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Cost of living

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Original poster

Cost of living help!

56 replies

Michele99 · 27/09/2023 23:12

I’m not sure what I need from this but I just really don’t know where to turn!
Myself and my partner own our house and have 4 children aged between 2 and 15. We managed just fine when we decided to have our daughter and bought our home when she was born.
The world has now completely messed things up and we can barely make ends meet between the cost of our shopping bill, utility bills, fuel and the mortgage. It really is unbearable. I stay at home with the youngest children as it costs too much for nursery and childminders so I would be working for no reason. Also my partner works in agriculture so we are unable to work around his hours for me to bring in an income.
My partner earns a decent wage and things were fine before everything started going up in price! The mortgage payments will be going up early next year too. I genuinely don’t know where to turn or what to do because it just seems every single penny goes on bills and living costs! This is never going to end and I just don’t know what else to do to make things easier! 😢

OP posts:
AutumnColours9 · 29/09/2023 21:12

I'm a bit cynical when people say wages are going up..

LadyLolaRuben · 29/09/2023 21:15

Have you thought about becoming a child minder if you already have experience with children? You can be working from and looking after your little one at the same time

CrazyHamsterLady · 30/09/2023 00:53

I recently finished a temp contract, working from home. It was the easiest thing I’ve ever done and no qualifications were needed. I only stopped as I finally got a start date for my new permanent job. Get yourself registered with lots of employment agencies, there will definitely be something out there for you. If you’re happy to do temping, you can often start really quickly. The job I had, you could have easily done it with a child there. It was data entry and I just chose my start and finish times. Beauty of being the temp!

roundcork · 30/09/2023 13:18

This reply has been withdrawn

This has been withdrawn by MNHQ at the request of the user.

Decafflatteplease · 30/09/2023 18:52

We also have 4 children on one wage and flip me it's hard!

I sell on vinted quite a bit which bring in a bit of money, and the Asda essential range as a pp mentioned is great!

Gymmum82 · 30/09/2023 18:57

You need to get a job. Either set up as a childminder or your 15 year old will have to mind the children while you leave for work before your partner gets home then you can work nights as a carer or something. You cannot sustain a home on one income anymore unless you earn megabucks

CassieRole · 30/09/2023 18:59

If you’ve always worked in care or childcare set up as a childminder. Always a huge call for them in rural areas.

YellowRosesWithRedTips · 30/09/2023 19:12

Are you sure you wouldn’t be eligible for UC if you worked and claimed the childcare element of UC? With the standard element, the max childcare element and 1 child element (depending on DC’s ages you may be eligible for child elements for DC2&3) DH would need to be earning more than £5k pm to not be eligible.

Snugglewuggle25 · 15/10/2023 20:24

Have you ever thought of working in a school?? Teaching Assistant or as a lunchtime organiser for few hours a day....or even in the school canteen. You would also get the school holidays off with your kids too. Worth a try??

oiltrader · 16/10/2023 08:23

CassieRole · 30/09/2023 18:59

If you’ve always worked in care or childcare set up as a childminder. Always a huge call for them in rural areas.

there will be insurance costs x

RaisinsOfMildAnnoyance · 16/10/2023 08:45

Look at charities who support vulnerable members of the population, they often need people who have safeguarding knowledge. I know there are differences depending on age, but I would say that's a transferable skill.

Working from home looks like your only option, and if you get tour foot in the door somewhere you may end up building a career for yourself as a result.

Speak to your mortgage provider about the Charter options?

It's really rough for families in your situation, I hope you find a solution.

TheWayTheLightFalls · 16/10/2023 08:54

What do you do @cbuew9 ?

cbuew9 · 16/10/2023 17:30

TheWayTheLightFalls · 16/10/2023 08:54

What do you do @cbuew9 ?

I'm in administration, let's say Accounts & HR

Anna8089 · 11/11/2023 23:04

30 degree wash. Please don't.

galletti · 27/11/2023 19:41

OP Take the helpful advice on here and ignore the mean girls

LegendsBeyond · 27/11/2023 19:46

4 kids & 1 income just doesn’t work unless the one income is very high. You need to look for work you can do from home in the evenings. Most households have 2 parents working full time.

Decafflatteplease · 28/11/2023 06:49

We have 4 children on one (not high) salary. We spend a lot of time at cheap activities like the woods, park etc. we have an annual swim pass which we get alot of use from. Live in a doer upper house, not very fussed about the latest technology etc, we live quite a simple life and are happy 🙂

JenniferJupiterVenusandMars · 28/11/2023 07:26

I was in a similar situation when our DCs were young, I did nights as a nurse, you could do so as a care assistant or whatever they’re called now.
I worked alternate nights, didn’t sleep during the day. Very tough but absolutely no alternative.

MariaLuna · 28/11/2023 07:45

Sorry you're going through this.

But you decided to have 4 kids.

My sister worked even though childcare took most of her salary.

You need to work to build up your pension. The kids will have left home by then.

Caterina99 · 03/12/2023 11:26

I live in a rural area where most of the jobs are agricultural and I see this a lot.

To be honest it seems that most people manage because they have family help with childcare and so the mum is able to work.

My friend is in a very similar boat to you, farmer DH, 4 kids from teen to toddler. Toddler is now 3 and at the school nursery so she works at the primary school as a TA. Another friend works at a private nursery and is able to take her toddler with her (and presumably gets money off his fees).

Agree our area is also desperate for childminders, but of course that requires you to have the appropriate house and insurance etc etc I assume.

greyhairnomore · 03/12/2023 12:06

@Michele99 could you train and register as a childminder ?

Theoldwoman · 03/12/2023 13:54

You say you own your home but you have a mortgage?

caringcarer · 03/12/2023 14:59

Even if 95 percent of your wage would be going to nursery and childminders you would still be better off working as you'd be paying into your pension and so would your employer. If you don't pay a pension now you will have a miserable retirement. It seems a long way in the future but time flies. In addition if you have long gaps on your CV it will be harder for you to get a job when your kids are all in school.

Caffeineislife · 03/12/2023 15:53

Could you try doing an ironing service? One of the mum's at playgroup started one in September in order to pay for xmas and also COL and she's really popular. She irons around her DC so during schooltime around toddlers naps and in the evening. She charges £15 a level basket and then she either drops at yours for an extra £1 or you collect from her. Myself and a few mum's drop the basket to her at playgroup and then she drops them back to us.

Depending on where you are she tends to drop as part of school run or shopping run.

She put a post up on the local Facebook the other week and she was inundated with requests. Not just mum's but lots of elderly people and also people caring for elderly relatives.

Debtfreegoals · 24/12/2023 09:16

I had 2 children aged 1 and 2 and I had to go back to work as my husbands full time work didn’t cover enough. I work part time and so glad I did it tbh! From around April I believe you will be able to get 15 hours free childcare so if you could put up with a few months of footing the childcare bill for a part time job - that may be a good option.

hope things improve OP.