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Original poster

7 year old daughter just tested positive. Work being difficult

112 replies

Plumviolet · 01/09/2021 16:40

My 7yo dd just got a positive corona result yesterday, I'm negative so far and I work full time in a retail environment but obviously can't now send her into childcare anymore so need to stay gone with her to look after her. My mum is vulnerable so I can't even ask her. My work are saying that I have to take unpaid leave to look after her but I am still having to pay the childminder and I can't pay her without a full pay check. What the hell do I do? Where do I stand?

Surely it is not in their interest to have an employee come in who is potentially (highly likely) positive but not officially on a test?

OP posts:
Booknooks · 01/09/2021 19:18

It's ridiculous, and of course they haven't considered that not everyone has an extensive and immediate support network, or that for some going without a wage for 10 days is not feasible. Its such an unfair pressure to put on you as well, knowing that you are being forced in really even though will probably develop covid. I get not isolating for contacts, but if you actually live with someone ffs. I'd look into the £500 grant, although not sure as technically you don't have to isolate now. Sorry OP I'm not sure, but it's shite.

user1487194234 · 01/09/2021 19:22

Whatever you decide don't lie to your employers ,or commit fraud,you don't want to get fired
I am supportive of people in this situation
Worked throughout,no support ,self employed
When DC were home from school I was working from 5 am to midnight so I could help the DC with school work and not leave them to their own devices
But the money should come from the government
Most businesses simply can't afford it

FrownedUpon · 01/09/2021 19:24

I would also have to take unpaid leave. Some people have multiple children-you can’t expect to be paid to be at home looking after them.

Is her Dad around or could you take annual leave.

SilverGlitterBaubles · 01/09/2021 19:28

When people have employers who can't/ won't be flexible and their backs are to the wall financially you can see why some people just won't be participating in testing.

Booknooks · 01/09/2021 19:31

@SilverGlitterBaubles

When people have employers who can't/ won't be flexible and their backs are to the wall financially you can see why some people just won't be participating in testing.
Precisely, I don't blame them to be honest.
Usual2usual · 01/09/2021 19:33

*TheOnlyLivingBoyInNewCross

What do you normally do when she is unwell? If she had chicken pox or a sickness bug or something? How is this situation different?*

Well you know exactly how it is different don't you but I will spell it out anyway - chicken pox and norovirus don't have a 10 day government mandated isolation period. OP isn't choosing to be off for 10 days to look after her child she has to because the child is not allowed to go to school and I can't see many people knocking her door down to look after a covid positive child.

Maybe she should have thought about what she would do in the event of a global pandemic before she had children eh?

Now, back in the real world, OP I really feel for you, I would recommend looking into the grant. This is shit and many parents are going to be facing the same this winter.

Usual2usual · 01/09/2021 19:34

*ugh quote fail.....

BunsyGirl · 01/09/2021 19:37

My former employer (a law firm) won’t even cover sick pay for staff members suffering from Covid…

Remoteso · 01/09/2021 19:38

Too late now but if anyone reading this can't afford unpaid time off then I wouldn't be getting my child tested.

This is where government support really needs to step in.

I would chose to be able feed and house my family over public health concerns every time and I don't believe anyone who says they wouldn't.

Swab your child for a test yourself?

I'm normally a pretty law abiding citizen but this is ridiculous.

BoredZelda · 01/09/2021 20:25

All these pious “ask her father to help” comments.

I’m certain if that was an option, the OP would have thought of it. Why must people always make this kind of dig at single mothers?

caughtinanet · 01/09/2021 20:28

@BoredZelda

All these pious “ask her father to help” comments.

I’m certain if that was an option, the OP would have thought of it. Why must people always make this kind of dig at single mothers?

How is asking aboutthe father taking a dig at a single mother? It's the obvious question to ask, why is this the problem for only one parent?
LovelyLovelyWarmCoffee · 01/09/2021 21:25

A lot of people don’t have family nearby so would have to take time off unpaid or use holiday allowance for norovirus, flu, chicken pox… not 10 days every time but it still adds up!

And as for the «ask her dad» comments, yes OP could be a single parent with an absent ex but she could also be one of the numerous women who always take time off for the children because the dad has a higher paying job and their work «wouldn’t understand» - fair enough and understandable when it is occasionally but when we are talking 10 days at a time you can’t expect the mother’s employer to in effect facilitate the father’s carer, he has to make concessions as well.

Porcupineintherough · 01/09/2021 21:32

@BoredZelda

All these pious “ask her father to help” comments.

I’m certain if that was an option, the OP would have thought of it. Why must people always make this kind of dig at single mothers?

Actually there have been many, many threads on here where couples have refused to countenance the husband taking any time off because "his employer wouldn't like it". So def worth asking the question.
Carrotcakeforbreakfast · 01/09/2021 21:47

I think comparing this to a stomach bug or chickenpox is silly.

