Here we go again with the sending home and testing

[WeNeedToGetThroughThis]

DD back to school on Thursday just gone. Came out Friday fine. Developed a cough and temp on Sunday so off I go to get tested.

This happened in the autumn term last year and she ended up with less than 60% attendance, any cough, cold, or virus going round she gets a temperature and or a cough, always has. This time of year it feels like she’s off school more than she’s in without adding covid to the mix. I haven’t sent her in as school would only turn her round at the gates. We've had times where she'll be in for a day or two and be out again for another test because her coughs got worse or her temperatures risen again, school won't let her back without a negative test so it's test or nothing.

I’ll do what I have to do to get her back into school but I just feel defeated by it all. My work won’t be happy and I’ll have to take the day unpaid as I’ve literally gone back after using Annual Leave to cover the summer holidays.

Seriosuly considering pulling her from school but she’s already behind; can’t read, can write but it doesn’t make much sense (letter formation is perfect but the words are unreadable as even when told spellings she gets it wrong), can’t count above 20, can’t do any times tables etc.

She’s 7 and year 3, it just feels like she’s never going to catch up if she’s never in school.

I would ask to have a meeting with her form teacher and head.

She does sound behind where she should be and even if she has to test for a cough you all need a plan going forward.

And can her dad share the time off work with you?

@frozendaisy

And can her dad share the time off work with you?

No, I'm a single parent. CAO in place due to DV from him, he has her 27 nights a year only.

@frozendaisy

I would ask to have a meeting with her form teacher and head.

She does sound behind where she should be and even if she has to test for a cough you all need a plan going forward.

It's the headteacher that makes the choice to send kids home not individual class teachers so I doubt it'll do much. When I discussed it with her she said DD wasn't the only one in this position but it's local council policy to have a negative test for any new symptoms.

What’s the school supposed to do? I wouldn’t want my child in a classroom with another child with those symptoms who hadn’t been tested. I wouldn’t want to be teaching a child who’s coughing everywhere untested. Not sure there’s anything anyone can do really.

@CarrieBlue

What’s the school supposed to do? I wouldn’t want my child in a classroom with another child with those symptoms who hadn’t been tested. I wouldn’t want to be teaching a child who’s coughing everywhere untested. Not sure there’s anything anyone can do really.

I'm not annoyed at school about it, I get it and feel the same. It's just frustrating that my DD is more prone to picking things up so her attendance suffers. I'm also desperately worried, we're in a 3 tier area so she's in her final 2 years at this school, if she;s not caught up soon I have no idea how she'll manage at middle school where there's no TA support and she's in a 5 or 7 form entry school.

I think you need to really look at not counting above 20 as surely that is possible from around 5/6 at latest. And i think that is unrelated to all the time off school. What happens if you count steps or hair brushes etc?I
Re the coughs our family has the same issue. Could it be asthma?
Vit d supposedly reduces colds and flu. Could she be deficient from suntan lotion etc?

@HSHorror

I think you need to really look at not counting above 20 as surely that is possible from around 5/6 at latest. And i think that is unrelated to all the time off school. What happens if you count steps or hair brushes etc?I Re the coughs our family has the same issue. Could it be asthma? Vit d supposedly reduces colds and flu. Could she be deficient from suntan lotion etc?

She literally always picks up coughs and colds, doesn't matter what it is she'll get it. A child can have a slight cold on the opposite side of the classroom to her, she'll get it. She is diagnosed asthmatic but is usually well managed and doesn't have a cough with it.

She will attempt to count above 20 but gets the numbers muddle so she'll go 20, 23, 13, or similar. School have been trying with her but if she misses too much she'll get further behind. It's a big worry for me.

This is really tough on those children who produce a cough at so much as a passing glance at a virus.

My older children were like this and outgrew it with time but of course they got through the early years at school with a bit of cough syrup and a supportive nudge into school.

But is sucks, op. Your dc deserves an education just as much as all the other kids in the class who can shake off a bug without a cough.

Tbh, your daughter sounds in need of extra intervention on top of normal school attendance as she will need support to catch up - simply being in school every day won't cut it as the gap between and her peers will continue to widen. I would speak to the school about applying for an ehcp for her. Part of this process is an assessment of her needs and she will be seem by an educational psychologist who might be able to spot why she's struggling and suggest appropriate strategies. If school are unwilling you can apply for an ehcp yourself

@StinkyCarpetWoes

Tbh, your daughter sounds in need of extra intervention on top of normal school attendance as she will need support to catch up - simply being in school every day won't cut it as the gap between and her peers will continue to widen. I would speak to the school about applying for an ehcp for her. Part of this process is an assessment of her needs and she will be seem by an educational psychologist who might be able to spot why she's struggling and suggest appropriate strategies. If school are unwilling you can apply for an ehcp yourself

We're in the process of getting one but the council have rejected the application so it's looking likely we'll have to go to tribunal which they're saying could take a year.

Get her to count at home, and try teaching reading yourself. I started my granddaughter on the magnetic letters with a tray - recognising letters first, then onto two letter words such as 'it, is, me, he, on, etc, then three letter words with the same vowels such as 'hat, mat, rat, cat etc.
She's almost 8 now and a has a reading age of about 11.
She's not so good with maths but her parents make sure she practises tables on mum's phone. There are loads of times tables apps. Or get worksheets from Twinkl.
I appreciate that you won't have much time as a single parent, but if you can squeeze in some home practice, it would help your daughter to catch up even if she has to miss some school. Good luck.

As previous poster said, Vitamin D. OP, it sounds like she's pretty behind.

What are your financial situation and work schedule like? If money and time allowed, I'd be shelling out for some tutoring (remote if that's the only practical option with all this isolation) and doing work at home with her in between sessions. I appreciate that you're a single parent and this may be tough though.

