Budget wedding- evening buffet only

[Crazyeyes86]

Help! Me and dp have been engaged for 2 years. We have a 2 Year old dd and his ds from previous. We are desperate to get married, buy a house and have another baby but unfortunately cannot do any oh these as we are drowning in debt . It is soul destroying. Have decided to set a date for wedding for summer 2015 and just do it on the tightest budget we can. Every time I start to plan the whole thing seems a stress.
Ideally we would bugger off abroad and throw a party when we get back but money would be an issue. So am thinking of a late ceremony and straight into a buffet followed by disco. Would you be if you came to a wedding like this? Anyone had this type of wedding and would you mind sharing how much you spent? It is the only way we can afford to invite everyone along and avoid the politics and arguments whilst keeping the budget down. Worry it won't feel like a real wedding though iyswim

I've been to loads like that and they're just as good :)

One thing I would consider is to try and make the day a little more compact so you pay less for things like the photographer (say if you get married at around 3pm, you're only paying for a photographer for a few hours!) you don't have people expecting as much food and drink either.

We did a sit down meal, but we told the waiters to only give guests a certain numbers of bottles of wine per table, after that they had to pay for themselves.

At our evening reception, we had a disco with a finger buffet and some seating for the older/,more reserved relatives. You could get married say around 3pm, have a celebration drinks and then head to a finger buffet with formal speaeches, cutting of the cake and disco. If you have tables in the hall too everyone can fele included, you can decoarte the tables with confetti and small flower arrangements so it will still feel really nice. (Most places let you provide these too keeping costs down).

Plus, when it comes to weddings there are loads you can do yourself. Do you know anybody who can help make a cake/ do the photos etc. Can you buy a once worn dress, or pay for your dress in installments? Limit the number of ushers and bridesmaid. (We were cheeky and asked ours to hire their own garb, and they were all realllly cool about that!). You could make your own invites too, or go somewhere nice like M&S or Paperchase and buy their ones, this will be much cheaper than paying a invitation company!

Enjoy it :)

That's what we are doing.

ceremony at 4pm.
be at the reception venue 5ish.
speechs and toast, then cake cutting.
then a buffet, with wedding cake and lots of other homemade cakes for dessert.

our budget is about £3k in total, hopefully less than that!

My cousin just got married on a shoestring budget. They had a very small ceremony, just immediate family and closest friends. They did this on a Monday - cheaper.

Then they had a party on the Saturday, hired a village hall. My other cousin did the bunting, they bought a few helium balloons, table decorations etc. Nothing cost very much and it all looked lovely. There was a pay bar, with first drink free which was nice. They did buy a barrel of ale, which was a bit cheaper for those who liked it. A friend did the disco.

The food was a joint effort with the mothers doing most of it, but good friends chipped in with various stuff. They went to Costco to get a lot of it. The food was probably the nicest (and hugest) buffet I have ever seen! Absolutely stacks of food, from the standard sandwich and pork pies, to veggie bites, samosas, prawns and salmon. The only downside was that there was so much left over (only because there was so much in the first place) my auntie was almost sobbing at the waste.

If you really put your mind to it you can have a fab wedding for very little. I remember a friend of mine who got married on a budget of 500. That was about 10 years ago mind, but it's still bugger all. She said that because family and friends all chipped in to help it made it even more special.

We did this and it was fab (I think, didn't hear any complaints). Married at 5pm, close friends and family only (28 in all) Register signing and photos etc took us to 6pm and we had canapés / coffee / champagne and some speeches and mingling. We stuck some cash behind the bar too to get everyone a couple of drinks of their choice.
This took us to 7:30 when the evening guests started to arrive (another 80 or so) and the DJ of course. It was all done in the same venue so no travelling about.

The only thing I did a little differently was to open the evening buffet a little earlier and include some hot hearty dishes (curry / chilli/ rice / roasties) as I was quite mindful that some people had been there since 4:30 and would appreciate a decent feed .

