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Original poster

Some perspective

31 replies

Christmas20021 · 29/12/2021 10:33

We went for lunch on Monday with friends of ours (she's an old uni friend and one of my best friends)

They picked us up in a taxi and we travelled half an hour to the restaurant, she was coughing and clearly had a 'bug' she assured us it wasn't Covid (so I assumed she had tested) and we had lunch. I felt really on edge every time she coughed, and commented was she sure she didn't have Covid! She then told us she hadn't tested 😡

Her DH even seemed a bit embarrassed by this. We made an excuse not to get a taxi back with them and said we wanted to have a wander around the sales, my DH was furious.

This morning, she has WhatsApped me to say she has just done an LFT, it's positive and she feels really ill (no 'shit, I hope I didn't pass it in to you')

I'm not going to kick a dog when they're down and I'm sure apologising to me, or even acknowledging how irresponsible she was isn't top of agenda if she feels poorly ... but I'm really pissed off. I'm also having to manage DH's utter fury at the situation.

We've had to cancel lunch today with extended family, as FIL is CEV

No really point to this post, other than to vent. I can't vent at DH as it will - rightly, on this occasion - fuel his dislike of my friend.

Arrrgh! 🤬

OP posts:
x2boys · 29/12/2021 10:38

Well your friend is irresponsible,but tbh you could also have picked up COVID in the restaurant or the taxi
So either you stay home untill we are over this wave or accept you can get it from anywhere .

Babyontheway21 · 29/12/2021 10:41

Oh dear such a selfish thing today, doesn’t take 5 minutes to do a lft before meeting with friends especially if you are feeling ill. I tested +ve on Christmas morning not something I would have planned to happen as it ruined a lot of peoples days not just mine. You are right to cancel your plans as you just never know and to be honest this variant is spreading so quickly it wouldn’t surprise me if sitting in the taxi alone has helped you contract it. Your friend was very wrong to do this. I hope you can enjoy your day and soon you can have family together again.Flowers

Proudcarer6829 · 29/12/2021 10:43

Some really selfish people around. Why would it not occur to her that a cough is the main symptom and that she should get a pcr. Also why not even tell you so you can decide. I just can't comprehend people like that and I would be really mad too! 😒

candlelightsatdawn · 29/12/2021 10:43

This would drive me bonkers.

People seemed to have forgotten that their risk tolerance isn't other people's. also their risk factors aren't others and are happy to put others at risk for their own pleasure and enjoyment.

I would be having a word stern word tbh. This pandemic has really have really brought out the selfishness of others. The phase "I'm alright jack" springs to mind

JellyBabiesSaveLives · 29/12/2021 10:44

Well you’d be much less likely to “get it from anywhere” than from a friend you shared a car and a table with so that’s a bit ridiculous x2boys. You’d also be much less likely to “get it from anywhere” if everyone who has symptoms tested and self-isolated!

Rant away OP, your friend was selfish and stupid, and I’m sorry that it means you can’t see your family.

Original poster
Christmas20021 · 29/12/2021 10:46

@x2boys

Well your friend is irresponsible,but tbh you could also have picked up COVID in the restaurant or the taxi So either you stay home untill we are over this wave or accept you can get it from anywhere .

That's exactly the response I would get if I raised it with her!

OP posts:
middleager · 29/12/2021 10:47

I met my friends for lunch.
Later that day my son tested positive - no symptoms, he was testing for school.

I tested positive the following morning.
The first thing I did was text my friends and apologise - even though I hadn't a clue at the time we had Covid in the house.

Fortunately, my friends were fine, but even so, my first reaction was to contact them even though there had been nothing suspect to consider when we met. On that badis alone, this is poor behaviour by your friend.

x2boys · 29/12/2021 10:50

@JellyBabiesSaveLives

Well you’d be much less likely to “get it from anywhere” than from a friend you shared a car and a table with so that’s a bit ridiculous x2boys. You’d also be much less likely to “get it from anywhere” if everyone who has symptoms tested and self-isolated!

Rant away OP, your friend was selfish and stupid, and I’m sorry that it means you can’t see your family.

The point is it's everywhere ,my kids tested positive last week ,so our Xmas plans were cancelled too ,but as there are currently no extra restrictions in England ,than it's a chance you take every time you go out .
Original poster
Christmas20021 · 29/12/2021 10:52

And to add, if she hasn't have had (fairly classic) symptoms and we'd have spent time together I would absolutely not be cross/miffed/fuckingfurious ...

Even if we go on to catch it, it totally would be 'one of those things' if she hadn't have come out coughing and spluttering all over us!

We have been really sensible throughout, masks, isolating where necessary, twice weekly PCRs (stipulated by our jobs) this makes it even more annoying.

