Work more, or move?

[rainbowduplo]

Looking for opinions and ideas on how we can organise our family lives and finances better (me, DS, DS5 and DD2).

DH works full time, we live on his salary. He's usually out from 8am-6pm. Minimal annual leave entitlement. I WFH 16 hours in a very flexible job which means I cover pick ups, drop offs, playdates, swimming lessons etc. During term times DD goes to childcare 2 days a week and I work. During the holidays I fit my hours in during the evenings so I'm around with the kids. Historically my salary = the childcare bill. We've been counting down to DD getting free hours, but the cost of living crises is already swallowing that extra money. We've been using savings to get by until her funding kicked in, and they're basically gone. We have no family. I've asked about increasing my hours but it isn't an option.

We're just about making ends meet having cut back across the board (swimming lessons are the last standing luxury and even they're on the chopping block), and feel like we need to make a change. The plan was for me to do this job until DD is 5, and then I'd go back to work FT. But we hadn't factored in the cost of living crises which is just making everything a squeeze. So wondering if we should be making a change now rather than scrimping for the next 3 years, and maybe beyond. But the solutions all seem to have problems attached. Perhaps you've been in a similar boat and can offer your experience.

The options we've come up with so far are:

1. I go back to FT work - feasibly I double my salary doing this. But we worked out that by the time we'd increased the childcare for DD, and paid for breakfast club, after school club, holiday clubs for DS that we'd take home something like an additional £150-200 per month. When you consider i'd be working working an extra 21 hours a week it works out that I'd be making £2.50 an hour. DD would have to change settings to one which is much less convenient to get to. Plus losing all the perks of WFH PT (time to do chores during the week etc so keep the weekends free for family time). I've no idea how to get a higher paid job. However, by getting on the ladder now it's likely that in the years to come my salary will increase incrementally, plus paying into pension etc, so there are longer term benefits to working more.
2. I get a second job - would need to be evenings and weekends, which again means much less time with the kids. Also not sure how this would work in the holidays as I basically work my current hours in the evenings then already. However, could work?! I've found one flexible job, maybe there's another!
3. Move to a cheaper area of the country. We live in a relatively affluent area and have quite a bit of equity in our house (but don't want to remortgage right now as we did it just before the interest rates went nuts and are keen to keep it as low as possible). If we moved to a significantly cheaper house, porting the mortgage, we'd gain a lump sum of money which we could use to pay off various debts, overpay on the mortgage (shortening the term) and use for day to day spends. Cost of living would be less overall, but our jobs are remote so our income wouldn't change. Seems like we'd be getting a better quality of life in the long run, though a huge upheaval in the short term.

DH is leaning heavily towards option 3. Then I can keep being around with the smalls for another few years until DD is established in school and old enough to be able to go to holiday clubs etc when needed (most start from age 5 around here, and that's not even for a full day). I'm struggling to disagree with him, but I love our life here so just want to make sure we've thought about everything before making such a huge leap. Trying to consider all the pros and cons of each option.

What would you do? Is there a 4th option I've not worked out yet?

thanks @Jellycatspyjamas tbf Scotland is off the list. Houses are mega cheap but it was only on there flippantly.

I am confused about your calculations. If you would be working 21 hours extra a week for £150-200 would that not equate to 1,092 additional annual hours , so benefit would only be £1.65-£2.20 an hour. Or do you not work term time? 21 x 52 = 1092 additional hours for an additional £1800-2400 per annum?

After tax even less! Potentially £1.45 per hour for the additional 21 hours?

Or do you mean £150-200 extra a week not month. How did you calculate the 21 hours you could earn £2.50 an hour?

You can find one in Scotland for much less!

@Scottishshortbread11877 the take home pay is more than that. But by the time we'd factored £15 a day for before and after school clubs for DS, clubs during school holidays, switching DD from 2 days a week term time only childcare to full time, year round childcare it basically meant that the additional money we would have in our banks at the end of each month was about £200. So an additional £2400 a year, but doubling my working hours, seeing the kids a whole lot less, losing family time on weekends because the chores I do mid week would shift. Weighing up the benefits vs the compromises.

Hi @rainbowduplo you talk about the North East, have you considered North West, Lancashire way? Lovely countryside and coast and cheaper generally, you may get your Tynemouth house and not dissimilar location for a price you find palatable.
(Of course there are areas of deprivation: I would avoid Blackpool, but Lancaster/Morecambe/Lytham may be worth a look? Also, regarding NE, Middlesbrough is quite a depressed area, I had a friend from the area who described it as 'a good place to get out of'!)

I think you are being short-term in your thinking. I certainly wouldn’t move if I loved where I lived. Do you have friends where you are?
also, if you stay in your area and manage the mortgage, you will have a big asset.l eventually which is a big safety net.
I would personally work FT, find good childcare and get my career properly going. Before you know it, the children will be at school with good and affordable wraparound childcare, you can take unpaid parental leave for 36 weeks until they are 18 if you want to use that for school holidays and you will have far more money than you do now once they are in school.
I’ve been where you are, where everything is spent in bills etc, but it does change and very quickly as they get older. Keep a FT job going and you will earn a decent amount over your lifetime with a house worth far more than you thought

Hi OP,
How about becoming a childminder just until all your children are all in school - when you could go back to full time work if you want to.

Minding one or two children even part time would make a huge difference. You could continue to work in the evenings/weekends at your current job if the children were full time or try to sync the nursery days of the children's 15/30 hours with your own children's.

https://earlyyearscareers.campaign.gov.uk/working-in-childcare-and-early-years/become-a-childminder/

To add I would try not to give up a life you love for a short term problem - which is the cost of childcare for you to work until your children are in school.

Alternatively is there any scope for moving to a cheaper property in your own area. A flat maybe?

How much of the problem is your debt? What are you currently paying each month towards your debt (excluding mortgage)?

If you paid off all debt except mortgage, would you have enough income to live on in your current house and jobs?

If so why don't you both attack the debt hard now by temporarily working extra hours/ extra jobs?