It's not a proper job.

[HappyWithLife]

Aaarrgghhh....I get sick of the comments when you tell people you write/want to write for a living. I have wanted to write professionally for many years but never had the confidence...however, a couple of recent successes have seen a poem of mine being published in an anthology and I have been commissioned to write a weekly article for a satirical news website. Also I am waiting to hear if I have the columnist job I applied for (I have been shortlisted to the last 7). So why can't people be happy for me? Latest comment was 'well writing is all well and good and a nice little fantasy but don't lose touch with the real world'.
It drives me mad! I've put blood sweat and tears into writing and it's finally, after 41 years, turning into something tangible. Bloody killjoys.

Ignore the naysayers. You have done bloody well. You are getting a dream off the ground, and I applaud you!

ooh happy! you are well on the way! massive respect and admiration. You are a Proper Writer! I haven't done any paid writing (yet) and yes I do feel like it is a furtive little secret until it's validated by bringing in the readies. For you it's no longer a fantassy, it's becoming a reality. They are just so smile and say nothing!

wtf's a 'proper' job anyway? something so deadly dull that the only thing you get out of it is a salary

fans steam coming out from ears
oh, and I don't tell people unless I really like them, just because of this reaction, spoken or unspoken
my parents were like this (don't do art, get a 'proper' job) and it riles me! can you tell?!

I have lots several clients who are writers, most of whom are doing well enough that it's financially worth their while to pay me to sort out their tax stuff. Of course it's a proper job!

However, DH's fmaily still regard me as "messing around at home" when I've been a self employed bookkeeper (so a "proper job" in most people's eyes) for over 7 years and have enough regular income to pay a huge chunk of the mortgage each month. I don't think you can win either way.

Course it's a proper job! (Especially if you've been commissioned!) People are just jealous.

I think it's jealousy too, or ignorance. ShrinkingViolet...nice to hear that several of your clients are writers.
Ninah...I have a friend who, at the age of 41, has just started a degree in fine art...her husband is so mad at her as it's not a 'proper' degree and will not support her in any way. Some people are such philistines.
With writing, family especially, don't seem to understand that you are working. I have between 9.30 and 3 to work, and invariably they will ring to chat, usually about nothing. And I know if I say 'sorry, have to go I'm working' or 'I have a deadline I need to meet' they think I'm being precious.
Teehee...I have deadlines!!! get me

fine art's an intensive degree and you are required to be reflective about your practice in a way that I'd say is quite uniquely rigourous, and encompasses philosophers and thinkers like Benjamin, Lacan ... not for the fainthearted. But not one that leads to an obvious job, either. Being a painter is really, really hard. I used to have a studio in an complex where there were loads of talented people, all struggling, all doing other things to keep afloat. But your friend isn't thinking of running away to a garrett, presumably. She should take her dh along to a lecture. He might be surprised!

Oh, stuff them Happy! I think some people are just jealous that they don't have the dedication to pursue their dreams and so have to be down on other people who do.

I also think that older generations are more inclined to think that 'creative' jobs aren't 'proper' as compared to the old favourites (law, accountancy, education, medicine etc.). My DP works in TV and is hugely respected in his field, has never been without interesting work in the last 12 years (despite being freelance) and has won awards. His mum though is still slightly ashamed that he hasn't got a 'proper' job, as compared to her friends' children!

If you love it and you can earn enough that you don't need to send your children up chimneys, go for it!

ah, chimneys. Now ds is nice and slim .. pulls on fingerless gloves and long Fagin dressing gown ...

LOL @ your MIL arti.
Ninah...at least the chimneys would be nice and warm at this time of year .

Congratulations happywithlife - I am very I have been writing on and off for a year, got about 70,000 words of a novel written but have no confidence whatsoever and am far too embarrassed to call myself a "writer". I am really struggling to finish it but it would be great to at least be able to say I wrote a novel, even if it is never published.

What is the website you are writing for?

Hey - and if it pays it's definitely a proper job!

Crikey stranded - 70,000 words is corking! We are all doing the NaNoWriMo 'write 50,000 words in November' thing at the moment and it is flipping hard. The temptation to just chuck it in and go and watch Holby City with some maltesers is immense.

Keep working on it, do - the satisfaction of just finishing it will be enormous. And as far as I can see, if you write, that makes you a writer. None of us have anything to be embarassed about - my Dad potters about in the garden and calls himself a gardener and no-one would think twice about that. I used to hide what I did in my spare time, writing, but now I do tell people; most people are pretty impressed that I do anything else with a small child and a job. And if it's all crap? So what, I love it - and it sounds like you do too.

There is an underlying truth to some of it -- I know (and have known from before she was published) a moderately successful writer who couldn't afford to give up her day job until her first two novels were selling well and she'd had the third accepted (and is still not exactly living a luxurious existence, and she only has to support herself so probably still couldn't support a family on what she's making from writing).

But there's a difference between maintaining a realistic view of the lot of a professional writer and taking out your ambitions and stomping all over them. "Nice little fantasy" indeed...

Thanks artifarti - I think I need to come on here more to get encouragement. I really need to crack on - it's been almost exactly a year since I started it and I am stuck!

HappyWithLife your comment about wanting to write for a long time but not having the confidence (although you do now) is telling. Many of our loved ones sad to say, have a view of us and like us to stay in our designated boxes. 'She's the funny one' 'She's the one who is always on a diet' and 'She's the one trying to be a writer' and when you actually get somewhere you've jumped out of your box and they have to reappraise you. It makes people very uncomfortable. For example I know of a few people who have successfully lost weight and find their friends and family sabotaging them left right and centre.

The other thing is if somebody succeeds at a difficult thing and getting your work accepted is HARD, then it pulls everyone else up short and they look at their own truncated ambitions and dreams. And because you've done it perhaps they have to admit that the only reason they didn't try harder wasn't because it was too hard, but they were lazy or too scared of failure or just didn't want it enough. It's much easier to sneer from the sidelines or imagine that only celebrities get published or you have to be related to a publisher to get publisher. Not true. Unknown people get published all the time. And they get published because they have worked hard and are very very good.

Frizzbonce - what intelligent and accurate observations. Those bloody boxes!

It's not only a proper job - it's a tough job but my god, when it goes well it is better than anything.

My friend - who is not a celebrity but a hard-working writer - has been picked up by Bloomsbury.

Word hard people - we are WRITERS.

Thank you Punkatheart And really pleased to hear about your friend - your non-celebrity friend being picked up by Bloomsbury. Proves the point really!