OP posts:
Original poster
Christmas20021 · 29/12/2021 10:54

@middleager

I met my friends for lunch. Later that day my son tested positive - no symptoms, he was testing for school.

I tested positive the following morning.
The first thing I did was text my friends and apologise - even though I hadn't a clue at the time we had Covid in the house.

Fortunately, my friends were fine, but even so, my first reaction was to contact them even though there had been nothing suspect to consider when we met. On that badis alone, this is poor behaviour by your friend.

That would be me! absolutely no need to bear any guilt in your scenario though.

I hope you're recovered/recovering

OP posts:
Alisonb1234 · 29/12/2021 11:05

I would be really angry at your friend, FFS. I don't understand this 'its not covid' attitude when you haven't tested. A guy at work came in after spending the night with a terrible headache and an awful cough, oh but it doesn't feel like covid (never had it before) and didn't want to waste my last LFT! I could have punched him. I couldn't be friends with someone that thick and selfish tbh.

Blubells · 29/12/2021 11:16

she assured us it wasn't Covid

That's the main problem here - your 'friend' lying to you!

Blubells · 29/12/2021 11:18

I couldn't be friends with her lying line this.

Regarding covid (which you could have caught easily at the Restaurant anyway) hopefully you and your family won't catch it or only mildly.

grapewine · 29/12/2021 11:22

It's the lying.

TooWicked · 29/12/2021 11:24

Oh come on, yeah sure you can catch it anywhere but the friend has gone out, with covid symptoms, having not done a lateral flow test and lied to the people whose company she is in - she assured us it wasn't Covid.

She’s a selfish lying twat and I’d be telling her so.

TooWicked · 29/12/2021 11:25

Regarding covid (which you could have caught easily at the Restaurant anyway)

Fuckwits like this “friend” are the reason people at the restaurant will catch it easily.

beentoldcomputersaysno · 29/12/2021 11:32

@JellyBabiesSaveLives

Well you’d be much less likely to “get it from anywhere” than from a friend you shared a car and a table with so that’s a bit ridiculous x2boys. You’d also be much less likely to “get it from anywhere” if everyone who has symptoms tested and self-isolated!

Rant away OP, your friend was selfish and stupid, and I’m sorry that it means you can’t see your family.

This. The 'you could get it from anyone' argument is also used as an excuse to go out when symptomatic, do nothing to mitigate risks in schools etc. I'd be livid too OP. Bit like 'we are all going to get it anyway' so let's make that true!
grapewine · 29/12/2021 11:33

@TooWicked

Regarding covid (which you could have caught easily at the Restaurant anyway)

Fuckwits like this “friend” are the reason people at the restaurant will catch it easily.

Exactly. It would piss me off.
rainrainraincamedowndowndown · 29/12/2021 11:33

I think she's irresponsible, but as the virus is so contagious, you really can't avoid it unless you completely hide away from the outside world.
Even reading just MN, so many people are proudly saying they won't follow rules, won't test, won't wear masks etc, so with Omicron, no way you can avoid it how careful you are.

Abraxan · 29/12/2021 11:47

@x2boys

Well your friend is irresponsible,but tbh you could also have picked up COVID in the restaurant or the taxi So either you stay home untill we are over this wave or accept you can get it from anywhere .
Well to an extent yes.

But in reality you are far more likely to catch it from someone you are in close contact with for a length of time and who has symptoms (or is covid positive at the time) than you are from a random stranger sat a few metres away or from random strangers in close contact as they pass by you for a few seconds.

By now we all know that the risk is greater when in close face to face contact for several minutes in an unventilated areas.

The risk from a passerby or from someone say much further away is reduced.

In this situation the op is far more likely to catch it from her covid positive friend than a stranger sat a table or two away:

Blubells · 29/12/2021 11:49

Your friend is a twat - lying to you!

But if you had a lunch coming up with a CEV relative, perhaps going to a restaurant beforehand was always a risky strategy? Omicron is literally everywhere right now.

Blubells · 29/12/2021 11:51

than you are from a random stranger sat a few metres away

I'm not sure. Sitting a couple of meters away for a couple of hours in an indoor venue? Omicron seems to be very transmissible.

Original poster
Christmas20021 · 29/12/2021 12:25

You're right, I took a risk by going to a restaurant, but I think that's a reasonably low risk (it's not crowded with good ventilation and has spaced out tables) If symptomatic people stay at home then the risk is even lower, given that asymptomatic people are less likely to transmit the virus.

I'm reasonably relaxed about Covid as we have to 'get on' with life, but I like to think I take sensible precautions

OP posts:
Kshhuxnxk · 29/12/2021 12:27

Yeah, I'd kick her whilst she was down. Might make her think!

OldaRailer · 29/12/2021 12:40

Selfish.