People have become mean-spirited during this

[Gyutre]

From the NHS clapping enforcers to the local FB groups curtain twitching, to the truly appalling posts on this website, I really feel this has brought out a nastiness and lack of empathy in people.
It has seemed at times that to even express missinh pubs, friends, holidays etc is to open yourself up to accusations of frivolousness and selfishness. I have turned inside myself and become seriously unwell with depression. But it is all people singing songs and baking bread and lighting candles and meaningless epithets about how "this too shall pass".

I get that the local healthcare worker's FB posts wound you up but maybe that was their release after having another day of seeing people saying goodbye via Zoom. Hard to know the truth or motivation with just FB posts there are usually at least two sides to every story.

Now things are opening up try and not give up on your community there will be lovely people, who have been utterly lost during lockdown ready to embrace life again. Might just take a bit of time.

mean spirited? interesting....most of what i've seen (working full time all the way through this shitshow in essential retail management) is bloody selfishness

[quote NameChangeChronicPain]The deification drives me (an NHS worker) and DH (another NHS worker) up the wall tbh. It's so unnecessary. There are plenty of other people working themselves to the bone during the pandemic without anywhere near the kind of income, social gravitas, or respect that we get.

The whole 'NHS discount' thing was appalling too. Sure, give a discount to the people who have kept their jobs, instead of to the many people who've lost theirs or are struggling financially. We don't need 10% off at a supermarket or a free coffee FFS. Morrisons still do it so we get the 10% off and then spend that amount on a food bank parcel (they have them packaged up at the door when you go in which is handy!).

We're not heroes, we're just ordinary people doing the job we trained to do.

It's okay to feel angry btw. It'd be kinda weird if you weren't angry at at least something after the awful year we've all had. And I'm sorry you're going through depression, that's really, really tough. I hope tomorrow is a better day for you

oh, and abuse....yes,the incidents of abuse have rocketed....never seen so much of the police in my life!

shoplifting
verbal abuse
physical abuse
emotional abuse....deliberatley sneezing/coughing actions
covid law breaking

its been hideous

[quote NameChangeChronicPain]The deification drives me (an NHS worker) and DH (another NHS worker) up the wall tbh. It's so unnecessary. There are plenty of other people working themselves to the bone during the pandemic without anywhere near the kind of income, social gravitas, or respect that we get.

The whole 'NHS discount' thing was appalling too. Sure, give a discount to the people who have kept their jobs, instead of to the many people who've lost theirs or are struggling financially. We don't need 10% off at a supermarket or a free coffee FFS. Morrisons still do it so we get the 10% off and then spend that amount on a food bank parcel (they have them packaged up at the door when you go in which is handy!).

We're not heroes, we're just ordinary people doing the job we trained to do.

It's okay to feel angry btw. It'd be kinda weird if you weren't angry at at least something after the awful year we've all had. And I'm sorry you're going through depression, that's really, really tough. I hope tomorrow is a better day for you

@applesandoranges221

It’s fundamentally classism I think - middle class people who have secure jobs that haven’t been affected, nice houses with gardens etc have locked themselves away with their “famalam” and baked banana bread, and seem incapable of understanding that there is a large chunk of society without those privileges, hence a complete lack of empathy for anyone who struggles!

I’m privileged enough to be in the position of a secure job, owning my own home, living in a nice area but also to have experienced the devastation of living alone during this. More empathy all round would have gone a long way.

Do you even know how important being able to bake banana bread has been for families? It's low to toss that around as an insult.

What nordica and MoreTime said.

I completely agree with you OP. I’ve seen and experienced so much sanctimonious busybody-ing nastiness over masks and lockdown “rules” (“” used because people are so often wrong about the rules when spouting about how selfish you are and how many grannies you’ve killed) that I feel like I have changed as a person. I used to think most people were inherently good. Now I assume they are arseholes and am surprised if this turns out not to be the case. I hope this is temporary and I will go back to how I was before, but I have a horrible feeling I won’t.

Mean spirited poster calls kettle black. Weird.

I was furloughed for the best part of a year .
I didn't clap the NHS
I followed the rules.
But i did not judge people for doing what they needed to do to get through the pandemic.
If covid had happened during my childhood then the disease itself would of been the least of my problems.

I’ve seen some lovely community spirit and read posts where people have helped each other out and it was heartwarming to see people pulling together and helping neighbours. The sheer volunteer army astounded me.
Sadly I’ve also seen and read lots of selfish behaviour where people don’t think the rules apply to them and don’t have to be followed.

I'm mask exempt (I have trigeminal neuralgia). Some of the comments aimed at mask exempt people generally on here, and directed at me personally, have been vile. In 'real life' I've been called a disease breathed tramp, I've been spat at, I've been shouted at. On here, I've been called a selfish super spreader, a cunt, told I should not work or use public transport, that I should stay at home, that I'm responsible for people's deaths.

I can understand that people have been scared and fear makes people act out of character and maybe even aggressively. But given the relish with which people have reported neighbours for going out twice in the same day and told people they can't buy chocolate or whatever, I'm inclined to agree with you OP.

[quote NameChangeChronicPain]The deification drives me (an NHS worker) and DH (another NHS worker) up the wall tbh. It's so unnecessary. There are plenty of other people working themselves to the bone during the pandemic without anywhere near the kind of income, social gravitas, or respect that we get.

