness!

(Sorry for my crazed rambling - feeling all my feelings this week!)

Well done Daphne. After 5 more rejections over the weekend I think I will be following you down the self-pub route. I didn't realise it was free!

Yes, it is blackrabbit. However, I did pay a copy editor and someone to design the cover. Plus if you want to sell your book outside Amazon, you will need to purchase an ISBN I think. It has cost me hundreds rather than thousands though and something I feel was well worth the money. I spend very little money otherwise (other than on the dc), so I treated myself! My treats invariably involve books of one kind or another! Sorry to hear you've not received any good news regarding your book, twice I received the comments 'we do not feel passionately enough' etc. it's really demoralising but I'm glad my writing will find he light of day, even if not by a conventional route.

Lovely to hear a success story!

I've currently lost my drive. Finally finished a long term project during lockdown, queried eight agents - all rejections. Very polite and I'm sure the stock response 'enjoyed reading your work but not for me' etc. I initially took it pretty well, felt philosophical and that the rejections are part of the rites of passage and cracked on with the next idea. I made really good progress, then got about halfway through and suddenly felt disheartened. Not about the new project as such just the whole process. I don't know why. I know the chances of getting an agent are slim, let alone being published. I always thought I'd continue to write for the enjoyment of writing, but suddenly I'm just not feeling it. It's been almost two months or so. I still think my new idea is plausible; I still want to pursue the story, but I just don't have the drive right now.

Has anyone else experienced anything similar?

Cam, I understand the thing about losing your drive. I am trying to write a second book (not yet published first) and feel it is hard going. But my first novel was really written from the heart and I believe it could help others. I'm pleased with it and have belief in it, plus a couple of people who have read it (not within my friendship group) gave really positive feedback. I couldn't not do anything with it if that makes sense.

Daphne, it's great to get good feedback, but that also probably makes the rejections harder. Are you considering the self publishing route?

Perhaps sometimes writers do need a break between projects, especially when you pour so much energy into something. Or maybe I just need to get on with it! I think I probably hold myself back through fear of failure. I think I've probably answered my own question!

Good luck with novel no 2 and with getting no 1 out there.

Yes, definitely going down the self publishing route.

I've had a full out since end of May - should I chase it up, do you think? I am struggling with drive as well. I've been writing short stories during lockdown. Wish I could give up completely but I can't seem to step away!

@TrafalgarSquare

I've had a full out since end of May - should I chase it up, do you think? I am struggling with drive as well. I've been writing short stories during lockdown. Wish I could give up completely but I can't seem to step away!

I'd chase up - you could always say that you would be interested in hearing their feedback rather than framing it as a "do you want it or not?" email. I've seen a lot of comments on social media from agents that they have been overwhelmed by submissions (and, since most are female, childcare) during lockdown but, sheesh, three months is long enough.

Thanks for that, she is indeed female with childcare and I imagine the summer has been busy but she sounded keen at the outset and I'd really like to have her thoughts. I guess chasing won't change the outcome!

I know this is a relatively old thread, but it’s kept me sane this weekend so thought I would post!

Submitted to 6 agents on Thursday evening so now playing the waiting game. Planning on submitting to another 6 next Thursday.

Massive congratulations to everyone who has been signed!!

How exciting tea and biscuits, it's nerve wracking waiting for responses but we've all done it! Fingers crossed you hear something positive - and don't forget to keep a spreadsheet of everyone you've submitted to.

Thank you @LouisaMayAlcott! It’s so inspiring to read your story and others. This wait feels almost like a rite of passage.

I have a spreadsheet and have a copy of the writers and artists yearbook arriving tomorrow to peruse!

Ooh, good luck Tea&b!

It’s definitely a rollercoaster ride, I’ll say that. What genre are you writing in?

It’s YA fantasy...I had the idea 15 years ago and last September my husband told me to stop talking about writing it and actually do it 😂. So here we are!!

Submitted to another 3 agents over the last 24 hours - radio silence from all so far. Lots of interesting articles in the 2021 Writers’ and Artists’ yearbook if anyone else is on the same journey!

The radio silence is pretty normal at the start, don’t let it discourage you. Agents can be busy people at the best of times.

I know I had in my head that the longer I waited the more likely it was that I’d be rejected, but it didn’t turn out that way for me

Thank you @CakeRage - you have no idea how perfectly timed that comment was! I’ve literally been convincing myself that they’ve read it and dismissed it which is why I haven’t heard anything.

I honestly know I SHOULD stay off the internet and not check my emails every few mins...but I also don’t listen to my rational brain very often 😂

How is your publishing journey going? Apologies, I have read the thread but I get everyone’s user name muddled

Good, thank you. I’m currently on submission and feeling ALL of the same emotions you are. I’ve checked my emails about twenty times in the last half hour!

And I’m still relatively sane

Ahh good luck!!! When did you submit?

It’ll be three weeks on Friday so fairly early days still, but I’m still very much in the ‘maybe if I refresh it enough something will appear’ phase.

It’s a little less lonely because my agent is really good at checking in now and again, but still feels kind of agonising. I guess this is the life of a writer, though. Just endless cycles of waiting, stressing and waiting some more with occasional snippets of unbridled joy!

Best of luck, Cake, have you had any feedback? I'm at the same stage, my agent sent out the book about three weeks ago, four passes so far. The last one was a bit of a choker as the editor originally seemed keen but when she took it to the wider team, they talked her out of it .

I’ve had some good feedback but no actual movement yet. A few complimentary passes, which I suppose is something!

Fingers crossed for some good news for us both soon!

I hope you get something more concrete soon @CakeRage. Positive that you’ve had nice feedback about it though.

I hope you get somewhere soon too @everythingcrossed. Must be so gutting to have the rug pulled at the final hurdle 😩

I entered the WMPitch event on twitter yesterday but didn’t get any likes. Not surprised though due to the 1000s of entries!

Still radio silence from all agents. Submitted to 12 so far. It has only been 8 days so it’s very early days still. Just convinced myself that I will hear nothing from any of them - not even a rejection 😂

Thanks, tea - my agent is remaining positive, the feedback tends to be "Wow, loved the book but not sure where it would fit on our list/hard to market" (which kind of reinforces why when you pitch a book to an agent, the advice is to nail the genre and comparables). Hopefully someone will be along soon who loves it that little bit more or can visualise where it would sit in their list.

It's the radio silence that kills you, isn't it? I think I only got about a 50% response rate - it's very demoralising but, if you have the energy, give them another week and send another batch out.

Good luck again, Cake. I'm enjoying the sense that this stage is someone else's responsibility, I can only sit back and wait, no more fretting over a query letter and endless research on the different people to approach .