How am I the bad guy?

[mrsb06]

Does anyone else feel like they're made out to be some sort of idiot or weirdo for still following restrictions? How is it fair that I'm the bad guy for being the only one in my circle trying to do the right thing?

For what it's worth, I'd like to think I'm relatively easy-going, but when something is made law, I'll abide by it. What other people choose to do is none of my business but I want to do all that I can to protect my family.

I also lost someone close to me due to COVID and so maybe I'm over-sensitive about it. Feel like shunning restrictions is a bit like sticking a middle finger up at them and this hideous virus that took their life.

DP did something today that is against restrictions and when I brought it up got really funny about it, as if I just need to chill out and use my common sense.

Seems like the Easter weekend in combination with the knowledge that restrictions or being eased has been a free ticket for loads of people around me to have a free-for-all...mixing in larger groups, walking into people's houses, family groups having outings to the supermarket.

Still following restrictions here (in Wales) as are everyone i know!
Theres a lot of elderly that still haven't had their 2nd jabs, and no point in buggering up 3 months of lockdown..
Your DP is being an idiot.

Well what did he do?

Easter has been the mental cut off point for many people. Cases and deaths are low. Vaccinations are going well. Most people are making their own risk assessment whether you like it or not. The tide is turning.

Many people are starting to see people indoors. You can shout ‘selfish’ as much as you like. But many, young people especially have given up enough. This shouldn’t be a surprise. It’s a surprise people have complied for as long as they have. And have blindly accepted many ‘rules’ that have made zero sense.

I think compliance will be very low in the next few weeks to be honest. As we work towards some arbitrary date the government has decided we can finally see family indoors.

I broke the rules yesterday. Basically you know compliance is over if I break the rules. I practically didn't sleep the night before but now, I am so glad I did it. It was wonderful.

But what if these people making their "own risk assessments" fail to recognise that the choices that they are making impact others, thus taking away any choice that they have?

For example, what if they wander into your house before you've even had chance to say anything or bring people from other households to your garden when the law says only 2?

It's not as easy as it seems!

as if I just need to chill out and use my common sense

Yeah you pretty much do
What did he actually do?

If people are wandering in to your house and garden and you don’t want then to then just tell them!

Yes we as a family are sticking to the rules. If everyone had/did think we would have had freedom much sooner.

I don’t judge others for following the rules but I’m sick of following them-
I’m very sorry for your loss and yes maybe it does hit closer to home, but I have lost enough people to non covid illnesses to not expect life for the majority to halt because of them.

@Delatron It was this that happened. I know that you say this but in real life it's bloody awkward and not an easy thing to do, especially when you do get on with the people in question. I was in another part of the house and they were already in and sat down before I came back, I didn't answer the door.

Because following rules for rules sake makes you a mindless idiot, as a rule. Why does everyone expect some sort of medal for "following the rules". That's not necessarily a positive trait... the French were just "following the rules" when they handed Jews to the Nazis.

Ok well yes that’s tricky. Had you had a conversation with your DH before?

We had a similar situation. In laws due round today to sit in the garden. I told him snow was forecast and should we postpone. He said ‘oh well they can just come inside’ I was a bit pissed off, mainly as I’ve been making friends sit in the garden and my parents can’t come and stay. Didn’t want to break the rules for the bloody Im laws!

Plus his Dad has barely left the house in months. But they’ve been vaccinated and cases are negligible around here. So I left it for them to decide. And they came in. So because of that I’m kind of done making my friends sit in the garden..

I think everyone is making their own risk assessments and whether they want to follow the rules to the bitter end when most people have given up!

@rolloverrosie no where have I said I expect any kind of medal for following rules.

I find it difficult to be made out to be in the wrong for trying to do what is right.

[quote mrsb06]@rolloverrosie no where have I said I expect any kind of medal for following rules.

I find it difficult to be made out to be in the wrong for trying to do what is right. [/quote]
Well perhaps people who are "breaking the rules" think they're just doing what is right too. For their mental health, or their child's. For the future of democracy. Etc.

@rolloverrosie Doing what is right for them, yes, but it's the short-sightedness of it all that annoys me.

If someone walks into my house because they've decided that they've had enough and they want to get out and about for whatever reason, what about what I've decided? Them walking into my house effectively takes away any choice that I have in the matter.

How did it happen though? You’ve implied your DH invited them in. I can see how easily this could happen. If you feel that strongly about it did you chat with your DH? Did he know how you felt?
I’m not sure I would blame the guests if they were invited in..

and maybe some people who are 'breaking the rules' are doing so because they don't give a stuff about possible consequences rolloverrosie.. i know, lets forget the last year, open all the borders etc etc because you think anyone following the guidelines is a mindless idiot aye?

Why dont you lock your doors? Then nobody can just walk into your house ? Why are people randomly walking into your house anyway

[quote mrsb06]@rolloverrosie Doing what is right for them, yes, but it's the short-sightedness of it all that annoys me.

If someone walks into my house because they've decided that they've had enough and they want to get out and about for whatever reason, what about what I've decided? Them walking into my house effectively takes away any choice that I have in the matter.

[/quote]
Short sighted if you buy into the rubbish that not seeing your loved ones makes any significant difference in the long run

Nobody has ever walked into my house uninvited... lock the door?

I don’t know. I lost a family member to covid after not seeing them for almost a year. What was the point? Her last year was miserable with no family, no one she knew around her, and she caught it anyway (in a care home) and died without us seeing her. Rules are rules, but I can understand people feeling like life is too short and actually wanting to see loved ones.

@audweb

I don’t know. I lost a family member to covid after not seeing them for almost a year. What was the point? Her last year was miserable with no family, no one she knew around her, and she caught it anyway (in a care home) and died without us seeing her. Rules are rules, but I can understand people feeling like life is too short and actually wanting to see loved ones.

Exactly this. People over 80 have a 1 in 6 chance of dying anyway in any given year. How many people have been robbed of the chance to see a loved one for the last time. FOR A YEAR. When it was "3 weeks to flatten the curve" that was on thing but were talking 54/55 weeks now. That's a hell of a long time. For the very old and the very young.

OP, I hear you.

Incident at work a couple of weeks ago (a number of us were close contacts with someone who later tested positive) and work are behaving like I am a nutcase, though I'm certain I was in the right. The whole thing is so divisive - fortunately most people I know are being sensible.

Surely there's making your own risk assessment and then out and out breaking the rules (rightly or wrongly).

• Visiting a friend in their garden the day before allowed becuase realistically will that make a difference is making your own risk assessment.

• Having a threesome with your neighbour and his wife is (probably) a bad idea in light of Covid restrictions.

I'm not a fan of prolonged lockdowns either and of course the restrictions are hardest for society's most vulnerable but I plan to continue being sensible and I am eager to get vaccinated before it becomes a free for all.

to those who have lost loved ones. The care home deaths have been particularly cruel.