Moderna triggering depression?

[sunkendreams]

First two doses were AZ and side effects were relatively mild - achy, tired, spent afternoon in bed with first one but just got on with and had an early night with the second. But I had my Moderna booster on Wednesday which knocked me sideways and for 36 hours I felt shocking: aches, headache, nausea etc. Nothing unexpected though and all appear on the NHS website as common side effects.

However, on top of this I have had extremely vivid, unpleasant dreams and two nights in a row I have woken up in the throes of a panic attack, heart racing, feeling like I'm going to die etc. I have been tearful on and off since Thursday morning and feel incredibly low. This afternoon I have felt suicidal with a constant negative voice in my head telling me how shit I am as a mum, wife, human being etc. I honestly feel quite unhinged and cannot think straight. Am only able to type this as I've had a good cry and feel temporarily calmer.

What is really upsetting me is that I have suffered from quite severe depression and anxiety in the past, but I saw a brilliant counsellor a few years ago and have been stable since. Life is good, no other medications interfering etc. There has genuinely been no other trigger and at the beginning of this week I was really happy and full of enthusiasm for the new year. I feel like I've relapsed without any warning or reason. The only thing I can think might be a factor is that I started my period the day after the booster, although that doesn't normally affect my mood beyond the normal low level irritability that most women get.

Is this something anyone else has experienced? Should I contact my GP on Monday?

You can contact your gp but prepare for them to be quite dismissive of any link to the vaccine, and brace for many of the responses here to do likewise.
Your symptoms actually sound really similar to people who have adverse reactions to the anti-malarial mefloquine.

Be prepared for people here with no medical experience blaming the vaccine. Or go and see your gp if you’re concerned.

As pure anecdote, I’ve had moderna x3 and no depression as side effect. But my experience isn’t yours so go and see a healthcare professional if you are concerned

@MaxNormal

You can contact your gp but prepare for them to be quite dismissive of any link to the vaccine, and brace for many of the responses here to do likewise. Your symptoms actually sound really similar to people who have adverse reactions to the anti-malarial mefloquine.

Mefloquine is a drug, not a vaccine, that has a clear mechanism for neurotoxcity.

I don't understand this reply - OP has become unwell, and the focus needs to be on getting treatment for that, not on trying to pin it to a vaccine which is unlikely to have directly caused it.

@sunkendreams please chat to someone in real life if you can and contact your GP asap to explain your having suicidal thoughts.

Fever can cause symptoms like this, so it's possible you're having this kind of reaction which was exacerbated by the nightmares? I really hope you feel better soon and if the suicidal thoughts get worse please contact emergency services

Be prepared for people with no medical experience to tell you that this has got absolutely nothing to do with the vaccine.
A very close relative of mine suffered terribly within days of having vaccine number 2.
Thankfully, the University hospital she attended took her life changing 'event' very seriously and many many questions were asked.
They definitely didn't shy away from discussing vaccine side effects.

Go and see your GP.

@ollyollyoxenfree I was replying to counteract the inevitable it's just stress/anxiety responses. Damage from any sort of medication is absolutely shit for the gaslighting that ensues.
Yes it's a different drug, I was just pointing out that the symptoms were similar.

Thank you for the responses so far and apologies if I'm not properly acknowledging them - just for the avoidance of doubt, this isn't an anti vax thread, and I was perfectly happy to receive my initial doses and the booster. I am however quite certain the booster has caused my current state of distress. My earlier depression / anxiety was routed in a traumatic event that was properly treated and resolved, at least to my satisfaction, initially through medication but more effectively through psychotherapy (apologies I think I said counselling above which I know is not the same thing!). I use the term "unhinged" because I've never felt this way without a cause or a trigger and I haven't felt this way for a significant amount of time - I feel like I've been shunted backwards for no apparent reason and it's incredibly distressing.

I have had moments of feeling okay, weirdly. Last night, for instance, I watched a couple of films with DH and DS (and even responded to a couple of random threads on here) and even though I felt flat I did feel I was on the mend, only to wake up in the middle of a panic attack in the early hours.

@MaxNormal

You can contact your gp but prepare for them to be quite dismissive of any link to the vaccine, and brace for many of the responses here to do likewise. Your symptoms actually sound really similar to people who have adverse reactions to the anti-malarial mefloquine.

I had the Moderna booster, not mefloquine though? Haven't been taking any other medication besides paracetamol and haven't had any other injections since my second dose in June last year.

I don't have experience in Agronomy but I'm pretty damn sure hay fever can be triggered by pollen and I don't need to be a chemist to know that it's not a good idea to drink battery acid.

Be prepared for gaslighting from those that will not hear that anything bad could possibly ever come from these jabs. No one can say for sure how individuals will react to them, especially multiple doses in a short space of time. A homeopath may be able to help with symptoms if you get dismissed by the GP.

Correlation is not causation. Ice cream does not cause drownings even though eating ice cream and drowning peak in the same months.

What is really really important though is that you get help. Please talk to a medical professional, soon.

If you are having a mental health crisis with suicidal ideation you should definitely contact your GP urgently, and/or call a local mental health crisis line (England | Wales | Scotland | Northern Ireland). And worth filling in a yellow card report for the vaccine -- it will be ages before there's enough data to know whether the two things are likely to be related but getting your data into the system is helpful.

I had my 4th Pfizer last week and have felt absolutely awful for 8 days afterwards. Very very tearful, very negative thoughts. It lifted yesterday, like someone just flipped a switch and turned it off. I reported it to the mhra.

If it helps I'm a vaccinator. There is no evidence of a link between the vaccine and depression. There is also no suggestion of it in any of the papers I have seen. As a previous poster said, fever can cause these symptoms and if you are concerned please see your GP. I see no possible way that the vaccine could trigger your depression though, in terms of biology and how vaccines work.

Many of my friends and colleagues have reported similar extremely vivid and disturbing dreams after Moderna

Forgot to say, you can also report this if you are worried via the yellow card scheme.

I had the Moderna booster on 9 December (after first two AZ doses, which didn't affect me at all). Since then I've been exhausted, and my anxiety (treated by sertraline) has been all over the place, my sleep pattern has been very erratic, and my stress levels are high. I was fine before the booster. I've reported it to the yellow card scheme, not sure what else I can do but wait and hope it gets better. I can't see my GP being interested.

Vivid and disturbing dreams after testing positive for Covid too.