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Original poster

We are so skint

16 replies

tilliebob · 17/01/2014 19:21

Can anyone link me to any useful threads as I am pretty new here and the site kinda overwhelms me.

We are so skint. We really need to cut back. I've cut the Sky, changed from my life long dentist (who has now gone private) to an NHS dentist and we are going to see about paying interest only on our mortgage for a while if we can ( does that happen?).

I have been looking at the MSE site but it overwhelms me too!

Feeling really sad and pathetic this evening. Sad

OP posts:
MyGoldenNotebook · 17/01/2014 19:36

Lots of us are there Tillie - this is a good place for support :-) Have you tried changing where you do your weekly shop? Aldi works very well for lots of people here.

Have you worked out your finances using spread sheets and really worked out where your money is going?

You're not pathetic - you want to change, and to be honest, unless you earn A LOT of money it's hard not to struggle these days - especially if you have children.

Mum2Fergus · 17/01/2014 19:49

Lots of us in same position OP...well done for recognising and acknowledging your position-that's already a huge step. Have you written out a proper breakdown of all your money coming in and going out? That's always best place to start ...

Original poster
tilliebob · 17/01/2014 20:27

Just going through the bank statements online just now. Doesn.t help that DH is a total shambles with money. Just been cutting up store cards so I am not tempted to spend on them/ spend more on them. We have 3 dcs and they seem to be growing like weeds just now. I see 3 pairs of school shoes being needed shortly...

OP posts:
specialsubject · 17/01/2014 21:01

ooh, lots of people here love to help with budget, me included! Bring on the breakdown of costs...

stop buying clothes for adults, UNLESS something is actually worn out and you have none of them left. You have enough clothes for years, everyone does.

no magazines, no newspapers, no books (library), no takeaways, no coffees/teas etc.

no makeup, basic toiletries only, cleaning materials when you really run low.

comparison for insurances and fuel bills.

all a good start.

lougle · 17/01/2014 21:12

Hi tilliebob Smile

Do you think you literally don't have enough coming in, or is it more that you need to spend what you have more carefully?

I'd heartily recommend YNAB - an envelope budgeting software, we have a thread going here

Original poster
tilliebob · 18/01/2014 18:34

Combination of things really, DH was headhunter for a job last summer which we thought was the answer to all our problems. How dare I think positively for once Confused. The bloody arsehole bosses pulled a flanker a few months later and closed the place. They then reopened it once the workers had been forced into a pay cut, bonus cut, overtime ban etc etc . Beyond raging - he'd never have changed jobs if he'd known all this (bosses' propaganda was the place had been losing gazillions for years, so they knew what was ahead when they employed him). On the strength of his shiny new job, I finally got out of my very stressful workplace and took a new post only working 3 days a week in an area I really wanted on work in. This reducing my hours had also been recommended by my doc for a while due to various health issues I have.

Soooo...we have been crap with our money, having our youngest 5 years ago led to us extending our house which used the equity on our house to build. We are paying back the new amount over the original term which is a lot per month, but only for another 10 yrs. We could manage if it wasn't for trying to pay off ,store cards and cc's per month too. We are going to try and take a mortgage break for a couple of months and use that money to pay things off, then resume paying it. Am hoping they go for it. We can't be the only folks like this? I am currently working an extra day a week o/t but due to child care and my health issues it's only a temporary arrangement (it was only offered on temp basis anyway). After only 2 weeks, I am flagging already. This makes me feel even more worthless to be honest as if I could work f/t I'd probably earn more than DH will be getting now.

Sorry, that's a right ramble but I'm just getting things down in words and getting them out my head Sad.

OP posts:
Original poster
tilliebob · 18/01/2014 18:35

*headhunteD

OP posts:
lougle · 18/01/2014 18:42

That's tough Sad I would really recommend you try YNAB - it really works and most people feel like their money has been stretched by using it! I think it's the mindfulness it brings to your spending decisions - you suddenly realise where your money goes.

YNAB do a 34 day free trial, so there's no risk in trying it, and if you don't get on with it you've lost nothing Smile

They have great tutorials on dealing with CC debt, etc., too.

Original poster
tilliebob · 18/01/2014 18:44

Cheers lougie - I will look at that when I get me laddo in his bed.

OP posts:
nkf · 18/01/2014 18:50

You cannot do a thing until you know exactly what you have coming in and what is going out. My advice would be to buy a small notebook and start writing down everything you buy. Even a bottle of water. Then use excel to add up income and regular outgoings. I think someone on mn has created spreadsheets for this. I don't know where they are but someone will. This is fixable. Truly it is.

lougle · 18/01/2014 18:54

nkf I agree, which is why YNAB is so good. It really does make your spending so obvious and transparent. You can record transactions on the go with a smartphone app (free as long as you have the software), budget as many categories as you like, etc.

I used to say to DH 'if only we had 10 bank accounts so we could save for different things.' With YNAB, we can have as many envelopes as we want, so it doesn't matter that the money is all from one account.

Fairylea · 18/01/2014 18:57

Definitely start with a complete budget of everything going in and out.

Don't buy new school shoes until you have tried ebay first - new if you have to but sometimes you do get secondhand bargains that still have lots of wear in them.

Make sure you are not paying any interest on your credit cards and store cards. Transfer them ALL to one card with 0% interest. See money saving expert for the best deals at the moment. Once you have transfered the balances cut all the cards up including the new one. Just pay it off.

I wouldn't necessarily go interest only or mortgage holiday on your mortgage. It will cost you more in the longer term. Look to try and cut back on everything and even write to card companies to ask for reduced payments before reducing mortgage payments.

If you do a full expenditure we can help you more :)

Nojustalurker · 22/01/2014 21:19

Get rid of sky tv. There are plenty of channels on freeview.

andrewthedaddy · 23/01/2014 12:36

Hi, I can totally relate. I've got two little ones; one in nursery and one who can't go to a mainstream nursery until he's two at the very least. He was born at 23 weeks so it was a strain financially for my wife and I. I recently started a business to help families with kids who are struggling. If anyone wants to know more, feel free to contact me.

Mooycow · 24/01/2014 15:59

Plan your weekly shopping / budget and stick to it
No extras, try Aldi for a few weeks , it takes time to get your head around the veg being next to a road type drill but it works for us, normal shop in asda £140 per week (4 adults)
aldi £70 -£80 with extras and meals planned .
stop take away anything including drinks, try the local market for veg etc if you shop late in the day some good bargains to be had .

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