where has the credit gone?

[winterblues25]

I’ve usually never had a problem being accepted for credit but just tried to increase my credit limit on my card recently and was refused, new balance transfer card and loan applications refused, credit score good, even the balance transfer offers on my credit card which I’ve had for years have been withdrawn??

Does the increase in the credit interest rate not knock you a bit sick?
I know you are defending your choices but it’s a no brainer to me that you need to prioritise clearing this debt.

Good Lord. It’s 2026 FFS.

When my father misbehaved, he had to go out and “choose his own switch” for my grandfather to beat him with. Shall we suggest this to OP?

My grandmother went out to their chicken coop, decapitated a chicken, and plucked its feathers every time they ate chicken. Should we suggest this to OP?

On road trips, I bounced around the backseat—lying wherever I wanted, without a car seat or a safety belt. Should we suggest this for OP’s children?

This isn’t a race to the bottom. We shouldn’t aspire to emulate the absolute worst things from our childhoods. Things were shit in the past. We get it.

Can I ask why you dont just do this and get rid of the debt?

As you said it affects you when you remortgage and now the offers are gone, it makes sense just to get rid

Is your DH putting extra into his pension to go under 100K to get childcare hours?
Otherwise I just dont understand why you would struggle on essentials but pay into pension

You need to take your head out of the sand. Why are you saying debt isn't a problem. You are now paying astronomical rates of interest. If thats not a problem I don't know what is. Stop running up debt and make an effort to pay off what you owe.

Right. This makes no sense at all! You state here that you have available credit? Savings? And assets you could liquidate quickly? Yet you want to keep paying minimum on the most expensive loans you could ever have? And they will be adding on 24% interest on them all the time? That is bonkers. Just use some of your savings then to pay off the credit cards and cut them up then!

This is important for you to understand OP. 'they' are not choking credit for everyone... You need to see that this is happening to you specifically for a reason

You are a much much kinder person than me @winterblues25 . I couldn’t stand watching much needed money go to supporting uni kids that aren’t mine. I want every penny to go to my children. For them now and what’s spare… for their future. Hence why I’d be a thoroughly shit step mother!

@YourPoliteLeader that is 100% part of what you buy into though, when you marry a person who already has dc. Well, if you marry a decent person who has dc. That those dc already exist and a decent parent will do what they can to support them as they would have done had they not split from the co-parent. That commitment is there, long before they met their 2nd wife.

We’ve not avoided this by chasing cheap credit, we’ve made a very conscious decision to make the most of cheap credit so we can optimise our pension contributions. Liquidating assets to clear debt would be a worst case scenario. We have more than our house equity available btw. How are we heading towards insolvency when we are in a much better overall financial situation than we were 5 years ago let alone 10 years ago,

They are lovely DSC and I suppose I would maybe feel differently if my children were going without but good fortune in terms being able to earn good incomes, a good relationship, combined with careful budgeting and shopping around has meant we are all happy and have what we need

Are you managing to save for your children?

This income plus 5 kids plus debt plus no credit available - are you stressed about it? Or fairly relaxed?

What does it mean that you won’t be able to buy that you would have bought if the bank was willing to lend?

Op you got shitty because you are getting responses you don't like because you keep changing details. At the beginning the salary waa 3900 combined (with apparently high earner on 2800thp) now suddenly it's sometimes 5000. You have large debt, you don't have large debt. You overpay, you are putting day to day basics on cards to live.

It's one or the other. No wonder replies are all over the place when your info is.
You can't get shitty at people when you provide confusing or conflicting info.

In short, finance providers decided you are now bigger risk and as much as you seem to hope it's case for everyone, it isn't.

Brace yourself

Yes very definitely, DH clear commitment to his existing children was part of what attracted me to him in the first place. Just like when thinking about having 2nd 3rd,4th, 5th children with the same partner you do consider what overall impact that may have on the older children and ensure they will still have what they need

Oh I agree

and it’s why I could never blend families with a man with children. The very idea of money that could be channeled towards my children and their opportunities and future going to other children…. I just couldn’t face it. I never will. And no poor child will ever thankfully have me as a step mum.

The fact the bank is not giving you credit… what does it exactly mean you can no longer but that you’d like to have been able to?

Fairly relaxed, just like to be able to know how the landscape is so can plan accordingly, unless something changes drastically then should be able to still buy my children decent clothes, food, pay for swimming lessons, school trips etc. DH may consolidate, otherwise we’ll perhaps just not put so much into pensions for the moment until DSC finish uni, we’ve put a fair amount in them so not really worried we’re behind the curve

£3900 averaged through the year, we can’t be the only couple who have fluctuating monthly incomes? If we’re working certain shifts or DH on certain projects then the pay can be more than £3900, on a completely flat month our take home would be less but if you keep the £3900 figure in your head than that would be quite accurate

p.s. To explain further, e.g on a flat month then I’d pay the minimum payments and put some things on the credit card but other months we put nothing on the credit card and over pay by whatever is spare, top up our emergency fund etc.

You said you needed the credit for “necessary” items. Like what?

Do you manage to go on holidays?

Ok so savings are into pensions rather than anything for the children? I guess it’s got to be one or the other and pensions certainly sensible!

I just can't understand thinking you're in a great financial position but you can't get by without putting daily living costs on a credit card 🥲

we have a lot of broke months,

I don’t use credit to buy luxuries or holidays, just the everyday essentials,

that doesn’t sound like “managing” to me?

Plenty of people have fluctuating incomes…we do if we do overtime…BUT…my budgeting is done off base pay only. Extra is put into savings.

No holidays recently as income is as reduced last year due to being on maternity leave but we did have a UK caravan holiday a couple of years ago when our 6 year had just started school and childcare costs had reduced and we both felt had enough time to take on extra work/overtime

again this is my point…it’s a false economy…stop using it. Pay it off and then on the months you have extra you can save!!