Worried about money

[Sassybees]

Sorry for unloading. My ex will stop paying maintenance for my older son soon as he is 18 and going to uni. This on top of my mortgage payments doubling, is going to leave myself and my 8 year old, very little to live on. After all bills, we will have £650pm. This has to cover food, petrol, clothing, school trips, birthdays, car and house maintenance, plus all the other life expenses. I'm so worried and am struggling to sleep because of it.
Do you think we will survive on this amount?
I work almost full time and get a small top up from UC.

You may qualify for more UC help once your maintenance stops. I work in social housing and it's often the single parents who qualify for help. They just won't be able to help towards housing costs as you're a homeowner but it's worth seeing what additional support you might be entitled to. Try this website:- www.entitledto.co.uk/benefits-calculator/Intro/Home?cid=bce279b5-9215-4bd0-98ba-e800642ccf45

I don’t think Maintenance is considered for benefit calculations.
What about a lodger/ air B and B?
You ideally need to find a way to increase income.

I don't like to mention this but have you accounted for perhaps the Uc stopping altogether when your eldest drops off the claim ? Your youngest child would then get the higher child rate though as long as born before April 2017.
Can your eldest look for work this summer so that he maybe has some experience under his belt ? I'm sure he will probably get full student loan but since two of ours are at Uni at the same time and can't find jobs it has been difficult. I would encourage him to try to find a job with a chain like macDonalds or similar where he can work whilst away at Uni and at home then he can contribute a bit in the holidays.
I hope at least his dad may continue some support through UNi as there are so many costs and loans often barely cover accommodation and basics.
Could you see if you could increase the mortgage term?

Op's UC will drop. maintenance does not affect Uc in any way and she will lose the eldest child off the claim, thus reducing her total Uc award.

Yes my UC and child benefit will also drop. I've accounted for this in my calculations.
I've extended my mortgage term to the maximum, so that can't be reduced anymore.
There is an option to receive some help from UC with my mortgage payments, but they charge interest, so I really want to avoid it.
My food bill will be reduced dramatically when my teenager leaves, as he eats a lot; and a lot of meat. Luckily my 8 year old and I are not big eaters, so hopefully I might get by on £250pm on food, which will leave us £400 for all the other stuff. This makes my feel like it might just be doable. But money just seems to disappear, and what do I do if one of my appliances breaks, or I get a driving fine, or if my son needs new shoes etc..

I can't get a lodger, as my 18 year old's bedroom is an unofficial loft room, without a door, that you can barely stand up in

Well done for thinking about this well in advance.

I think you probably can get by on the amount you have left but you'd have to be very careful to budget and build up an emergency fund.

Drive legally and you won't get a driving fine.

Have you ruthlessly reviewed your expenses?
Cancelled any unnecessary subscriptions, reduced the cost of broadband, mobile costs etc? If not, look at the budgeting advice on Moneysavingexpert.com and get the weekly newsletter for ongoing tips on making your money go further.

is it possible to work more or get a higher paying job? Even something like babysitting, cleaning or restaurant work when the 8 YO is with their father?

Is there light at the end of the tunnel eg wraparound care costs for the 8 YO that will drop when they're (nearly) secondary school age? Will the maintenance you get for your younger child be at least the recommended minimum?

Is downsizing or moving to a cheaper area an option if you're likely to struggle long term?

But don't fall into the trap when the 8 YO is a teen that they 'need to eat a lot of meat' because they don't and its awful seeing so many mothers on here desperately trying to find money out of thin air to fill bottomless pits with premium food at the expense of their own diet and mental health. If they're hungry they can eat eggs, pasta, baked potatoes, beans etc, not piles of meat.

Use these next few months to get used to living on your new budget and save the difference to start building up an emergency fund, as long as you provide 3 good meals a day your DS will need to fund his own food. Has your DS got a part time job, if not this is definitely something that needs encouraging once A-Levels are finished.

The figures you give are doable but it will be tight for any extras. You need to look at reducing your fixed costs, increasing your primary income and picking up a second income. Most of the time cutting back is not enough and only increasing your income will actually make any real difference.

The moneysaving expert forums are an excellent resource to use, to help build your emergency fund a bit quicker look at doing bank switches, using cashback sites and completing surveys. Prolific is the only survey site I use and can make £10-£15 a month without much effort, doesn't sound like a lot but it pays my mobile bill for the month!

Is downsizing an option, or extend your mortgage term for more years? I’d hope your 18 YO has been working the last few years as well.

The figure should be doable if you have a strict budget. What about something like:

Food: 280 (70 per week)
Petrol: 50
Clothing and school trips: 80 (do you need to buy clothes monthly? If not this can be accumulated for when you both need clothes, shoes etc)
Misc e.g. trips out on weekends: 80
Saving each month (until something breaks or you need to pay car tax, insurance etc): 100
Savings for Xmas, birthdays etc: 60
= 650 per month

If you budget you should be ok 🌺

I think you need to increase yor income

How about asking for a pay rise and more responsibilities at work?