Go for it, sounds fine! Or, you could get married one weekend and have a meal with your close family and v v close friends, asking everyone to pay for their own meal/drinks as they would if they went out for dinner normally. Then the following weekend, have a big party at a hall for everyone you know, sell cans/bottles of wine at cost price etc so it doesn't cost you anything. That way you still get both aspects of the wedding (sit down meal, and the party) without having to pay for everyone at all stages. Oh, and ask people to donate favours rather than any presents... So a couple of people could maybe arrange flowers, or a cake, people could decorate the hall, any keen photographers could do photos for you, get some people to bring some food for the party and so on... It's how my parents did it in the 70s and it worked perfectly!

I actually think that better anyway, there's way too much hanging around if the ceremony is earlier in the day.

Friends of ours got married abroad so avoided all the usual ceremony costs - no car hire, bridesmaid dresses, suit hire for ushers etc. They had a reception at a weekend when they got back - it was in a local sports club in a nice park near their house, the kind of place where drinks cost pennies and isn't that expensive to hire even on a weekend. They did a cold buffet - nothing fancy, but plenty of it (which is more important ). They did all invitations etc by email so no costs there either.

I think they had fizz for toasting but other drinks were up to the guests. It was really good fun and much more relaxed than some weddings - some people (including the bride) were fully kitted out, while others (inc the groom) were in jeans. They had the usual speeches (which were brilliant) and music from an iPod, so no DJ costs and all music to their taste, and I think their cake was homemade or provided by a friend. So ticked a lot of the traditional wedding boxes at very low cost. I don't remember much in the way of special decor, so none of the usual flowers/seat cover etc costs (the bride did have a bouquet to toss, but again, not the usual expensive-looking bouquet, could have been a bunch from the supermarket for all I knew and no one cared, it was just for the toss!), and some of our friends are keen photographers so brought their fancy cameras and the photos we saw looked great (although progressively less in focus!) so no photographer costs. I'm sure they didn't spend much but it felt like they put a lot of effort in, and it was such a fun and relaxed night and didn't feel 'less of a wedding' than a big fancy celebration in a posh hotel in the middle of the countryside.

From a guest point of view, it was miles easier to get to/from than a lot of traditional wedding venues - plenty of public transport and close to city centre too, and we probably spent much less on taxis and buying our own drinks than we would have on a normal night out, considering how much some bars charge. Although I couldn't tell you what we spent, as we were having too much fun to notice or care, it definitely wasn't much, and at some weddings we've spent £50+ for a few basic drinks at the hotel bar, so better all round!

HTH and good luck with your wedding

I think if you have serious debt then it may be wise to focus on paying that off next year and delay the wedding for a year, it is not worth getting into even more debt for. Of course if you can afford £500 or £1000 or £3000 then go for it, but from your op it sounded like serious money stress. Add to that wedding stress and the cost of the wedding making the debts worth and you may have a much happier start to married life waiting a little longer. Yes bunting and village halls are cheap, but it all adds up and if you simply haven't got the money then think about it a it more. Good luck to you whenever you get married

If you are drowning in debt, why not just elope here? License fee, buy rings at a pawn shop (they are not a legal requirement) and job done.

I got married abroad, with just oh & ds. We had a party at home 2 weeks later. We had about 30 guests, a 18ft party tent in the garden & conservatory open. I made curry & a buffet. It was really good. Threw the last out at half 3am.
Think of how many people you REALLY want to have a party with. It cost about £500 with drinks.

We got married at 11:30am and then went to a restaurant for a sit down meal for about 46. We had to leave by 4pm so the restaurant could set up ready for the evening's service. Guests who'd had to travel went home, those living locally or staying with relatives just did their own thing for the evening. We had a pub crawl followed by an informal party in our flat for anyone who was at a loose end. The whole thing came to around £2,000 including outfits and rings. It is possible. ;)

if you are drowning in debt you can't afford a big party. If you need to get married it costs under £100 at the registry office, save the party until later. A wedding that is legal is a real wedding.

the wedding plan sounds fine but you cannot afford it.

priorities.

