What to do when the dc can't social distance?

[elliejjtiny]

I've got 3 dc who can social distance, 1 who is autistic and has frequent meltdowns during which he can't social distance (but he can the rest of the time) and another who is also autistic and can't social distance at all. He also licks everything. One of my dc who can social distance has some health issues and is CV. He is too young to have the jab at the moment. He has also had to miss important medical appointments because of his bubble at school bursting and the whole class having to isolate. My other dc have had to self isolate due to cases at school too. Cases at my younger dc primary school are higher than they were before Christmas and 3 year groups have had to self isolate since the schools went back on 8th March. All the dc struggle with isolation and home learning. 3 of them can't cope with unexpected changes to routine. Dh and I are both CV and have had our first jabs.

At the moment we are only going out to completely deserted places which are few and far between. Activities have started opening up again. The dc's sports club has started up and there has been a free playscheme for the primary aged children locally which has been really popular. I really want to take the dc out to places where other people are and let them go to their sports club etc. I'm worried about them putting themselves and others at risk because 2 of them won't be able to social distance. I am also close to breaking point with all the isolating, home learning and missed appointments. I don't feel there is an end date to all this and every time I look on social media I see other people's dc doing things that I don't feel that I can do with my dc until social distancing is over.

My family keep telling me that it would be completely irresponsible to take the dc to anywhere with other people but it doesn't seem fair to my dc to not let them go anywhere fun when everyone else seems to be doing it.

What ages are your children?

Just take them.

If your other child isn't ECV, just CV, you're not doing amnything more risky than others whose kids are at school.

Mine certainly aren't socially distancing at school, parks, anywhere really, and that's the norm.

Cases are falling through the floor, the NHS is fine, the most likely to die have been vaccinated.

We just have to accept this virus, just as we accept flu, chicken pox, etc.

My youngest two kids are 2 and 4. The 4 year old understands to go into single file and give people space on pavements but that is about it... Kids don't get it. I am totally tolerant of other people's kids not getting in and generally they are tikerant of mine in return. Where I live there seems to be in unspoken principle that you obviously can't hold small children and/or those with additional requirements to these same standards. And that is quite correct in my view.

My 10 year old does understand and is v good in shops and on pavements. But if he is playing football then there is hugging and high-fives etc when a goal is scored. That's fine by me. I don't want my kids growing up fearing human contact.

In Scotland under 12s dont need to socially distance. What ages are your children?

Nothing. Do nothing. These kids will have mental health problems if we keep pushing them to do what is totally unnatural!!

People are rarely expecting children to social distance.when out and about.

My oldest (10) has ASD, tends to mask fairly effectively and is generally reticent about other people. In somewhere like a shop or on a path I've got him to step in, not dissimilar to normal, but somewhere like a playground, I've let him play naturally. His physical and social development are important too and I didn't want him to have to unlearn additional social anxiety.

The risks of outdoor transmission are very, very low. After a few weeks the first round of the vaccine offer good protection. Most areas have very low rates of virus now- you can check your local and wider area on the government's dashboard coronavirus.data.gov.uk/details/interactive-map

Unless you are in one of the few hotspots of community transmission (and the worst hotspots tend to be associated with institutions like prisons, or work places such as assembly lines) and you are of particularly clinically vulnerable, then the benefits of getting out with the children override the risks. The chances of a sensory child picking up the virus by contact with something like play equipment is very, very low. The virus degrades quickly, and the chances of an infected child making significiant contact with it moments before is near non-existant.

Organised groups with clean equipment between users.

What everyone else said. I don’t think people are expecting children to social distance. This has gone on too long now and their mental and physical health is far more important. They have sacrificed enough. I, for one am not constantly telling my kids and their friends to move 2m apart and I don’t know anyone else who is either.

Do you think kids are 2m apart whilst playing football at a club? No. But it’s allowed and fine because finally the government have accepted kids need group outdoor sports.
Let your kids go to the clubs. It will be good for them.

It’s hard, other parents at the activities may only be allowing their children to go as they feel the safety measures will be enforced. I wouldn’t be happy if the guidelines were being broken as not everyone has been vaccinated and children aren’t going to be for some time I would imagine.

Outdoors things? Just do it. The risk is minimal and from what I’ve seen hardly anyone bothers with 2m.

I’m certainly not bothered about kids getting too close and I’m really risk averse.

My kids are primary and social distancing in school has been zero since they went back. They are in class bubbles but that's it. They are playing normally in playgrounds etc.

Unless ECV and not CV I'd be carrying on as normal.

They don't SD at school.

Or at parks etc.

So I wouldn't worry too much.

What sort of places are you thinking of going to? If it's just outdoor country parks etc it'll be fine. And actually you just walk as a family so I don't see it'll matter?

The only thing I'd be concerned about and would avoid these situations is if you went to the beach or a picnic for example and they'll run up and be close to people who are sat on their blankets.

Everywhere I've been (my ds also has asd) there's been adults sat SD from other groups around the edge and kids are just running around and playing freely.

Yesterday I saw the local fair packed full of kids on trampolines and slides etc - it was lovely to watch!

Most people wouldn't expect all children to social distance in places and at activities that are meant for children. If people were that worried about lack of social distancing they would keep their children away.

Just go for it. My kids have been playing with other kids in the park for ages. I can't / wouldn't stop them - theyre little kids.

Thankyou everyone. Eldest dc is 14, youngest (and the one who can't social distance at all) is 6. The dc who can social distance most of the time but has meltdowns where he loses control is 12, nearly 13. My youngest would hug random strangers if we let him and would have to be on reins if we went out anywhere where there were people around.

The sports club has had some sessions outside and some inside during the easter holidays. The poster with the times and dates on said "social distancing in place" and "please line up at the door 2m apart" which I assumed meant that the children would have to social distance. There have also been people moaning on the local facebook pages about how people should be making sure their dc are socially distancing and moaning about how children/teens are hanging around in groups.

I will talk to the organisers of the sports club and find out exactly what is expected of the dc with social distancing.

Derailing slightly but are people really still moving over on pavements to pass strangers at a distance?