People saying ‘we’ve had a year of this’ - what did you do last summer?

[Bubbinsmakesthree]

I keep seeing people saying things like “my child hasn’t played with anyone else in a year” or “I’ve not seen any friends in a year”. I know some people have been shielding or live in areas that have had tougher restrictions for longer...but if not, what were you doing last summer?

I think I’ve been fairly cautious but we still managed holidays/trips away in the UK, lots of (socially distanced) meet ups with friends and family and my children saw lots of their friends. We’ve been to museums, meals out, swimming etc. Other than children not social distancing with each other I don’t we broke any rules. It certainly wasn’t a normal summer but in comparison with the current (really miserable) lockdown things were pretty decent.

Lots of people I know were regularly in bars, making cinema trips, foreign holidays and taking the children soft play (i drew the line well before it got to soft play myself!)

Are people forgetting what actually happened or did some people remain in voluntary lockdown all year?

We didn’t do any indoor activities during the summer, we’re still restricted to meeting with one other household or very small number. We limited our contacts so didn’t see lots of different people. It certainly wasn’t a normal summer.

[quote Mousehole10]@Bubbinsmakesthree my point was that if you had followed the rules (i.e. your kids had to social distance outside of school) like many others did, you too would’ve one of the ones saying this. As it was, you didn’t follow the rules but now don’t seem to understand why others didn’t have the summer you had.[/quote]
It’s a genuine question then - were we unusual in that we let children socialise a bit within their school bubbles? It seemed the norm in my area but it may not have been. In which case that would explain quite a bit of the variation in people’s experience.

As I said, I recognise we were in the minority in that we even had a class bubble before summer. The return to school had ‘normalised’ a certain amount of interaction by June.

Another Leicester person here. We had a brief period where we could see 6 people outdoors so we could go to the park with friends. But have never been able to mix on private property. Yes we had eat out to help but given you couldn’t mix indoors with anyone outside your household it was pointless for most people who wanted to see friends and family. Obviously people did and broke the guidelines but you did that too OP and no it wasn’t the norm.

We had a precovid booked holiday in the uk in July, my mum who is in out bubble camr and we had caravans next door to each other so made a massive garden area round the outside of them with wind breakers and filled up a paddling pool, we didnt do daytrips or use any facilities but after months of not seeing my mum and her working flat out as a care home manager we were happy to just in the sun and watch the children play in a different environment.

I met a friend and her kids at a country park for a picnic a couple of times so the kids could play and we could chat socially distanced and i met her on out own for a walk a few times. None of which was breaking any rules. We both have cv children so havent taken any risks and apart from those meetings neither families have seen anyone else.

Apart from my mum who is in our bubble i havent been in anyones house or garden or had anyone in mine and i havent been shopping or to a restaurant. I appreciate that a few areas havent had any lifting of restrictions but most areas had a brief chance to meet others within guidlines.

Last spring/summer was a dream compared to now IMO. The weather was fantastic, we were confident covid wouldn't last too long, we had bbq's and I dug a vegetable patch and planted all sorts of fruit. We went abroad in the summer, kids went back to school in September and I thought it would all be over by Christmas. Now the weather is horrible, we can't go anywhere or do anything and have no idea when we will be able to, home schooling is going on and on, haven't seen my elderly parents who live the other side of the country for a year and it all seems like an endless nightmare.

In the summer it was 2 households of any size could meet, or a maximum of 6 from more than 2 households.

This was for us totally different to the rule of 6, because it meant that our family of 4 could meet with another family. Most of my friends have children, and the rule of 6 meant we couldn't see them, and it's not as if you can leave small children behind...

No, we didn't do anything at all in the summer bar visit people's gardens or have them visit ours.

DH is CEV and it seemed obvious that whilst it might have been allowed to be in some indoors spaces, it was still really dangerous. I was actually a bit flabbergasted by how much other people - even not in vulnerable groups - jumped to go and gather in restaurants (where they were definitely breaking the law as tables weren't big enough to sd from people outside your household) or cinemas.

I do wish everyone had been as cautious as us as it would definitely had made the second wave smaller. I actively judge anyone who went abroad, unless it were to visit an ill/elderly family member.