My dsis had a really budget wedding.
Register office in the afternoon. Buffet for close friends and family, that me, my dmum and other dsis did, at my mums house (just a average 4 bed house). It was a lovely day and we spent a lot of time in the garden.
Then all mates/work colleages were invited to the local pub small party room. They just put out nibbles.

My dsis is really pretty and just bought a simple dress, but looked stunning. My mums friend is a florist and did the flowers as a present and her grooms auntie had a posh car that they hired out for weddings, which they drove for free. Dbil took photos.
Granted she got a lot of help with the extras, but things like the car, they wouldn't have bothered with. Was a really good day and very cheap.

There was a really good Superscrimpers episode where they did a wedding on the cheap, if you want to have a look.

Another call to focus on getting rid of debt before planning wedding. Like others have suggested you can get married with out having a wedding. By this a mean just both of you, very close family and then dinner. Or even you two and two witnesses.

Weddings like this are often much much better! They seem to be more about love and celebration, than stiff boring 'traditional' weddings.

We got married at 2pm, had afternoon tea at 3pm and everyone went by 6pm.

Don't know why you think you have to provide a big meal

We are doing the same as Trinity. Looking forward to spending the evening with just my new DH

Your wedding sounds great OP. I'd come!
If people know you're skint they don't mind chipping in or roughing it! It's great big extravagant weddings where the couple still ask for lots of cash that annoy people.
A wedding isn't about how much you spend it's about you & OH making a lifetime commitment and friends & family sharing your special day.
Long weddings can be boring and expensive for the guests too.
Agree with a PP that everything else is optional apart from the legal bit. Could u just do the legal bit and have a celebration once you've paid off your debts? A double celebration perhaps?

It can absolutely be done!
I got married last yr on a shoe string budget and I wouldn't have changed a thing!
We got married at 3 and by the time photos etc were done everyone got to the reception venue at around 4-4.30 then we had afternoon tea (finger sandwiches, scones with jam & cream etc..) and did speeches then had a disco and evening buffet.
Our venue only charged for a bottle of wine once it was open and our grandparents conspired and pinched all the un-opened bottles once the disco started so we ended up getting about £250 back from that and nobody even noticed!
I decorated the venue with help from my parents and friends, I made my own bunting from pretty vintage sheets I found in a charity shop (obvs I have them a good wash first! Not that they needed it they were pristine)
And brought pretty enamel jugs from the range for £3 each which I filled with flowers my dad and I brought the night before reduced to about 20p a bunch in tescos!
There are tons of ways you can cut back trust me! Oh and check out sienna-Mai invitations on eBay they do pretty invites etc.. Pretty cheap!
Hope I've helped x

Get married at 5pm, ask people to join you at the pub afterwards?

We did a cheap wedding (I wore a dress I already had) but it still cost nearly 2k - most of that food and drink for 80ppl, even though we catered it all ourselves.

We were married at the beginning of this month and had exactly that type of wedding. Reg office at 3pm, then straight to social club. We had a hot & cold buffet, DJ and karayoke and the caterer dressed the venue... well the caterer arranged everything and I paid her a lump sum which we paid monthly up to the wedding. For the hot/cold buffet for 80, room dressing, DJ and karayoke it was £1400, total wedding cost inc ceremony, clothes, rings, favours etc was about £2.5k. MIL bought disposable cameras for the tables and everyone uploaded their pics to FB so we didn't need a photographer. A relative made our cake and a friend made the bouquets from artificial flowers that I bought. I got my dress from Coast in their sale and my friend adjusted the straps for me. Bridesmaid dresses and page boy suits were bought at the local market.

We had a brilliant time and everyone was very happy with the food and entertainment. The DJ did a lot of games with the kids and dragged parents in too, was massive fun and the only regret I have is that everyone had to go home and the evening had to end. Loved every minute of it :)

I honestly prefer these types of weddings!
I'll something similar for mine I think (if I ever get around to organising it).

Sounds like a lovely plan you have! I love a wedding that starts late, get straight into the party feeling without all the waiting around of other weddings!

As long as people are fed and watered they will all be very supportive of your special day :)