Frugal Friends Fearlessly Facing February.

[needastrongoneagain]

Thought I'd start the new thread. Been ages since I started a thread!

£14 Sainsbury’s
must do a big shop

Fallen off the wagon a little. Not excessive pointless spending, but pre-buying some food for DS1's 16th birthday. He wants a family party shashlick (marinated lamb on a meat skewer, cooked over hot coals) and lamb costs a fortune. You need to use lamb legs which cost a fortune. Balancing it out with some chicken thigh shashlick as well but the cost of them has risen as well. And we have quite an extended family which will be fun but will cost me a lot.

The cost of groceries generally is enough to make me cry at the moment....

Combined with the horrible feeling that I may never save enough to buy more than a tiny flat is depressing. Being in my 50s very few banks will lend to me anyway, and those that will either will offer a 15 year loan or I have to show an exit strategy, ie. way to pay it off when I retire/stop working.... bye bye superannuation (private pension). Even that might not be enough.

If I want to buy where I am now, prices are around $600-$700 k and I can borrow around $300 k on my salary. If I keep strictly to my saving budget I can save $28k a year while living rent free.

At that rate I need at least 10 years to save. I MIGHT get around $100k in inheritance but at that point will either have to buy or rent as an living in the granny flat at my DM's.

I'm seriously screwed (at times like this I feel like making a voodoo doll of my exH and sticking pins in it, the fucker completely destroyed me financially!!)

So I need to think of a side hustle to earn some extra money. But I need work's permission if it's another job. No space for eBay selling (and tax office here keep an eye on those accounts anyway). I've done matched betting before so might do a bit of that again. Will see.

Sorry for the moan. At times it all feels too much, but I know I have to keep going. Better a small flat than having to rent on a pension or being homeless/living out of a car like so many are having to do at the moment with the housing crisis going on here in Australia.

orderofthekookaburra that sounds hard. Ive resigned myself to the fact we will never own our own home.

Are you creative at all? Could you sell on etsy?

I've been listing alot of stuff on vinted right now, so far just clothes, toys but also video games. Made about £500 this last year just selling stuff we don't need around the house. Surely you can't get taxed selling on your own belongings?

@SootspriteSearcher - I don't have lots of personal belongings to get rid of. I did a ridiculously large cull when I moved from UK to Australia 4 years ago, and then another cull moving interstate a year ago. I've been very careful with spending so haven't accumulated much stuff. Which is great in and of itself of course!

But it's tough saving $1200 a fortnight from my pay. And rent in our area is just shy of that. Let alone how high it will be when I actually retire. I keep going onto calculation sites to work out my retirement income and as long as I don't have to pay rent it will be 'enough' although not amazing by any stretch of the imagination.

I promised DS2 that regardless of what happened we would stay in the area until he finished high school, which is 4 1/2 years away.

I don't currently get any child support from my ex, although that might change soon, but it will probably only be around $30-$40 a month so not exactly riches..!!

£2.50 on a cup of tea 😒 I was in a work meeting and there was no way of getting a hot drink other than the extortionate m&s cafe.

£12 parking - also extortionate but at least I can claim it back through expenses.

Hi everyone,

another busy week at work. I'm off tomorrow for St. Patrick's Day which very conveniently falls on a Friday this year. Not planning anything special for the day. I might have a drink or two at home tomorrow night but that depends on DD's plans and if I have to pick her up from somewhere.

I'm meeting two friends for coffee on Saturday morning. Looking forward to it and it shouldn't be too expensive - just cake and a coffee. Then the rugby on Saturday evening - hoping England don't throw a spanner in the works.

DD is working on Mother's Day so I told her we'll celebrate it some other time when she has a day off.

Trying not to dwell too much on yet another interest rate rise .

Sorry to hear about your fall Wolf.

life I'm so sorry to hear about all of your unplanned expenses.

em fingers crossed re: pay increase. That hotel breakfast sounds good.

Curls sorry to hear you've been feeling so ill. Get well soon!