The whole 'NHS discount' thing was appalling too. Sure, give a discount to the people who have kept their jobs, instead of to the many people who've lost theirs or are struggling financially. We don't need 10% off at a supermarket or a free coffee FFS. Morrisons still do it so we get the 10% off and then spend that amount on a food bank parcel (they have them packaged up at the door when you go in which is handy!).

We're not heroes, we're just ordinary people doing the job we trained to do.

It's okay to feel angry btw. It'd be kinda weird if you weren't angry at at least something after the awful year we've all had. And I'm sorry you're going through depression, that's really, really tough. I hope tomorrow is a better day for you

We're not heroes, we're just ordinary people doing the job we trained to do.

Absolutely this.

@TheVampiresWife

I'm mask exempt (I have trigeminal neuralgia). Some of the comments aimed at mask exempt people generally on here, and directed at me personally, have been vile. In 'real life' I've been called a disease breathed tramp, I've been spat at, I've been shouted at. On here, I've been called a selfish super spreader, a cunt, told I should not work or use public transport, that I should stay at home, that I'm responsible for people's deaths.

I can understand that people have been scared and fear makes people act out of character and maybe even aggressively. But given the relish with which people have reported neighbours for going out twice in the same day and told people they can't buy chocolate or whatever, I'm inclined to agree with you OP.

I'm so sorry you've had that shit thrown at you :(

Some of the posts in the last year have been breathtaking in their nastiness, even by MN standards.

@applesandoranges221

It’s fundamentally classism I think - middle class people who have secure jobs that haven’t been affected, nice houses with gardens etc have locked themselves away with their “famalam” and baked banana bread, and seem incapable of understanding that there is a large chunk of society without those privileges, hence a complete lack of empathy for anyone who struggles!

I’m privileged enough to be in the position of a secure job, owning my own home, living in a nice area but also to have experienced the devastation of living alone during this. More empathy all round would have gone a long way.

This with bells on ^

Most people have simply run out of steam and haven't the energy for any of this anymore. They can't support other people because they are struggling themselves. I don't think people are nasty at all, not in my experience, just not strong enough after so long to shoulder anymore emotional pain. I hope you are getting support with your depression, remember that everything will seem different through the lens of MH op. It could be the way you are feeling

I agree OP. I went to work all through the pandemic, initially with very little protection. I helped relatives who were shielding. Have decided not to have the vaccine (for reasons that I am not prepared to discuss with strangers on here) so apparently I am selfish, pathetic and need to grow up. Funny a year ago, those same posters were probably on their doorsteps clapping for me and my colleagues

I agree too, OP. I also found that FB groups were the worst. I was in a huge one for my town... it started with people doing shopping for shielders etc, then quickly descended into finger pointing at minor things. When masks came in, it got even worse. I got kicked out... for the crime of saying I was struggling with my mental health. I got told I was being negative and dragging the group down. The piss take was, a few days after I got blocked, they posted a mental health check in thing... offering members to talk to them.
The overwhelming feeling I got from groups like that (and some posts here too) is that lockdown was a chance to take a step back from life, get out the fast lane etc.. when the people that were cheering the most about making their own bread, doing crafts with their kids, had no thought whatsoever for people suddenly stuck with an abusive partner, or people who saw their businesses just fold beneath them.

@BonnieDundee @XenoBitch @TheVampiresWife

@applesandoranges221 @BogRollBOGOF Completely agree.

@XenoBitch our town fb group is like that. Its also the same one where i got the weird PMs from that bloke policing what i was doing over Christmas

@TheVampiresWife

I'm mask exempt (I have trigeminal neuralgia). Some of the comments aimed at mask exempt people generally on here, and directed at me personally, have been vile. In 'real life' I've been called a disease breathed tramp, I've been spat at, I've been shouted at. On here, I've been called a selfish super spreader, a cunt, told I should not work or use public transport, that I should stay at home, that I'm responsible for people's deaths.

I can understand that people have been scared and fear makes people act out of character and maybe even aggressively. But given the relish with which people have reported neighbours for going out twice in the same day and told people they can't buy chocolate or whatever, I'm inclined to agree with you OP.

It takes some bottle to have gone out without masks for the last year. You're braver than I am. I wouldn't have been able to do it.

Thank you @MercyBooth

That bloke who messaged you at Christmas was just weird. What on earth was he thinking! Unfortunately some people see themselves as being entitled to police others but this has been engineered by the government. Such people probably think they are doing good

@TheVampiresWife

I'm mask exempt (I have trigeminal neuralgia). Some of the comments aimed at mask exempt people generally on here, and directed at me personally, have been vile. In 'real life' I've been called a disease breathed tramp, I've been spat at, I've been shouted at. On here, I've been called a selfish super spreader, a cunt, told I should not work or use public transport, that I should stay at home, that I'm responsible for people's deaths.

I can understand that people have been scared and fear makes people act out of character and maybe even aggressively. But given the relish with which people have reported neighbours for going out twice in the same day and told people they can't buy chocolate or whatever, I'm inclined to agree with you OP.

I am so sorry that you have experienced that. Some people really are utter twats.

I can honestly say that I barely notice or even care whether those around me in shops or the supermarket are wearing masks or not.

I can't wait to ditch masks. They are all too often being used as a stick to beat people with.