Disagreement with DH: I don’t feel safe staying with PILS.

[JarvisCockersRightEyebrow]

I’ll try to keep this short! I am in the third trimester of a scary high risk pregnancy and I’ve had one vaccine. Second one due after Christmas.

DH and I were due to spend Christmas itself with my parents, they live just the two of them, and have been isolating for 10 days, not because they’ve had covid, but because it was decided that was the best way to minimise risk and make things as safe as they can be for me. We’re all taking daily LFT.

We were due to stay at PILs for a few days over New Year. We didn’t ask PIL to isolate, which is on us, (didn’t ask mine to either) but it didn’t occur to me that they’d be doing quite so much socialising over Christmas. We had already talked about their plans for Christmas, but yesterday they mentioned that they’re in fact seeing numerous relatives and other people over Christmas and in the days right before we’d be due to stay there. Perhaps this is my fault, but it genuinely didn’t occur to me that they’d want to see so many people. It’s unusual for them.

Huge row with DH ensues, as I said I don’t feel comfortable with this level of extra risk, and I don’t want to stay with PIL now. DH obviously does want to. It’s all still totally unresolved.

What would you do in my shoes?

My second vaccine is due just after Christmas. My consultant advised me not to have the first vaccine until later in the second trimester due to my medical issues.

@JarvisCockersRightEyebrow

My second vaccine is due just after Christmas. My consultant advised me not to have the first vaccine until later in the second trimester due to my medical issues.

Yes, I remember this was the advice back then.

Good luck. I think you should stay home and rest, too. Don't put yourself at risk of needing urgent ante-natal / medical care in the new year - it could be chaos.

I think there will be restrictions announced anyway, probably starting very soon after Christmas Day.

Put your foot down, OP. I was in a similar situation last week and we ended up going, one of the family then tested positive a day after we got home. It’s been very stressful - if I had been in my third trimester I would have been out of my mind with worry.

You could find that restrictions come in which prevent you from going anyway!

If your pregnancy is very high risk and the reason why you’re so behind on your vaccinations is consultant lead, then I wouldn’t go at all I’d be shielding. It’s been many many months now since the advice to the majority of pregnant women was to get vaccinated, and the time between doses has been cut significantly since the vaccine program started. Are you only just into the third trimester? It seems unreasonable that you haven’t managed to get two doses in yet. I have an autoimmune condition and had 6 weeks between my first two doses, and I’ve just had a fourth exactly twelve weeks after my third.