Something just occurred to me

[Lifeisnteasy]

For so many people, this will be their last Christmas without them realising car crashes, sudden illness, accidents, violence.

Yet we’re being told by so many people that it’s ‘just one day’ and that covid takes priority as usual.

I know there aren’t any restrictions as such, but I’m getting so fed up of this competitive Puritanism where people make out special events and socialising are indulgent luxuries that we should happily forgo for the sake of ‘the public’ or ‘the NHS’.

Feeling down today.

I felt like that all the way through this pandemic.

Those that said they couldn't visit their parents/grandparents because of covid just made me think but what if this is the last time you see them. Made me both cross and sad when care homes stopped everyone from visiting.

No one knows what is round the corner, covid or not. I do think you have to balance risk correctly. If not passing covid on is top of the list then fine but equally missing Christmas with someone who may not see the next one should have the final say on whether they want to risk it or not by having visitors.

For so many people, this will be their last Christmas without them realising sad car crashes, sudden illness, accidents, violence.

You could say that about any/every day. Should we party every day just in case it's our last?

Or if that's too facetious for you, there will always be people who are always terminally ill, so Christmas might be their last.

Last year was my nan's last Christmas and she spent it alone. I was going to pick her up and take her to my parents, but Christmas was cancelled.

I wasn't able to spend it with her as my housemate had bubbled with her single dad son for child care.

I'm gutted for my nan and my mum who is so sad this year that last year was wasted.

You could say that about any/every day. Should we party every day just in case it's our last?

No, but it may make us think twice about cancelling (for the second year for many) an important celebration with family/friends.

Isn't that fairly obvious?

@Lifeisnteasy

For so many people, this will be their last Christmas without them realising car crashes, sudden illness, accidents, violence.

Yet we’re being told by so many people that it’s ‘just one day’ and that covid takes priority as usual.

I know there aren’t any restrictions as such, but I’m getting so fed up of this competitive Puritanism where people make out special events and socialising are indulgent luxuries that we should happily forgo for the sake of ‘the public’ or ‘the NHS’.

Feeling down today.

I learned this at 11 when a lovely policeman came to our house... I missed half of my secondary induction day at my dad's funeral.

This is why I value quality of life over longevity for the sake if it.
This is why I resent having so much stolen from two years of good life... it's not just a low-Covid risk, it's that anything random can happen at any point and it's best to maximise the stable, healthy times.

DS1 is now at the age I was when I lost my parent. What does he have to show for the past two years? He's lost so many wider family connections for various reasons (distance, vulnerability, care home rules, excessive fear). DS2 doesn't even remember half his family because since he was 6, they've just been names or photos.

@BogRollBOGOF

So true, sorry you lost your dad so young.

I have a friend in his 70's who disagrees with general lockdowns now there's vaccines on the grounds he believes life is for living, the vulnerable should be supported financially and practically to shield the rest of us should be allowed to make our own decisions. He isn't against different rules for vaccine refusers (medical grounds excepted) though. We had lunch yesterday, he's quite fatalistic and says when his time is up so be it, but he's not spending what is probably his last 3-4 good years (hes 77) hiding now he's vaccinated

It's not as simple as just what's important though with all the covid considerations and restrictions. I'm an only child and have a BF of over 30 years. I think of him as my brother and we've supported each other with all kinds of stuff over the years. We cancelled our usual pre Christmas celebration as we are both spending the actual day with older relatives.

He's really important to me and it's another small sadness and fingers crossed we have many more years to celebrate together. We don't know that though. Last year we managed a walk and a coffee in a park. (Obviously we've seen each other over the summer etc but I'm talking specifically about Christmas)

I agree with you. I know people die everyday but Christmas acts a bit of a marker in the year and a day that most people spend as a family and see as a nice occasion. I was thinking earlier about the 40 odd christmases I have experienced and who was present at each one, not in a depressing way, but just in the sense of how life moves on and how we should try to get a bit more enjoyment out it

I agree with you. I know people die everyday but Christmas acts a bit of a marker in the year and a day that most people spend as a family and see as a nice occasion. I was thinking earlier about the 40 odd christmases I have experienced and who was present at each one, not in a depressing way, but just in the sense of how life moves on and how we should try to get a bit more enjoyment out it

Christ, must you?

