DS12 tested positive - home logistics??

[FrankSpencersBeret]

DS12 was saying he was tired and achy on Sunday, a bit of a sore throat and looked a bit pale. No temp, cough. We are on the east coast of US and due a huge snowstorm on Monday so I decided to take him for a covid test on Sunday evening in case he got worse and we were snowed in.

We were informed yesterday that he's tested positive and it's utterly thrown me. He goes to school but they are at 50% capacity, wear masks, desks 6ft apart, teachers have masks etc

Anyway, my question is for those of you with children who have tested positive - how did you manage indoors? And if you had a child test positive, what happened to the rest of the family. My dh and I are going to get tested this morning and obviously will be quarantining. But how 'separate' did you try and stay? It was awful last night as DS has been fine during the days but the last two nights has had trouble sleeping and he's been sobbing his heart out. He's a 'young' 12 and not overly independent. I'm just wondering if it's inevitable that my dh and I will get it, if we haven't done so already.

Our DD tested positive and DS was displaying the same symptoms as her so they both stayed in their rooms all the time. I took their meals in on trays and told them to think of it as room service rather than confinement.

DH and I made sure we wore masks and washed our hands after we had been in to see them and neither of us caught Covid. Before DD tested positive i'd laid in bed next to her because she was feeling unwell and given her hugs. She didn't have any of the 3 main symptoms, I just thought she'd picked up some germs from the kids she looked after at nursery.

I don't think it's inevitable if you take precautions but it's hard to watch your child suffer and not console them. I really hope your DS is feeling better soon.

Thank you.

I'm loving the room service idea. I think he will love that. We are thinking of letting him watch tv in his room as 'special rules' just to get through.

To be honest, you are probably already infected, as contagious from before the symptoms developing. (And assuming when he was first ill you weren't distancing and offering comfort.) But reducing your viral load probably still possible. I would just practise good hygiene, keep spaces well ventilated, and limit contact (but not at his emotional expense.)

I think it’s really cruel to isolate a child alone in their room regardless of whether you describe it as room service. Getting covid could well be scary for a child as their whole lives have been turned upside down by it already and then to be locked away and given the strong impression that they shouldn’t be asking for any comfort from their parents is appalling.

Did I say that I hadn’t gone into him? Locked away?? How did you handle it when in this position?

I’m asking for ways to make it manageable and to keep us all as safe as possible. We quite probably are infected anyway. Seeing as there are only the three of us here, all family back in the UK, it’s my huge fear what will happen to ds if both my husband and I get sick.

My ds loves a hotel room. So would enjoy a bit of room service.

I’m in a similar position OP, don’t have a positive result yet but I am vulnerable and haven’t been able to distance from DS (8) because he needs comfort. I feel your conflict. Only thing you can do is take the known precautions, try to be mum to him first and worry about the rest of you second.

Slightly different but I had covid over Xmas and it never even occurred to me to lock myself away. I wasn’t really that unwell ( just loss of taste and smell). I cooked Xmas dinner and interacted with the family as normal. Slept in the same bed as dh. We all did the 10 day isolation together playing board games, watching tv and normal family stuff. Dh and dc’s never caught it or at least not as far as we know.

cassgate It's so bizarre isn't it how random it seems to be. That's great that no-one else became sick.

My dh and I both got negative rapid test results this morning and our pcr results will take 2/3 days. We seem to be finding 'our space' a bit more this afternoon while still interacting. There are so few situations I can think of where 'being mum first' makes me worry for my own health, and that's why last night felt so awful. As I was comforting my son, I must admit that half my brain was focused on how to do that sensibly.

Chailatteplease I hope your ds feels better soon. Your advice is very wise, thank you.

Understandable to want to be cautious as you are abroad with no family locally, although possibly you have already been thoroughly exposed. Obviously if he needs you you'll have to be in with your ds, but if he's OK with the room service, tv watching and so on and you working on the ventilation and wearing masks then I would do what you can to keep your exposure down a bit. Personally I'd go for the best mask set up I could (do you have some N95s?) so that I could have a bit more contact that way.

I'd let my child use any room of the house and I would not distance from any of them.
I wouldn't want my children to feel scared or in need of hugs and comfort. If that means risking myself so be it

Im notnsure you can rely on your test results... we are told over here it can take 10 days to show, so a negative early on could just be "incubating " and turn positive by the end of 10 days after contact (hense isolation even for 10 days regardless of testing.)

We didnt bother living separately as it wouldn't have worked for our family. Only 1 had symptoms hough bixarrely.

Ventilate the house so windows open, clean the bathroom after he’s been in there. If he’ll enjoy the hotel room treatment then put a TV in his room, get him to text for snacks etc but obviously when he’s lonely don’t condone him. I was the only one in our house of 4 who got it, one of my DC climbs in my bed every night, DH still slept next to me and I didn’t stay in my room because of youngish DC. What we did do was me sit on a different sofa, keep at least 1metre away when possible and keep windows open even in November.

@LivingInMySlippers

I'd let my child use any room of the house and I would not distance from any of them. I wouldn't want my children to feel scared or in need of hugs and comfort. If that means risking myself so be it

I think what you might be missing is the OP's concern that, if she and her dh both get ill at once and are get it badly, then that could be worse for her ds than them being careful now, because of having no local family and being out of the UK. Hugs now vs hugs later, if you like.

At the same time I would try not to worry too much OP as probably it's mostly out of your hands anyway due to you already being exposed, and also the chances of both you and your dh being completely bedbound or worse at the same time are hopefully not that high.

Another thing you could try is seeing if mainly one parent could do most of the interacting with the other (perhaps the one least exposed already) staying a little bit more distant?

Thank you all for your advice as it's calmed me down a bit, reminded me of the basics and of what I can/can't control. I agree that the negative results today don't really count for much but we had contact with friends on Saturday so really did it for their benefit.

Tesseract is correct in that my fear stems from what will happen to ds if both my dh and I get very ill and potentially hospitalized at the same time. I know that people back home haven't seen their families for months in many cases but they know that in a true emergency they would be there if needed. We don't have that fall back or any friends here in a position to have ds. So 'home' feels a very long way away right now.