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Craicnet

If you can buy alcohol and cig's you don't need to burn runners.......

2 replies

alco · 18/02/2026 12:00

I went to Cuan Mhuire a few years ago. I am fairly blunt in my ways sometimes.

We were all chatting about unusual fire lighters - CM doesn't supply them, we had to get people to bring them in to us. They spoke of sugar, old toilet roll tubes, etc.

One woman said she used to burn old runners/ shoes, that it was great for getting the fire going.

I said that's terrible for the house, all the fumes/ toxins released from burning it. Not to mention the environment.

She accused me of having 'no idea what it is like to have cold children who need warmth' I didn't have DC at the time.

I asked her was she drinking/ smoking at the time. She was, but I was still the cow for pointing out that maybe she could have bought firelighters and one less drink. She was looking for sympathy for being so poor she needed to burn runners, but wasn't getting it from me.

I'm not the cow am I? I am sober years now but only getting therapy for my complete lack of self esteem so things like this sometimes circle my head.

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HowardTJMoon · 18/02/2026 12:34

Of course it's insane for her to rationalise burning shoes for heat because she was so poor, while at the same time spending money on alcohol and cigarettes.

But addictions aren't about making sane choices, they're more complex, powerful and damaging than that. Plus if you met her in treatment then it's likely that even if she was sober, she may well have had a way to go before being robust enough in her recovery to be able to clearly view her past mistakes without getting defensive about it.

If she's been reliably sober since then and you could ask her today she might give you a different answer. Or she might not. Who knows? But you ruminating on it now won't change the bad choices she made or the answer she gave you back then. Her journey is hers. Your journey is yours. Let it go.

alco · 18/02/2026 12:57

@HowardTJMoon I know ruminating won't change it. I just needed someone external to say I wasn't wrong. It just stuck with me to be accused like that. It is a 'me problem' that things stick in my head.

I can imagine you have your own experiences, I think I recognise your username.

Believe me I know far too well that addiction does not lead to sane choices. Just how complex it all is. And the damage that was done by me (mostly to me) and damage done to me (mostly by adults who prioritised alcohol) it is immense

Alcohol has had a profound and life long impact on my life. From the cradle, but I am working so hard to make sure it doesn't tuck me into my grave

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