Just that really, could use a handhold.
Covid hasn't been terrible for us. Nobody we know has died or anything and a lot of people have had it and recovered fine which is a relief.
But financially it's been chaos. DP has been on furlough since March and likely facing redundancy next month. He's gone from a happy easy going guy to quiet and withdrawn. He loves his job and is really struggling being out of work. He's volunteering locally which gives him some purpose but it's not many hours a week and I think he feels a bit useless. I also lost all my work in Lockdown 1, I was freelance and I watched my workload evaporate overnight. I'll never forget watching Matt Hancock give a press conference saying no help for self employed people like me. It was terrifying. But I fought tooth and nail to find work and managed to get some temp stuff over the summer which kept a roof over our heads. I've now got something permanent which I'm very glad about.
My mum has really struggled. Her anxiety has gone through the roof and she won't leave the house. We've only seen her once in the last year when we sat in her garden for a couple of hours last summer. My best friend is in a bad way too and now having to be medicated for MH issues. I miss my lovely sunny mate and it breaks my heart a bit everytime I speak to her. I don't really know how to help either of them and it worries me all the time.
I hate my job and it's really hard to do from home but the office is closed and unlikely to open for many months.
I feel constantly hemmed in and claustrophobic in our tiny house and it takes greater and greater willpower not to pop round to have a cuppa with a friend. I know I can't go in her house but I really really just want to throw caution to the wind and give up for a few hours!
I just feel broken. I really miss the old world, my job, my mates, my happy DH.
I stupidly thought the vaccine would give us a way out and even that now seems unlikely.
Just want to pull the duvet over my head and give up 