Welcome Soot. Sorry to hear about the move - sounds like a stressful time for you.

Weight that's very disappointing about the life insurance. Always seems so unfair when people are penalized for something they have no control over. Good news about the title deeds.

Kookaburra I wish you every success with your home buying plan. I guess the only positive is that you don't have to pay rent at present. I'm so mad at your Ex (and all of the other deadbeat Dads you read about on MN) for not supporting his child financially. What do they expect their kids to live off? Fresh air?

Hello all. Been a bit quiet because Dmum fell off a chair (stood on it to hang a picture) and cut her leg very badly. Lots of fallout, 2 visits to hospital, all very difficult and emotional. Settled down now, although she is waiting the outcome of tests for something else, and very stressed about that.

I took her to her eye appointment yesterday and tried to combine it with a bit of clothes shopping in M&S, to lighten the mood. M&S is shit! Well, I think they still have some nice things, but the store layout is beyond awful. You feel like you are in a gigantic, ugly shed, and nothing looks appealing, or is easy to find. It's exhausting. We have decided that online shopping is the way forward, but at least she got a new lippy and nail varnish, and I have lent her a nice jumper and silk scarf so she has something 'new' for lunch on Sunday.

One good thing: I think she is now persuaded that they should make space for more good quality ready meals/ready to cook items in their food budget. The visit to the M&S foodhall WAS successful - 3 x pasta/risotto meals for £9 and a lovely bit of roast belly pork for £7.

I have managed to spend very little on food this week since last week's shops at Aldi and Sainsbury's. Will top up on fruit and veg this weekend, and we might treat ourselves to a takeaway pad thai or similar on Sunday. My other Mothering Sunday treat is going to see the new rom com Rye Lane, set in Peckham. We are going to see it at Peckhamplex, my favourite fleapit. All tickets cost £4.99, at all times, and this has been the case since about 2006. They just laugh in the face of inflationary cost pressures.

Ugh, kookaburra, so sorry about the useless ex. Is there an equivalent of the Chlld Maintenance Service that you could use to pursue a fairer payment?

Happy st Patrick’s day Irish frugaleers

Had to spend £30 on taxing the car, had a complete meltdown last night as I realised my new (second hand) car that I bought in January wasn't taxed 🤦‍♀️ in my defence the dealer told me it was taxed and when I rang dvla they said he must have buggered up the paperwork. I'm so pissed off as potentially could have been a disaster if I'd been pulled over or had an accident.

I hate confrontation so much couldn't quite bring myself to ring the dealer but I will as it's really poor that he didn't at least let me know.

No other spends.

Will need to get mothers day card and small gift tomorrow.

Not really the point of the thread but road tax is now non- transferable so whenever you get a new vehicle you have to sort out road tax as new keeper

Another car related error here today. Got a text from the insurance company saying it had expired. I’d totally forgotten to shop around or renew it! And I was already out and away from home. Luckily I had a spare 15 mins in between where I was and going to work to sit in said car and sort out a new policy. Oops!

Skies Oh no, how is your DM doing now? Sorry to hear of her accident, sounds pretty bad poor thing.

How stressful for both of you re: road tax and insurance! We finally sorted ours in the end, moved provider. Was more expensive than we paid last year but only slightly and the best deal available for us, sigh.

I've been down with a horrible cold virus since Wednesday eve. Probably caught it off DD as she was poorly end of last week/beginning of this week with same symptoms. NSD for me.

Still waiting for pay increase. Thought I’d find out yesterday but our HR person hasn’t written the letters yet 🙄

so hopefully Monday.

Badbudgeter yeah I realise that now but it wasn't explained to me at the time and the dealer hadn't transferred the details over to me. Oh well hopefully all sorted now.

After a fair amount of form filling in at work I finally got a specsavers voucher which will give me £49 off glasses! I'm very happy with that. I need to go on the rcn site today to claim my £50 towards the strike day.

Had my council tax letter Ystd £120 a month, so another £20 a month from last year. Am thinking I probably should change it to pay over 12 months although it is nice having two months CT free!