School bubbles were for just that, school. Not to be replicated outside of that for social reasons imo.

However, we weren’t familiar with school bubbles as our daughter was at home from March & didn’t return to school until September.

I was & still an cautious of the number or people we have contact with. The more people you see, the more the risk increases. It’s like a chain.

I personally think school “bubbles” get abused outside of the school environment.

I’m similar to you OP - last summer and autumn we let the children socialise with kids in their bubbles plus their cousins, had a couple of UK holidays, went swimming and to restaurants etc.

But what you and me would call pragmatic and sensible attempts at some form of normality is viewed by some as irresponsible and idiotic behaviour. People are entitled to their views but I’m completely comfortable with the decisions I’ve taken. I would do exactly the same again.

Well we didn't go on holiday because we thought the whole idea was irresponsible. We didn't eat out or go to pubs because the eat out scheme seemed utterly ludicrous given the circumstances. We only spent time with close family, and the odd friend in an outside space. Lots of people continued to use their common sense last summer and chose not to do things that may spread the virus- particularly given many of us wanted schools back open so spending the summer spreading Covid around the place seemed counter productive.

We all make our own choices based on our own circumstances and it is very true to say that many of us have chosen to take less risks of catching/spreading the virus and have been in a state of semi lockdown for almost a year now.

@Bubbinsmakesthree I think letting the "school bubbles" socialise outside of school was outside the norm (and against the rules) yes, but we were in the group who had no school at all March - September last year so no school bubbles existed.

DD had several WhatsApp calls per week with her friends which for a 6 yr old wasn't much of a substitute really.

I suppose if depended on whether they could get time/money together when restrictions were lifted. We did manage a couple of holidays when restrictions were lifted, albeit the uk, and a couple of museum trips. Nothing like the amount we would normally do though. Our boys have been missing having friends for sleepovers, which they used to do a lot, as that's been over a year now.

No - we have done absolutely nothing in the way of socialising since last March - no pubs, no restaurants, no holidays, no trips out, no meeting up with any friends or family. I did manage to visit the hairdresser a few times during the summer/autumn but that's a distant memory now. I have just realised that the compulsory mask rule has now been in place for 6 MONTHS! Even the idea of going into a shop without one seems a whole lifetime ago now, and who remembers actually browsing with no real purpose?

I went to see my parents and my sister last summer, because I don’t live near them, and we are extremely close. So my kids did get to play with their cousins. I’m pleased they did, we haven’t seen them since.
Other than that, we didn’t do much at all. We live in a tourist hotspot. It was absolutely heaving and people weren’t social distancing at all. Lots of comments like “We’ve come on holiday to get away from the virus”, shops struggling to enforce maximum numbers of people in etc.

We didn’t go swimming, we didn’t go to any of the places we would normally. We did one outdoor thing which we booked when we saw it was raining that morning, because we knew no-one else would go. We did one National Trust thing where the grounds are huge and we know it well, so know the areas we can walk where most people won’t go. That was it. Even our local beaches were packed, with roads left almost impassable with people parking on them. I have a feeling there were issues with access for emergency services to one beach one day when it was needed, the parking was so awful.

My summer holiday was about as far from normal as it could have been.

Good for you.

I spent my summer working full time in a hospital. Just like the rest of the year. I also lost a step parent and have only seen my other elderly/CEV parents and siblings twice. I haven't socialised with any of my friends outside of work colleague friends. I went out for a meal once. I don't know anyone who went on multiple holidays/trips away, out for multiple meals, museums, swimming, socialising etc. I don't see how its so hard for you to grasp that some people have had very different experiences to you.

But what you and me would call pragmatic and sensible attempts at some form of normality is viewed by some as irresponsible and idiotic behaviour. People are entitled to their views but I’m completely comfortable with the decisions I’ve taken. I would do exactly the same again.

Not everyone had the option of this 'normality'.
I would have loved to have done all the things the OP did but we couldn't.
Greater Manchester police were fining people for having small family birthday parties in their gardens, pubs and restaurants were only allowing you to sit with your own household and hotels and attractions were cancelling bookings if you had an OL postcode.
It's been utterly shit.

