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Original poster

DS tested positive- allowing him in shared living space

113 replies

LuckyVal · 23/10/2021 01:55

Hi all,
I’m just wondering when your children have tested positive if you have all done your best to keep them separated from the rest of the family?

DS10 tested positive on an LFT on Wednesday. He had a headache and was a little bit sniffly. It was confirmed on a PCR tonight that he is positive.
Since the LFT I haven’t kept him isolated in his room. I’m in such a head spin about it as know I should have done but he was inconsolable when he found out. He is missing out on so much that was planned for half term, including seeing his cousins who we’ve now not seen for 15 months. He was also very emotional yesterday for the whole day, which I think is part of him being run down. To then separate him from the rest of us by confining him to his bedroom for 10 days felt too much.

I’ve tried where possible to keep him and DD separate. They’ve spent a lot of today in separate rooms anyway and when they have been in the same space (watching tv for example), they’ve kept as distanced as possible - but it’s not a large room. We’ve had windows open and I’ve been reminding him not to touch anything and sanitising anything he has including toilet flush, light switch, taps etc
I feel like I’ve been irresponsible by not confining him, but at the same time I can’t risk the emotional toll it would further take on him to be separated from us all.
I’ve also cuddled him when he was sobbing- but how could I not?!
😫😭

OP posts:
Waxonwaxoff0 · 23/10/2021 06:12

I was the one who caught Covid first but no I absolutely did not distance from my child and would not under any circumstances unless there was someone extremely high risk at home.

Whataday21 · 23/10/2021 06:13

Oh my goodness, no! Dc8 has it and we have carried on as normal. I can't imagine wearing a mask round her or telling her not to touch anything and wiping down. She would have felt really stressed out by that. The ten day isolation is hard enough for them. We have totally carried on as normal. We are double jabbed. Covid is literally everywhere, if it's your turn, it's your turn, and fingers crossed.

PackedintheUK · 23/10/2021 06:18

I did my best to "socially distance" within the house. We still shared meals etc but tried to stay 2m apart and lots of handwashing/cleaning of door handles etc.

Of four of us, 3 caught it, but I suspect DH had it before we knew I was positive.

I wouldn't isolate properly within a household unless there was someone particularly vulnerable.

Original poster
LuckyVal · 23/10/2021 07:51

Thank you. You’ve all made me feel a lot better. I have two friends who’s children currently have it, one is 10 one is 14, both are in their rooms so it made me question what I’m doing.
DS has said he would stay in his room if we want, he’s very sensible so would understand even if it was hard on him, but he did add that the internet is rubbish in there! Grin It’s just reassuring to know that you all have said the same.
I was half expecting a load of replies saying I’m being irresponsible. I work in a school so luckily am off next week anyway. DH will continue to go out to work but has kept his distance more.

OP posts:
LivinLaVidaLoki · 23/10/2021 08:01

@WholeClassKeptIn

Wow Im surprised st people isolating tbier 10 and 12 year olds from the family.

Not only are they ill but they are struggling feeling apart from the family . Unless someone is ecv in the family I think that's pretty cruel. Its the sort of thig they will remember forever.

I was about to post the same @WholeClassKeptIn I've 2 relatives who's children have had it (8,7 and 5) and they are constantly on social media posting about how heartbreaking it is that they can't hug them while they're poorly and having to keep their distance from them So many "it's hard but you're doing the right thing hun" posts. Honestly I think it's just bloody cruel but maybe I'm in the minority.
Whybirdwhy · 23/10/2021 08:03

Non- CEV people are really isolating their children from their families for 10 days? Fucking hell. This really is not necessary imo.

notasillysausage · 23/10/2021 08:03

My DS8, DD1 and DH are all positive. Just me and my DD4 are negative at the moment. No isolating going on here.

MarcelineMissouri · 23/10/2021 08:04

It is crazy to me that people are doing this. Looking after your kids (including emotionally) when they’re ill is part and parcel of being a parent. Do we leave them to get on with it when they have noro?

As a pp said, chances are we’re all going to get it eventually, probably multiple times, so what’s the point in shutting your kids away when they have it?

clockover · 23/10/2021 08:05

I’ve been reminding him not to touch anything and sanitising anything he has including toilet flush, light switch, taps etc

I would just go in at the back of a 10 year old and wipe things down. I don't see much benefit in making them feel worse when they are unwell.

Simplelobsterhat · 23/10/2021 08:07

My dd 11 has it at the moment and we decided it wasn't feasible for her to isolate, emotionally or practically. We've been opening windows a lot and not sitting right up next to her to reduce viral load and warned her not to cuddle little brother, wash hands lots, use seperate hand towel etc. Now her brother, 6, has it and its even harder to isolate from him as we generally cuddle him more due to age, sit on his bed to read stories etc, help him with more things, so I'm glad we didn't enforce isolating on her or it would then seem unfair not to do it to him.
I don't think her isolating would have stopped him getting it as he was only 2 days behind so probably caught it before we even knew she had it.
I'm wfh for the time they are ill and DH works alone outside, so hopefully we aren't spreading it about too much. I might have been stricter before we were vaccinated as I would have been more worried about us catching it than I am now.