Have still got around £200 left this month with just over a week till payday which is so much better than the previous few months. I need to do a food shop and get fuel plus not had the plumber bill yet but should at least break even 😬

Weight - Dmum's leg doing well, and she is up to date with eye tests, thanks! She is currently being investigated by a couple of different specialties. As yet, there is nothing to indicate a cancer diagnosis, her symptoms could point to lots of things, even gut complications from Covid. But since she suffers from health anxiety (well, anxiety generally, really) she is convinced it is cancer, and that she is about to be snatched from the world. I don't mean to sound unkind, but she does rather eat her own joy, and she refuses to countenance that 'anxiety' might actually be a disorder that could be relieved with some medical and psychological help. And so she suffers. It's a hard old roundabout to be stuck on, really.

Painting lav, ironing, running errands and getting packed for Leeds trip today. Have 3 different places to eat lined up so far, and a list of places I want to visit. DS will be around for a lot of the time, but not all. It will be nice to be a single gal for a couple of days, no dog, no car even to bother about.

Afternoon. I've been reading but not had time to post.

@BigSkies2022 - one of the affects of DH's stroke is health anxiety. It can be draining at times, even if it's completely understandable. Let me know where you visit in Leeds, I'd be interested to see what a non resident does and thinks of the city.

@Taytocrisps I'm English and I hope the Irish team win the slam!

I'll keep up from now!

Please to say I'm in budget in all areas apart from two items this month. My little mental goal is to live within a set budget, which is way less than our combined wages, in case said wages stop.

This month I've paid our holiday deposit of £400, but that was saved money, the dogs will need the groomers this month, but I've set money aside for this too. Fuel, well, I reckon I'll have with £50 or a tenner left in that budget depending on whether I fill up this week. Food budget is my largest but actually, there's been a pile of other items I've just happened to buy at the supermarket that are nothing to do with food and I'm still within my set target.

Sky remote packed in but was faulty so they've sent another free and given me a £15 Tesco voucher.

Bought Regatta wellies on Vinted, brand new for £6. Tried to last with trainers but it's still too wet here.

My excess spends are
£110 on a Firestick and the cost of adding all the channels in the world to set stick, but I can stop some of our more costly subscriptions now (kept for DH).
£150 deposit for a training camp for running next year. I've got to have a goal to aim for that's for me, so I've bitten the bullet there. It's made me lace my trainers on and get an hours run in and put my heart rate monitor on too!
These spends will have to come out of savings but the budget I've set us is tight, so there is the money there from our wages, just trying to spend as little as I can.

So menu plan
Tonight - sweet spiced mushroom and pilau rice
Sunday - turkey and trimmings for Mother's Day from the freezer.
Monday - likely to be leftover turkey in a broth or curry.
Tuesday - Aloo Gobi shepherds pie.
Wednesday - either pie from previous night or spinach and chickpea curry.
Thursday - ratatouille
Friday - Halloumi tagine
Saturday - Tuna and apple pasta bake

Lunches - frittata and Thai spiced soup

Been into town, spends;
£3 Greggs on coffee and sandwich
£30 Wilkos on toiletries and other bits plus some summer bulbs to give mum for Mother's Day.
£68 Morrisons top up shop, also some extras for Mother's Day and for the garden.

In theory, other than milk and bread, shouldn't need to do another good shop before payday.

Going out for dinner tomorrow for Mother's Day with dmum and dd, I expect my mum will offer to pay, I've paid the £15 deposit.

Need how is dh doing? Did the stroke effect mobility and speech?

Fell off the thread, I think I’ve kept up with some of the chat but I might have missed things! How are you and DH doing, Need?

Food spends have been a bit up and down, I seem to have one good week then one that is not as tightly managed. Onwards and upwards…. Utilities are still too high too. I need the weather to improve! At least we don’t use the car much.

life has been really busy - visiting SN secondary schools for Ds (not found anywhere that seems remotely right yet, starting to panic!), work is super busy, lots of school governor stuff going on with HT recruitment, sorting out some tax and company stuff from when I was self-employed AND trying to make progress with the building plans for our house. 2 more weeks till the tender deadline and then I’ll know what work we might be able to do, eek.