Do you think she struggles with learning, or is it more a case of, she's missed loads of school and not made up for it at home?

I'm so sorry that you're both going through this.

I'm assuming the challenges she has with learning pre date Coronavirus, and she would have had the whole of reception before Coronavirus. What was her learning like in reception?

Have you looked at how to improve her immune system through diet? Eg probiotcs like live yoghurt (yeo valley do flavoured ones if she won't eat plain, or you can get supplements), eating vegetables as often as possible.

Do you do learning together at home when you're not working? In your position, I'd pay for some online tutoring.

@Kokeshi123 and @AntiHop

Learning in Reception she was ok, she had missed a lot of Nursery for various reasons (not the only one though) so started behind with reading. She took ages to settle and I sometimes had to pick her up at lunchtime because she'd just cry and not calm down. She was always fine at Nursery though so it really surprised me.

Working wise I do an office job but as it's all confidential (not NHS or civil service but a related field) i'm not allowed to work from home. They're usually flexible but most of my colleagues have husbands or partners or involved parents to share the load with so I think sometimes I come across as making issues which others would have solved. My parents are involved but they both work fulltime so can't just drop everything themselves.

Money wise I have enough but there's not much left over, I could probably find a tutor to help out and finance it but it'd mean no holidays or less fun days out but it might be worth it. ExH is supposed to pay maintenance via CMS but does everything he can to get out of it, he stops just long enough for CMS to start a DOE then starts paying again so they stop the process.

We're not sure if the struggles are due to a learning difficulty or because she's lost so much learning time. She wasn't in at all during the closures because I only got my job for the 2nd lockdown, and they furloughed me. We did as much as we could work wise but she definitely struggled with some, in some areas she came on loads, her factual recall and IT skills have improved loads because of the lockdowns.

It’s possible that the abuse you experienced (which she will have witnessed just by living in the same house, at the very least) has traumatised her and that she needs some emotional support, which in turn would boost her learning OP. Have you discussed this possibility with the SENCO?

@JanglyBeads

It’s possible that the abuse you experienced (which she will have witnessed just by living in the same house, at the very least) has traumatised her and that she needs some emotional support, which in turn would boost her learning OP. Have you discussed this possibility with the SENCO?

I'll talk to school about it, her class teacher this year is the SENCO so hopefully it's something we can sort out.

Ok so is she getting not met for maths and reading?
Usually kids would have done the phonics check in yr 1 and again in yr 2 if they dont pass. So i would look at that and try her on that (previous years are on the government website).
I would then try her with a key stage 1 sat paper. For maths and reading as she would have sat this last june.
That is the level of approx 2/3 of the year group.
Reading eggs and mathseeds are good.
Or as she is presumably still on the book bands maybe reading chest so you can get books the right level (our school only give us 2 per week).
If it is a memory issue maybe writing down the numbers on a 100 square might help as the physical writing might help.
I imagine though the school would prioritise listening at school to your dd as they are behind.

@HSHorror

Ok so is she getting not met for maths and reading? Usually kids would have done the phonics check in yr 1 and again in yr 2 if they dont pass. So i would look at that and try her on that (previous years are on the government website). I would then try her with a key stage 1 sat paper. For maths and reading as she would have sat this last june. That is the level of approx 2/3 of the year group. Reading eggs and mathseeds are good. Or as she is presumably still on the book bands maybe reading chest so you can get books the right level (our school only give us 2 per week). If it is a memory issue maybe writing down the numbers on a 100 square might help as the physical writing might help. I imagine though the school would prioritise listening at school to your dd as they are behind.

Below expectations in reading, phonics, handwriting, maths.

She was nowhere near the level needed on the KS1 sats but that was because she didn't answer half the questions, we think because she couldn't read them.

No books being sent home still from school, they're hoping to restart this after half term but it'll only be 1 book a fortnight. I have emailed to ask her reading band as she hasn't had any books home since March 2020. They do read once per half term with the teacher and she's supposed to read once per fortnight with a TA but if she is off school she misses her slot and has to wait until the next time it's her turn, so sometimes she's only reading once or twice per term with the TA and teacher - this is all pre-covid rules apart from the books coming home.

I would def be trying to get a meeting with teacher to discuss
Might they accept negative LFT if it happens very often?
Has she actually had covid? If she had had it then unlikely she'd get it again soon which would offer some reassurance
Feel for you and people in similar situations as a single working parent - sounds very tough

PS not sure what you mean by tier 3 areas, are you in England?

ps the no reading books thing is bonkers. Our school (on the cautious end of the spectrum) has sent reading books home throughout.

But I definitely recommend the reading eggs app (about £6 per month but there is a free trial period). My year 2 son really got on with it in lockdown.

I'm surprised about the reading.

My daughter last year was in year 2.
They were reading with a TA or teacher at least twice a week. And new books nearly every day. And supposed to read with the parent every night.

I would ask for a meeting with school in relation to her attainment.

In our LA, extra teachers have been put in place as part of the Covid recovery plan - this means that children are being taken out in smaller groups with some 1:1 for children who need it.

There needs to be a discussion about how best to meet your daughters needs and also what will happen when she is not at school. For example, can work be sent home with her. Even basic revision.

In the meantime there is lots you can do. Counting doing everyday things, reading every day. To her and with her. Practicing the phonetic sounds over and over again in a fun way.

Locally we have a couple of small private places that offer group tuition for primary aged kids. They do sessions after school and also on Saturdays. I know kids via work who access it and it’s really helped the children. This is something you could consider. It’s great fun for the kids. Lots of learning through play for the wee ones. But also working on specific areas too.

We get one book per fortnight too but we read it most nights at home. Teacher reads with the class twice per week. If your dd is struggling to learn the basics she will need a different approach from her peers