Working from home

[MistySkiesAfterRain]

I live alone and we have obviously all been told to work from home again. I was only going in once a week, but that one day was essential.

My brain really struggles mid week otherwise. There just isn't enough stimulation, visual or aural.

I sort of start to get FOMO, but worse, like the sort of feeling of there being a party going on in another room and you didn't go because you were in a bad mood but now you feel bad as you did really want to go but no one is going to come and convince you as you gave the don't want to vibe so you somehow have to get the courage to go and make it nonchalant like it was all cool.

Basically I hate wfh full time. I've been going to a cafe on most days as I can't bear it, but I don't actually talk to people there.

I think I might go and do an early morning spin class mid week. At least someone will talk at me, plus if I sit near the back you can almost get away with chatting to your neighbour.

I'm also contemplating changing career to something more sociable, but this feels a bit drastic.

Is your work specifically telling people they are not allowed in?

Well they said they are shutting the office therefore reinstating wfh. And there has to be 2 ppl at a time minimum. Is the wording important?

Ask if they will allow people to come on for welfare reasons. My office will be fully wfh from Monday, but open for those who need to come in for welfare reasons - unsuitable wfh space at home, need the interaction /physical separation of home and work for mental health reasons etc

If 2 people can go in does anyone else feel the same? I'm happy doing either to be honest but we have someone in the team who struggles mentally with wfh so i have been in days no one else has so he can go in.

Yes I am with you.

We are not closing the office and people can absolutely go in for welfare reasons. We are encouraging people to scale back attendance though.
It is still not the same as actual go to work to work of course.

Many offices are accommodating people for welfare reasons. We have several people who need to be in the office for similar reasons to you and a couple whose loving circumstances (house share) don’t allow for home working and we have a rota system in place.

I would ask and see what can be done.

WFH doesn't suit everybody I did it in the first lockdown and hated every second of it I did change jobs to a different sector to be able to leave the home for work. I did take a pay cut but it wasn't a significant one and I can cope financially. All the money in the world couldn't convince me to wfh again, my mental health and well-being has improved so much even if my bank balance is pitiful.
Speak to your line manager to see if there's any provision to keep doing what you do now or If they can offer an alternative

My performance is quite shit at the moment, mainly as I lost motivation over the summer. We really dragged our heels over reopening and it wasnt until September. So I am behind and people are shouting at me. So I am loathe to put my hand up about welfare reasons.

I honestly think they will use it as a reason to get rid of me.

I started just before lockdown and then went into lockdown and literally no one asked how I was or bothered to arrange my inductions with key people. I was just given loads of work. I still haven't quite recovered from that.

I'm also pretty sure they'll say we have a duty of care to keep everyone safe.

I'm looking into a local hot desk. Or alternatively a morning gym class and maybe a monthly personal training session. To be honest I have started working in Wetherspoons, its soooo nice having the hub bub noise of people around. I do buy food and drink there too. They don't seem to mind me being there all day.

If they shut everything down again though I honestly don't know how I will cope. It just feels like everyone else seems to have some kind of better way of coping than me. I don't want to do bloody online classes which is what work will suggest. I want to see an actual physical person and have an actual face to face conversation on a Wednesday in the middle of the week. They all have families or housemates or caring responsibilities. I have some of those but parents are either 400 miles away, work in the evening or take place at weekends.

I know it's not easy, but as they seem unsupportive on the whole is it worth looking for another job? I'm sure you have transferable skills etc, during lockdown an employer who wasn't supportive and making sure staff were okay work wise and welfare wise is a huge red flag. Having good management is such a difference, and by that I don't mean always doing what you want or whatever, but finding a way to support that works for you and the business.

I don't think my reference would be great if I leave atm. I'm trying to turn it round and enlisting a life coach in the new year. I aslo cant really find any jobs atm (niche area) but maybe there will be more after xmas.

Would your office consider getting a HEPA filter? It's a reasonable mitigation and balance, that could count towards taking measures to keep staff safe (mentally as well as physically).

It's a real shame the government didn't continue easier mitigations all along - masks, vaccine passes, wider use of HEPA filters, in a better attempt to avoid WFH.

However I agree with Tabbacus
Hopefully you'll find more decent opportunities in the new year. A good workplace should be supportive, and have understanding of and respect for the welfare needs of its employees.

Hi, I absolutely WOULD mention to your manager, and restate the circumstances of your onboarding (just as lockdown started, not organised at work etc). And ask what can they suggest to prevent things getting worse now you are wfh again? This is your manager's actual job to solve: you know you can't do your best work every day at this job because of the circumstances.

My DH is a manager (total team of about 150 pple) and as soon as the total lockdowns ended, the office opened for welfare reasons, to permit people struggling with MH (eg had been alone for months) to be in the office a few days a week. About 8 people turn up each day, LFT has to be evidenced each time even now. Very safe.

Meantime I would definitely look for a new job. And if you get one, when you start take the bull by the horns: set up video-on meetings with everyone you can think of worth meeting, and be ballsy - suggest having an online coffee chat with colleagues now and then, or sharing a team lunch hour. It is a good way to connect, not better than a physical presence, but good. One of my beat friends lives in Australia and we met through work, didnt meet physically for the first 5 years of our friendship. Online work friendships can be a lot of fun too.

I'm a manager in a new job, I make a point to call all the new hires (even the ones not in my team) every few days to check in. I'm pretty shocked at how you were left floundering I'm your role - that's horrible bad management, pretty inhuman actually - and I would leave that job asap.

Thanks @NotTheGrinchAgain, I agree about taking the bull by its horns.

MistySkiesAfterRain I feel the same. I work in Local Govt & have been WFH pretty much since the first lockdown. I HATE it & I'm really struggling. I work full time so I just sit in front of my laptop for 7-8 hours a day. I may occasionally have a Teams meeting but that's only once/twice a week at best.
I've got plenty of work to do but I'm so fed up of not being able to get anything done because people ignore my emails & phone calls. Before Covid, if I needed to speak to someone about work I would just walk up to them & talk to them. Now, I email them & they don't get back to me or I phone them & they don't answer. I actually think that WFH will become the norm because it suits managers as now they can control who they speak to!
I've also got a lot of issues going on at home right now &, if I want to sit at home all day & mull those over in my head then I have nothing to distract me. I can't go & make a cup of tea & have a chat with someone while the kettle's boiling or walk into town at lunchtime. I can't ask them what they're watching on telly right now. I just sit there & catastrophize about things that are going on at home or what's been reported on the news.
When I made my career choice, it was because I wanted to be with people & feel like I was making a difference in people's lives. Now I just stare at a laptop screen for 40 hours a week & think 'this is my life now'.