OP our summer was same as yours. I've never made my dd social distance, adults have done it mostly, but i'm not gonna stop her, as she's only 3.

We saw lots of friends in houses under rule of 6, so takeaway at friends house each week, trips to the park etc. The 6 was annoying as could only see 1 other family at a time, but just meant we were out twice as much to see everyone.

We haven’t had anyone in our house other than essential maintenance like electrician since last March. We did meet friends outside last summer.
People were not allowed to travel freely abroad last summer. From the time the state school holiday started the government put quarantine on Spain. Our holiday to Europe was cancelled at the end of August as quarantine was brought in for France and dd would have missed start of term. I was only able to visit my mother between late July and October and ever since then lockdown and tiers have made it illegal. At Christmas we could not see anyone due to t4.

It is really unfair that people who live close to relatives have been able to see them throughout whilst the rest of us have been cut off from aging parents for most of the year. I am also cross that many people did not quarantine after holidays last year which means those of us who missed holidays abroad last year are now unlikely to be able to go abroad for a second year due to quarantine hotels etc.

@SueEllenMishke I probably should have put a disclaimer in - yes some people live in areas where what I did wasn’t permitted, and yes some people at severe risk needed to shield. My point was that some people who did have options to do more chose not to use them, which is absolutely fine, but is their choice!

@IvysPoison Irresponsible?ludicrous? This just sounds like sour grapes. People who ate out or went on holiday weren’t breaking the law. Oh and your medal is in the post.

We had about 4 weeks of lesser lockdown where i live. My 18 year son missed his birthday celebrations, as did my 40 year old sister. My dad was buried at the end of March and weve never been together as a family to mourn or remember him. I had Breast cancer in May and couldnt see my family or friends. My DS started his first year at uni in October and has yet to set foot on a campus, hes missed all the normal fun freshers stuff. My husband lost his job twice last year due to Covid and I was on long term sick due to cancer treatment so we had no money to do or plan anything nice.We were so looking forward to a small family meal over Christmas, then my mum and stepdaughter tested positive for Covid. All this has taken such a toll on my MH im now under a psychotherapist. Instead of being so bloody gloaty about the fact you have had a nice time OP how about watching the news? Or reading these posts? Or just engaging your brain for 10 seconds to maybe understand why you feel the need to sneer at people less fortunate than you?

It's not been a year yet I don't think? Dh and I have worked out of the home through lockdown and 2 DC were able to go back to school for a few weeks in the summer. Grandparents have done childcare as didn't exceed rule of 6 if dh and I were at work. Or my childminder was open. So kids have been able to see plenty of other people. I've met friends and family outside for tea/drinks or for walks throughout (although only one at a time currently). My older children do this with friends too. In the summer we went glamping for a week and a cottage for a week and went to various beaches most days. All outside and socially distanced. Lots of ice cream, a couple of meals out in August - had a lovely time. Back to school/ work/ extra curricular activities such as swimming in September. We normally have Christmas just us so that was normal although less extra Christmas stuff. So overall it's been manageable for our family. January was a bit rubbish though.

I stayed within 10 miles of my home. I met up with the same friends a couple of times outside & socially distanced. Ate out a couple of times & a couple of days out to nearby attractions. Anything I did meant staying outside!
I juggled dates so I could see my parents once a fortnight ie wait 2 weeks after a social event, see a parent, arrange a social event for the next night/day then wait two weeks, see a parent, etc. That was my priority.
It was very quiet - I was planning on going to France but the closer I got to the date, the more uncomfortable I felt, so I didn't go!

In the North West and we haven't done any of these things. Only had a few weeks without any restrictions. We have not been anywhere and hardly seen anyone for almost a year.

@Bubbinsmakesthree in my area, yes it would have been unusual. Not sure about other areas. You also had to socially distance whilst in others homes and in pubs/restaurants from people not in your household, which round here is pretty hard to do. So the answer to your op is that lots of people didn’t have the summer you had as they were actually following the rules. Of course those who didn’t follow them, like yourself, had a better summer.