The government haven't thought this through.
My neighbours 3 children have all just had covid.
But they all took it in turns. Thankfully my neighbour is a teacher so was at home.
They've been pretty much locked in for 6 weeks.

What would happen if she wasn't a teacher.
6 weeks unpaid leave with a £500 grant. Ridiculous.

I honestly would be getting a positive test myself in this situation.
If I exhausted every other option.

IncessantNameChanger · 01/09/2021 21:59

I think situations like this are going to make some people reticent to test.

My employer would have been ok with WFH or making hours up over time. Pretty impossible if you work in retail or leisure. It's a impossible situation all round

Wellbythebloodyhell · 01/09/2021 22:00

Theres no doubt your in a terrible predicament OP one I'm sure many more will find themselves in sooner rather than later. I dont know any profession that would pay for parental leave to look after an ill child so no I don't think your employer is being unreasonable by following this. However as a previous retail manager I would have found ways for you to make up some of your hours after your dc isolation period and/or authorised some annual leave if you had any owing to try and reduce the impact on your wages.
In regards to your outgoings could you apply for a payment break or reduced payments for this month?

Also couldn't agree more with PP who said people will not test anymore If they can get away with it to avoid this scenario

VaccineSticker · 01/09/2021 22:02

Some on here are criticising the op but don’t realise that there’s an extremely high chance they will be in the same position when school restarts.
You have my sympathy OP!
And for the one poster suggesting she leaves her positive child with the grandparents: have you been living under a rock for the last 18 months?!

cansu · 01/09/2021 22:02
  1. Tell them that you will phone around all your family members / friendly colleagues who work different days and ask if anyone can mind her. Check that they are happy for you to potentially infect the rest of the staff. (Of course no one will do this but this may make them think twice as they will not really want you to come in due to potential infection of other staff. They are just trying to get out of paying you.
  1. If they insist that you take unpaid leave, take an LFT everyday. If you test positive, you can then change to sick leave.
  1. Make sure that you take your sick leave in the future. You now know they will be unhelpful so if your dd is sick in the future, take sick leave yourself rather than be honest.
cansu · 01/09/2021 22:04

I also agree that this kind of situation will contribute to the further spread of this disease. No one will be willing to test anymore as they will be too fearful of the consequences of their child being kept at home and their inability to work. The govment are an utter shit show.

Wellbythebloodyhell · 01/09/2021 22:04

@IncessantNameChanger

I think situations like this are going to make some people reticent to test.

My employer would have been ok with WFH or making hours up over time. Pretty impossible if you work in retail or leisure. It's a impossible situation all round

Overtime isn't impossible in retail. You may find some team members who are happy to come on their day off to cover an employee with the agreement for them to return the favour the week after. This happened often in my shop, trust between the employees to carry out their promises to cover is imperative though.
Errno · 01/09/2021 22:05

It's sad that on a parenting forum parents are not actually very supportive of other parents, especially working mums who always get the raw end of the deal when it comes to work and childcare.

Isn’t it? Sad

Ugzbugz · 01/09/2021 22:18

Can you say you now have symptoms to?

Wellbythebloodyhell · 01/09/2021 22:22

@cansu

1. Tell them that you will phone around all your family members / friendly colleagues who work different days and ask if anyone can mind her. Check that they are happy for you to potentially infect the rest of the staff. (Of course no one will do this but this may make them think twice as they will not really want you to come in due to potential infection of other staff. They are just trying to get out of paying you.
  1. If they insist that you take unpaid leave, take an LFT everyday. If you test positive, you can then change to sick leave.
  1. Make sure that you take your sick leave in the future. You now know they will be unhelpful so if your dd is sick in the future, take sick leave yourself rather than be honest.
  • Her employer isn't telling her to come just that time off will be unpaid same as it would be for most of the population.
    1. Her sick leave would start on the day she advised them she was also sick it wouldn't date back to the start of parental leave. Eg if OP tests positive on day 7 she's already had 7 days unpaid parental leave, she's in retail so I'll assume the first 3 days of sickness would also be unpaid also then if she's lucky to get full pay for the remainder if not SSP.
    1. Most employers monitor sickness and be very strict about it, its a risky option claiming her own sickness every time her dc gets ill to avoid taking unpaid leave as it could potentially end up in disciplinary action especially if they go down the route of wanting proof of illness (ie a positive PCR result or a sick note)
    EatSprayGlove · 01/09/2021 22:26

    It's really hard isn't it. Do you have any annual leave you can use for part of it? I don't think there's an easy answer, it's like when kids get bad chicken pox or break an ankle so I don't think there can be exceptions for positive children.

    teraculum29 · 01/09/2021 22:32

    OP, if you are a recipient of UC or tax credit etc. you can claim £500 from your council.