Social Services

[StayAGhost]

With the cost of living crisis, will social services have different expectations regarding cleanliness and food?
Growing up in the 70/80's we had ONE wash day per week. That was it. This was normal and acceptable at the time
Now my children are in school, they seem to expect perfectly and laundered clothes. I don't see how this is sustainable when tumble drier is too costly, heating isn't on and its pissing it down with rain.
The school has phoned a couple of times to say "your son's trousers are aren't clean (he often goes stream jumping before school, they were clean when he left the house)
Same with food. The expectation was one hot meal a day is fine
Now the school have phoned to make me aware he's had sandwiches rather than dinner (stood in the wrong line apparently)
So would SS bear these things in mind???

It’s more and more difficult for families and I’m sure social services will take that into account.

Many children have just one hot meal a day and as long as the other meals are nutritious, that shouldn’t impact.

I agree that washing and drying school clothes overnight will be tougher. It’s still good for kids to have clean uniform each morning. That means having several school trousers/tops/skirts or whatever is needed. New uniforms can be given through your local uniform bank - usually 2 or 3 of each item so please ask your social worker to refer you.

Getting your son to stop puddle jumping may be harder!

Back in the day, a conservative-voting aunt of mine used to say that there was no poverty anymore because children all had shoes and I would just imagine the consequences if I were ever to send my child into school without shoes.

I grew up in the 70's and 80's an we certainly had a wash every day, not one day a week, I wouldn't say it was acceptable to wash once a week in the 70s.

School uniform can be dealt with by washing and hanging straight up it doesn't need to go in the tumble dryer or to be ironed.

Why do you let your son jump in streams in his school trousers before school? Especially when the school are ringing you to say his trousers aren't clean? Are they really saying they aren't clean or are they saying they are wet?

I think most people have one hot main meal a day and always have done - again not a 70's thing.

Well I find it very odd that the school are ringing to say he's not had a hot meal!
There's no rule saying anyone has to have a hot meal every day!

They will bear it in mind we the cost of living is affecting everyone. My kids get clean uniform everyday but the rules are you don't roll down hills, jump in puddles etc on the way to school and you arrive clean. I have actually explained to my kids it's important the school see that they are clean in the mornings. They do come home filthy but that's a mess from playing in the playground. You need to tell your son to stop jumping in streams etc on the way to school. If he doesn't install a consequence like no TV after school etc. He will soon stop. Apart from the cleanliness side your son being in wet clothes all day in colder weather could make him sick.

I am no sure how it's your issue he got sandwiches rather than a hot meal in school though.

If your struggling to get clothes washed and dried get them straight of after school and do the wash then. You can hang them up overnight on shower rails or even under an old paddling pool thrown over the washing line if it's light rain. I watch the weather forecast now and do most of my washing based on the forecast. If it's dry the beds and towels get done. If it's pouring they wait till the next dry day.

Please don't take this the wrong but are you struggling financially? If so please have a look at entitled to online to check you are getting all the help you are entitled to and speak to the school to see if they can help. I just wondered as you mentioned no heating and a hot meal

Now the school have phoned to make me aware he's had sandwiches rather than dinner (stood in the wrong line apparently)

Surely that is for your information, not them complaining?

I don't have a social worker

I was just musing

I do get surprised by the school on occasion, and im not sure how many phone calls your allowed before SS intervention
I did wonder if SS will bear in mind how expensive everything is.

I guess it's around expectations of normal, which as an older mum is very different from my school experience
Things like clothes washed daily, blazers weekly, new shoes as soon as they've shown wear

Another example is school uniform
I had to buy DD THREE lots of boots last year.
Bought

1. not suitable brown sole
2. not suitable due to buckle (very small black buckle on black boots)
3. not suitable due to "excess trim" Again small detailing in black on black boots Cost well over £100 in total

I'm not sure how quickly this would have been escalated to SS, as "failure to provide proper uniform ", that school classes this as

This. Very weird.

SS won’t care about how often clothes are washed or hot meals every day AS LONG as children are thriving. Skinny, smelly children would raise red flags.

