Should I bring food/drink to a wake

[Atlantic252]

My BF's mam had passed away - we are in the mid-west but this will be my first wake in a house - our family have always done them in the funeral home.

Just wondering if there is any etiquette on bringing something to the wake - food/drink maybe? I'm godmother to one of the DGC but not family and I haven't spoken directly to my BF yet.

I know they will probably have it all in hand so caught between wanting to help and overstepping.

I assume you're in the US so etiquette will be different from here in UK, but I just wanted to send condolences x

When my dm died we had her wake at home..presume you are in lreland. Some neighbours and friends dropped in cakes/ buns. I have gone to lots of wakes and never brought anything as l am useless at baking etc. To be honest l would have no idea who brought anything. So really if it's your thing do it but if not don't worry just call in and be there for your friend now and when it's all over.

I have been to plenty and now normally bring a bottle of whiskey, lemons and cloves (for hot whiskey), I also bring some milk, teaspoons and dishtowels. I was at a wake once and a young man brought these with him when he came. They came in so handy. We had loads and loads of food that we had no where to put it.

Speak to your friend before going to the wake if possible, ask if they need anything. Some families will get food delivered (sandwiches, cake, etc) others will have it provided by neighbours/family. Spare chairs, delph, cutlery can be needed. Our local GAA were great at providing these items along with a few burco boilers, large tea and coffee pots. If you are expecting a large crowd (over 200 for the rosary at my mother's wake) some outdoor shelter may be needed. It's a wonderful comforting tradition here in Ireland and the care, consideration and concern shown by so many really helped us. People stayed late chatting and reminiscing and I heard wonderful stories about my mother as a young person. There is no particular need for you to bring anything, many will turn up to pay their respects but if you want to bring something just ask your friend what they need.

Thank you all - sorry I just put this in Craicnet and didn't think to say I was in Ireland 🤦‍♀️.

There are great ideas here - I will take whiskey for sure. I'll try to talk to her tomorrow to see if they need anything. Thanks again.

I would have thought mid west of Ireland.

Yes I would bring some food - apple tarts and cream. Perhaps some chocolate biscuit cake / millionaires shortbread type thing too. Sadly they wouldn't be home made by me as my apple tarts are a disaster..