Vallmo47 · 23/10/2021 08:09

I’d never isolate from my children, no matter what they had. My DD9 recently had covid and I became positive the following day, meaning I’d already caught it before I even knew she had it. I wouldn’t change a thing. Mu husband kept a bit of distance in a discreet way but she asked for a cuddle a couple times and they snuggled under blanket together on sofa. We never had good ventilation either. My husband and her older brother didn’t catch it, despite them even sharing towels on a couple of occasions. If covid wants you, covid comes for you. It’s possible to even cuddle covid positive and not catch it, it’s truly just one of those things. Hope everyone is better soon.

MrsBungle · 23/10/2021 08:09

My 12yo had Covid a couple of weeks ago. No way was I confining her to her room. I gave her lots of cuddles as she didn’t feel well. None of the rest of us got it which was surprising but I’d have rather she passed it on to me then confine her away from everyone. She was an unwell child. Unless someone else in the family is CEV I don’t understand it at all when parents are distancing from their children.

TheTurn0fTheScrew · 23/10/2021 08:09

10 yo DD2 has tested positive, the rest of us are negative. We're not isolating from her, and cuddles are free flowing. Although our house is so small that it would be pretty meaningless anyway. I'm encouraging lots of handwashing, opening windows a crack in every room, and she's banned from the kitchen, which she's thrilled about as she's off the dishwasher and tea making rotas.

user1000000000009 · 23/10/2021 08:09

Dh and dd tested positive. Ds and I negative.

We all shared the same spaces, didn't isolate from each other at all.

Bagelsandbrie · 23/10/2021 08:16

There is no way on earth I’d isolate my 10 year old child away from the rest of the family. Shock We’d all just carry on as normal and whatever happens, happens - I’m in the clinically extremely vulnerable group (double vaccinated) too so it’s not like I don’t have risks but there’s no way I could do that to a child, I’d feel incredibly cruel.

mumonthehill · 23/10/2021 08:17

When ds 14 tested positive after DH did neither isolated in the house, both felt unwell and needed company and comfort. I could never have made ds stay in his room alone while he felt poorly, it would have been so cruel. I did not catch it.

InTheLabyrinth · 23/10/2021 08:21

It was different, as the whole household had to isolate for close contact, but we didnt separate dS(12) from the rest of us. We did open windows, and were careful with hygiene. But I also shared a bed with him when he was at his worst. He was really quite ill (without needing a doctor), and mentally it would have been miserable if he had been physically isolated from the rest of us. Noone else got it.

If his brother got it now, I wouldnt isolate him, But I would wear a mask when outside the house, and minimise outings - so work, and a weekly supermarket trip, along with excerise.

Stuffin · 23/10/2021 08:24

I never isolated from DH and he is obviously an adult.

IrishMamaMia · 23/10/2021 08:24

That's so rubbish at half-term.
My children are young and when my son had it, it would have been silly to isolate, we'd already shared so much contact.
I agree about it being cruel if no one is at risk, I actually think it's following rules to a level that is insane and harmful. It reminds me of reading horrible things that people did under communism and nazism as they were following the rules.
If you think about it, there are no restrictions in society so you or your kids could pick it up when you return to school anyway.

EmeraldShamrock · 23/10/2021 08:27

All wear a mask around the home, wash hands regularly, sanitize areas, let him mingle from a reasonable distance with the family.
I don't know how you are expected to isolate a DC alone.

Milkbottlelegs · 23/10/2021 08:32

I wouldn’t make them isolate within the house, but I might feel differently if I had to go out to work as I’d feel terrible if I then passed it onto others. If anyone in my house tests positive I would revert to wfh, I’m lucky I can do that though.

Iggly · 23/10/2021 08:35

If your DC has covid then you can also get a PCR test as a close contact. I would do the same. And I wouldn’t isolate them

CloseYourEyesAndSee · 23/10/2021 08:38

I did not expect my DS to do anything different at home when he had covid and I never would. What would be the point of that? Other children in the house might get it but is that really an issue? Unless you're particularly vulnerable why would you be so worried about catching it?

Luzina · 23/10/2021 08:38

I didn’t isolate my 13yo. He was really ill, he needed me to look after him. My husband had a positive pcr but no symptoms, the rest of us didn’t get it which really surprised me. I think I probably should have isolated with my 13yo to protect the rest of my family but it would have been impractical

SwanShaped · 23/10/2021 08:39

I wouldn’t ever isolate anyone one in my family. It’s a horrible thing to do. Particularly to a child who is ill