Off up to Yorkshire next week - I’m taking a day off work to visit the DIY Kitchens show room somewhere near Doncaster. I’m taking the train and very excited about lovely train time alone (though I will surely nap!) and browsing kitchens (very exciting!)

but first, we’re catching up with Happy Valley (end of series 2) and it’s so good!

Happy mothers’ day to all the frugaleer mums, and sympathy for those missing mums x

Blimey Half secondary school, how did that happen?? I really hope you find somewhere you're happy with & soon
Em fingers crossed for your pay
kookaburra sounds like you've done brilliantly in very challenging circumstances
Belated Happy St Patrick's day Happier and Tayto hope you had fun
Love your meal plans need
Big hope your mum recovers quickly
Weight do you & dh work in NHS? If so then there is a chunk of life cover within your pensions which might help?

Was having a pretty frugal month, but away this weekend which has been more spendy. Drove to Somerset Friday & spent the day with ds which was lovely. He is the happiest & healthiest I have seen him in 6 years. Then drove on to Devon. Took mil out yesterday while dh, ds & pil were at football (still going well half). Paid for lunch £30.
Today we are going for a waterfront walk which will be lovely, early to get our charity steps in (me on crutches!). I've now raised over £700 which feels good & makes the effort worth it. Then on to sil for roast dinner, then the long drive home.
Have a lovely mother's day all

Happy mothering Sunday (I won’t be going to my home church, or indeed any)
we have usual mil over for dinner

gosh half, you will find something

Happy Mother’s Day, everyone.

Not doing anything special here. I did the rounds to my mum, mil and DHs gran yesterday with flowers and cards. Today I’m not doing much , just a batch of ironing and roast chicken dinner.

Then I’m packing ready for an early start tomorrow as it’s my long awaited spa day! And the fact that it’s all been saved hard, bought and paid for feels brilliant. I nipped to the shops yesterday for a bottle of red and some chocolate for my night in the hotel.

Hope everyone has a lovely Sunday whatever you’re up to.

Happy Mothering Sunday Frugal Folk, and love to those for which the day may tougher.

Thanks for asking about DH, @HalfWomanHalfChocolate and @Girliefriendlikespuppies. It's hard work in truth. I'm glad the DC are here to share the load. He's affected physically and mentally so there's a lot of rehab and care involved.

Lovely news re your DS @northender! What a nice post. Great fundraising efforts there too.

Life sounds pretty full on @HalfWomanHalfChocolate. Hoping you find suitable provision for for DS. Enjoy God's Own County!

Enjoy the meal @Girliefriendlikespuppies

Spends have been £10 on Amazon for oat milk, which is the cheapest I've found. £7 on deserts for Mother's Day meal.

Got some new recipe books for Mother's Day from the dc and managed a quick walk with a friend this morning in the glorious sunshine. Hoping to run later too if there's time.

And enjoy the spa day @CurlsandCurves!

Happy Mother's Day everyone.

I got up early to cook a chilli for dinner for DD later and also so we can have leftovers for dinner tomorrow after work. Dad and I are going for a carvery lunch (he doesn't really like posh food) so it won't be too expensive. I've got into the habit of going for lunch with him every fortnight. He's been a bit depressed this winter and I think it does him good to get out of the house. I'd have him over for lunch but he doesn't live nearby and doesn't drive. And I'd rather not cook in his house 'cos his cooking pots and implements aren't the cleanest. Heading off shortly.

I need to book DCats in for their vaccinations. Hoping I can get a Saturday morning appointment but I'll take a half-day if necessary. Not looking forward to it. DCat2 is a very anxious cat and generally poos and pukes on the way to the vet. DCat1 is fine. DD will probably be working so she won't be here to help me get them into their cat carriers.