NDNs Lambeg drum

[Noisy82]

I'm in the North. I'm fairly new to an area and on the whole my new neighbours are fairly quiet on both sides, I never see them and they very much keep themselves to themselves which is grand by me. I can't imagine we're noisy either. I have a small child and we're both out all day from early and back at wee ones bedtime every day and I'm always mindful of the noise for neighbours.

My issue is that my new next-door neighbour on one side plays what I'm guessing by the sound is a Lambeg drum every day. It's never for very long maybe 20/30 minutes 3 or 4 times across the day but as you can imagine it's LOUD for a terraced house and it vibrates straight through the wall into my living room and kitchen. There's no room in the house where I can't hear it.

I understand the need to practice and that it's part of their heritage/cultural identity and I honestly don't mind the practice during the day even if I'm wfh, but when I'm putting my wee one to bed at 7 and this is starting at 8pm it's really annoying because sleep is precious in this house! They also have young children but must keep them up much later as I can't imagine they could sleep through it. I am kind of dreading summer because I'm guessing the practicing is going to pick up ahead of band season.

So I'm not sure how best to address this with them. I really don't want to create any issues with otherwise grand neighbours, and I'm very aware that it could be contentious because of the instrument being used and the cultural aspect. We've had no interaction at all to date to the point I don't even know what they look like so I can't gauge how reasonable they'd be.

Do I just let it go and put up with it or do I go round and say something? I hate confrontation and as I'm on my own with my child I really don't want to start something that could escalate. Especially since its not like the practice lasts a very long time. Or am I making a rod for my back ahead of the parades season and should say something now? We're hopefully only here for a year or two until I can get my divorce finalised and buy elsewhere.

I think it’ll go down like a lead balloon if you say anything, tbh 😬 If you’re only planning to be there a year I probably wouldn’t mention it

"that it's part of their heritage/cultural identity" you're not Irish then, am here wi' popcorn 😉

You would not be unreasonable to approach wrt your child's bedtime though, possibly with a 7pm cut off?

Given humanity, it may not go down well mind

I don’t understand why you think OP can’t be Irish @Freya1542?

I would want to ask politely OP. Given they have small children themselves they should be aware of the issues. But…I’d like to know if they were reasonable sort of people first, though I’m not sure how you’ll find that out. I’d also be worried about the noise increasing as we approach the summer.

purely because @Noisy82 stated

"that it's part of their heritage/cultural identity"

suggested to me that she is neither Irish nor of Irish heritage?

I just thought she wasn’t Unionist.

That's so funny you interpreted it that way! I just meant that this is obviously important to them if they're practicing daily and part of a band.

We actually have the same cultural background (affordable housing where i live tends not to be very mixed unfortunately) but I've never really felt much connection to mine at all. We were always taken away at certain times of year because as children we lived near an interface and there was always trouble so it's not something I grew up really identifying with even though as an adult I understand why it's so important to others on both sides of the metaphorical fence! I always felt kind of ... neutral?

This is hilarious... if only it sounded that good!!! I'm actually not quite sure if it's the dad or one of the older kids sometimes 😬

@Noisy82 and @Tooearlyfortea

I most humbly, stand corrected 🥁 🙉 .☘︎ ݁˖

I was wrong too, sorry @Noisy82!

It's totally fine its not like anyone said anything remotely offensive! You couldn't tell on an anonymous platform anyway!

It suggests to me she is either from a nationalist heritage or not local.

I am also 99.9% positive that the lambeg drum player is not Irish.

Edited to say - just read the op's update on her background. Apologies for making assumptions. I should really know better, particularly as the more recent census shows a big increase in people identifying as northern irish or northern irish plus irish/british rather than just Irish/British

Where do they keep an enormous Lambeg drum in a terraced house?!

No need to apologise I can totally see why it read that way and let's be honest I think everyone from here (if you are) have it subconsciously down to a fine art reading between the lines to identify each other even when we don't mean to! I think that's exactly where I fall, I feel very much Northern Irish and don't identify with British culture at all but also wouldn't describe myself as Irish as that isn't appropriate for me either given my family history and culture if that makes sense? I'm glad Northern Irish is becoming more mainstream on forms and things because I do think it better represents a lot of people who are from here.

It's a good question isn't it! They're huge drums!

I'm from the republic but have friends from NI and others from border counties south of the border so would be reasonably familiar with some of the nuances.

The whole Northern Irish identity thing is such an amazing sign of progress isn't it?

Be very careful.

They are almost certainly Orange Order & getting ready for this year's Marching Season.

And by the way - I hope that you have a Union Flag at the very least to hang out if "asked" to do so.

I understand your point but I will not be doing so, without going into any detail it wouldn't be appropriate for my line of work for me to do that either.

In fairness the area we live in now I really don't think we'd be asked. It's not very mixed but I know people who have lived here for years and they never do and have never been asked thankfully. It's ridiculous that people are put under pressure with these things.

@Noisy82 Understood.

It is a risk, however. A request to play more quietly (if possible with a lambeg!) may not go down well & potentially escalate into something more sinister.

My dad was RUC; an uncle UDR.