BeLonG To in school

[WhitethornWildrose]

I went to a meeting in DD's school last week and, as part of the information given, they mentioned that BeLonG To would be working with the school. It was framed very positively and they said that we were lucky to get the opportunity, and were one of a small number of schools selected.
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I looked them up afterwards and they seem to be a group working in support of LGBTQ+. This I am fine with, consider myself a liberal and support inclusion for all BUT, that said, I have some reservations about the way trans ideology is being pushed without much thought or regard for the impact this might have on women in particular.

Does anyone know anything more about this group and what they're doing in the schools? What will they be telling the students? Is it all positive as the school implied? I can ask for clarification with the school too, of course, but DD has only just joined and I don't really want to cause issues for her there without good reason. Also don't want the staff to think I'm a bigot or anything.

Thanks for your help.

I should have said that this is second level. DD has just started in 1st year.

Hello @WhitethornWildrose I don't know anything about the programme, but I would be asking to find out more. Are parents able to look up the programme or view the materials in advance or is it a series of talks, I wonder.

Thank you very much @IsFuzzyBeagMise

I haven't seen that much online regarding their schools' programme so far, though I did see that some of their previous work at a school level in Wicklow has been supported by TENI, who come across as quite militant to me, and this makes me a bit worried. I guess I'll have to ask, but I was hoping someone might have some experience so I'd know a little before enquiring. We're just in the door at the school too, which makes it harder.

I know. I understand your point of view.

Come over to the feminism board, there’s been questions & answers on Belong to

Thanks @VaddaABeetch.

As far as I can see, nothing has happened. You're concerned that something bad might happen. If something bad happens, you know how to contact the school. But nothing has happened. So why would you contact the school...?

I'd like to have some idea what they're going to be telling DD and her classmates. The curriculum for most subjects is available online but this is an unknown.

Some materials produced and used in schools by BelongTo has been analysed on Twitter and elsewhere. I haven't got the links right now but I might be able to find them later.

One point of contention I remember was their definition of lesbian along the lines of "MAINLY attracted to women" (my emphasis). This erases real homosexuality which is exclusive attraction to the same sex.

Another thing was their guidance for schools on overnight accommodation on trips - they advocate for full trans inclusion in the sense of allowing teenagers of the opposite sex to share sleeping accommodation - obviously many parents will see this as madness.

As you have already worked out, they do seem to share a party line with TENI on many issues, make of that what you will.

This is one of the twitter threads I'd seen before

https://twitter.com/xx_gender/status/1325833799998042114?s=20&t=_P-d2KkHFpzN3joDS1oMIA

https://www.belongto.org/wp-content/uploads/2021/10/15392_BelongTo_Toolkit_V4.pdf

Here's their 2021 Toolkit for their Stand Up Week.
I haven't checked yet whether they have revised any of the things they were criticized for.

When an organization somehow makes it clear to a school, or a school makes it clear to parents, that they have been given a rare opportunity that not everyone gets, it's time to wake up and smell the snake oil.

This is how cults operate - they tell you you're the chosen one and before long you're eating out of their hands.

Thanks so much for the information and those links @SecondRow, much appreciated. I'm concerned about it all I have to say. The drive to promote inclusion in society is laudable, but the fact that it seems to be driven by certain groups, who are obviously going to have their own agenda, is far from ideal. It appears there's a lack of thought about how the changes are impacting on other groups and on schools and society as a whole. Then there's name calling by some if you break the new rules. A lot more thought and oversight is needed imho.

Hi @WhitethornWildrose , I agree this is very much worth looking into, ideally before they come into your school!

Here's a letter published in the Sunday Independent the other day - BelongTo in their own words.

They are state funded and obviously consider themselves THE authority on how to support LGBT youth. But I do question how supported you would feel if, say, you were a teen just coming to terms with realising you are exclusively same sex attracted, gay or lesbian as we used to say 🙄

They define "gay" in those 2021 materials above as same GENDER attracted. That means to people of both sexes. I would have a problem with this being taught to my children. There is immense pressure on young people to be inclusive, where are they being supported to draw their own boundaries around their sexuality?

Yes, I noticed that the term gender was being used in two ways in the links you posted.

Firstly, as a synonym for sex and, secondly, to mean your inner identity, as it were.
In the past, the word gender was someimes used as a polite euphemism instead of the word sex (though I remember reading somewhere that its usage should really be restricted to language eg gendered nouns in some languages).
Now that there seems to be a new definition for gender, I don't think it should be used as an alternative word for sex any more. It's all very confused. Are BeLonG To just getting their words mixed up, or is it worse and they don't really properly recognise homosexuality anymore?

Just to be clear, I am in favour of supports for LGBTQ+ teens in schools, of course I am. But I just don't want things becoming more confused. I want everyone to be supported at school. A friend's young teen has been hassled at (a different) school for accidentally using the wrong pronoun for someone on one occasion. It just seems to be the way society is changing at the moment unfortunately, and I don't think the wider issues are being addressed properly.

Are BeLonG To just getting their words mixed up, or is it worse and they don't really properly recognise homosexuality anymore?

I'm going to go out on a limb and predict that neither they, nor the school, will give you a straight (no pun intended) answer on that. They will repeat that they are there to support ALL LGBTQ youth - yes, great - but won't want to get down to the nitty gritty of who does the L include and who the G.

It begs the question whether these definitions which erase homosexuality are also endorsed by the Dept. of Education and the Dept. of Children, Equalities and Disability.

You can also point out to the school that the material goes against the basic safeguarding training teachers receive via Tulsa and their Children First and are expected to adhere to as mandated people.

The best approach is pointing out the safeguarding issues

Thanks @TakingTheLowRoad @Carriemac How does this sort of course go against the teachers' basic safeguarding training?

Recommending that children share sleeping accommodation on trips on the basis of their self-declared gender identity rather than their sex contravenes the most basic of safe-guarding.

They have also issued advice that schools should not necessarily tell parents if a child declares a gender identity in school. AFAIK there are a variety of questions about that ethically and possibly legally though maybe that's not safe-guarding.

Thank you @3timeslucky. It's a single-sex school though, so shared accommodation on trips wouldn't be an issue in this case.

All you can do is read the BeLT materials and decide if you're ok with their approach (whether it be advocating secrecy, mixed bathrooms/changing rooms/accommodation, redefining same sex attraction etc etc). If there are issues you're not comfortable with including those you outlined in your opening post, then talk to the school about them.

I'm concerned about this, having received a message from our school to say that they are now hoping to achieve the "BelongTo Quality Mark" which they say is "a step above their current status as a Safe & Supportive School" There was a questionnaire to complete online, which I did, but there wasn't really any way of highlighting concerns, you selected the answer to each question on a 'don't know' up to 'fully agree' scale and they were all quite biased about how wonderful the programme is. I did use a section at the end to highlight my concerns but I doubt it will make any difference. It's a mixed school. I'm worried.