@LadyCleathStuart

I agree OP.

But you will get the doomsday lot on saying how they would rather never see their relatives again than risk the tiny chance that they should die of Covid. Forgetting the hundreds of other things that kill people every day. As long as you are 'safe' from that one virus then that is all that matters.

It is especially sad for the elderly people in care homes, who might pass away from a number of other issues but lets have them sit alone with no visitors because potentially dying of Covid would be so much worsr than anything else.

Exactly.

I have said similar since the very start and been called a murderer amongst other things!

I genuinely believe that people have collectively lost their minds over this.

People will look back in horror at some things that went on during covid.
Care Homes being one of them. People being denied support through death and bereavement. Children being treated like they don't matter.
1st Christmases missed, Children only really belive in Santa for a few short years, and for GPS to miss that is just mean.

I think so too @Lockdownbear

Anyone who isn’t very elderly or CEV treated like their lives, mental health, finances, happiness doesn’t matter, and they should willingly sacrifice years of their lives in order to protect strangers, and if not they’re SELFISH
The incalculable emotional cost - divorces, domestic violence, mistreated children being hidden by the lockdowns, not seeing relatives, fathers missing their children’s births, babies not meeting their relatives, people’s everyday interactions limited to zoom, the social anxiety, kids not seeing their friends for months at a time, the suicides
The financial implications - if we were just dragging ourselves back from austerity, this has basically wiped out any hope of having a flourishing economy and properly funded public services for another 20 years. More problems.
All for a virus with a 99% survival rate

I can’t bear to think about it if I’m honest

@BogRollBOGOF so sorry about your dad. And a very poignant example of how quality matters - every day.

I sometimes wonder if I am in another universe when I read threads on here.

I remember one where they said their mum wanted a hug and they refused incase they gave her covid (no indication that they even had covid) and her mum cried. That is selfish in my mind because they only cared about them and not the fact that their mum needed a hug and was clearly distraught at not getting one. It's all about protecting others from covid even if that harms those they are supposedly protecting in other ways.

This is a horrible thread because it is so judgemental. What you call competitive puritanism, OP, is people protecting themselves. Why should you judge people? Actually, this Christmas, unless you were planning to go abroad, you can pretty much do what you want. So crack on. But enough with the judgement.
By the way, it'll be two years in March. February 2020 was totally normal in the UK. If you want to feel sorry for yourself, round up. Otherwise, it's not two years.

Always remember Piers Morgan for weeks on GMB last December screaming ar people to stay at home over Christmas. "It's only one Christmas dinner" etc.

It then turned off he sodded off with his family to the Carribean and tried to keep it quiet.

"All for a virus with a 99% survival rate".
Yeah, but what if you think you and yours are in the 1%? And what about long covid?

@BligeMe

"All for a virus with a 99% survival rate". Yeah, but what if you think you and yours are in the 1%? And what about long covid?

Then I would take the precautions necessary to protect myself/my family member. I wouldn’t expect the rest of the country to join in in solidarity.

As for long covid 🤷🏼‍♀️ I’m chronically ill myself, it’s just a fact of life sometimes.

I spent the first lockdown spending much need quality time with my immediate family. We had just come to the end of a stressful period and I had gone pat time/semi retired. I thought optimistically that 2021 would see normality return and it was a much more difficult year. DS 17 caught up in the whole gcse/alevel debacle.
Then I was diagnosed with breast cancer. My first thoughts were how much if my potential last two years of life were wasted being holed up due to Covid.
My DS17 has suffered mental health issues and is a continual source of concern especially with the added stress of my illness.
I finished treatment a couple of weeks ago so although we are having a very small Christmas we are looking forward to 2022 and hoping that life will return to normal so I can get on with living. I have been given a good prognosis but the experience has left me feeling less inclined to worry about everyone else. I have met a number of people as a result of cancer for whom this will be their last Christmas and it’s not fair that the only lives that seem to count at the moment are the Covid susceptible.

@Angrymum22 💐 and thank goodness your prognosis is looking good. I can only imagine how this last couple of years have been for you, I really hope 2022 sees a return to sanity and proper living.

This is so depressing

@SpiderFluff

This is so depressing

I know 😞

All I can add is to say- GPs are bloody well still seeing patients face to face, once a telephone appointment has been had & determined they need examination!