The shoes thing sounds like wrong shoes doesn't it? Rather than not providing any shoes for her?

Denholme elloitt
I'm talking about a full clothes wash daily
Obviously they have a shower daily
An I'm talking about clothes that aren't particularly mucky

Food doesn’t have to be hot or cooked to be nutritious. My assembled, cold midday meal is often my most balanced and nutritious meal of the day.

Not really. I would except a school age child old enough to be going into school without supervision to know not to walk or jump in streams before school in school clothes. Surely they know that’s an after school or weekend thing in wellington boots an fold clothes.

I think everyone can wash daily. Maybe not a deep luxury hot bath, but hot water in sink or bowl with facecloth to wash main hands, face and dirty parts has been normal for centuries.

Uk School trousers are usually thin. You can easily spot wipe regular spills from them with a cloth to get an extra day wear if say ketchup spill

Purple me
I spend all weekend trying to find boots
She walks to school (another thing that seems to set me apart, every one just drives).
I gave up in the end, bright some light weight shoes and wellies. She then had to carry wellies round all day, due to lack of lockers!

Ah ok. Well, no i don't think its necessary to have clean clothes every day. Underwear/socks/blouse, yes, clean every day - skirt/trousers and jumpers - probably 2 a week unless dirt is visible.

Do the school have concerns that youre not feeding your child any hot food OP? Is that why they ring you to tell you he hasn't had hot food at school? To ensure that you give him hot food when he gets home.Its not normal for schools to ring and this unless theres an issue. To be honest most people with school children still cook a hot meal in the evening as the school dinners aren't all that good these days and the adults want a hot meal too so cook for everyone.

Yea
Of course we have a hot meal at dinner.
Obviously does not turn up wet and muddy
I'm just talking about NOT IMMACULATELY dressed in fully laundered and pressed clothes
Just kids been kids
Standing in the wrong line
Getting messy before school
And jumping through hoops for uniform policy

Unless a child's diet is significant impacting on their health then social care would not be involved. They certainly wouldn't be involved because a child hasn't had a hot meal a day or because school have reported their clothes are abit dirty. There also isn't a number of times a referral is made before social cafe would complete an assessment. If schools or any other professional are going to refer then the family should know about this in advance

Just have spare uniforms that’s all
you can do no way would my kids uniform be dried if I washed it and hanged it up it wouldn’t be dry the next day without using heating

Why are people washing the whole school uniform every day?
DS had a clean shirt every day but trousers and jumper lasted 2 or 3 days (with lunch stains sponged off if necessary) and I never worried that Social Services would be informed.

Sorry meant to add re the food - aslong as a child is being fed there isn't an expectation from social care in terms of what their daily diet should look like! Lots of children only have a hot meal in school and schools I have worked with know this - it actually takes the burden off families who are struggling knowing their child has had a hot meal at lunch

This is all very odd on behalf of the school. Certainly none of my DC’s school would expect completely clean clothes every day (in that they’d be fine with a splodge of paint in the elbow rather than filthy) or ring me if they’d had a sandwich instead of a hot lunch. It’s not a legal requirement to have a hot meal every single day.

I’ve never found the school shoe policy difficult to comply with either. Seems like you have an exceptionally nitpicky school.

Again we have a hot meal every nite

The school clothes are clean. Not necessarily immaculate
I have no idea what was wrong with the boots!!
No issues since using shoes, but not great for waking in and need replacements much quicker than the boots would
It's interesting to note that other posters assume I'm not looking after the children, and that's the concern around SS

My kids clothes are washed every day as they always come out of school messy!

Nobody's going to phone SS about boots having a buckle on or a child getting in the sandwiches line. Are there any reasons you're so concerned about SS involvement?

Re spare uniform
That's what I've done in the end
5 trousers
5 shirts
1 blazer per child replaced AS SOON AS it looks even slightly tight (rather than waiting till end of term/ pay day)
5 skirts
5 blouses
5 tights

3 boots now outgrown!

Bathe
The school were saying "failure to provide uniform "
They happy enough I with the light weight shoes