Feel quite low today- is it guilt?

[Woodlandbelle]

I am a mum and also working from home. While dh works long hours. My own situation is fine but my dm is quite negative and critical. My work, albeit from home, can be draining / emotional.
Here is the problem. Dh parents are elderly and live rurally. Mil never built a life for herself and doesn't drive. Fil is quiet the 'man of the house' and everything is on his terms. But they are solid and good people. The thing is dh rings everyday brings mil to appointments etc. There are two other siblings both ring daily. She has minor health issues and so on. Rolls her eyes at anything she doesn't agree with (women having a life basically)

I let dh deal with things but I felt when I spoke to mil lately that she was distant with me. I know I should visit and ring - but I can't deal with it all and don't feel I need to.
SIL - through marriage visits daily as a neighbour but I just feel its not my role. Am I selfish? I probably am.

I meant to add the reason this is in this topic is mil expects us to visit all the time even when she had covid she got mad with dh and says she is mad with me when I don't visit with him. I will try to make more of an effort

Your mil is your DH's family. It is his responsibility to keep in touch if he wants to. Its not your responsibility. Don't feel guilty!

I think its just ingrained in me the guilt. But she has her own family and they all contact her so much also fil alive and well. Its sad as she hasn't her own hobbies and interests. All conversation is around religion and local news. I don't have a lot in common but am always polite and I do respect them very much. Though I don't agree with their views I don't say anything of course. But it got to the point last year If dh hasn't called by 5pm she would ring me panicing where was he. Did he have an accident. Then wants to go to the doctor and even A&E for very minor things like constipation. It's very sad. I could very much become the go to person for dealing with it all. So I backed off but probably backed off too much.

Thank You for your response it means a lot.