Sudden terror

[OCDdeathanxiety]

Last night I was lying in bed suddenly utterly convinced something terrible would happen to my mum . Heart disease or something .

My aunt is in hospital atm, very nearly died a fortnight ago of covid, she was fine and then suddenly couldn’t breathe at all, and I’m not sure if that’s got me spiralling but I’m terrified .

My mum is reasonably fit and well although has lots of mental health stuff and doesn’t always eat or exercise well .

Ended up shaking last night as was so convinced of this terrible thing coming - so vivid in my mind - and now I’m desperately trying to think of ways I can make sure everything will be safe .

The TV constantly showing dying people in masks is frightening me too . Every ten minutes this afternoon .

I have got a diagnosis of OCD - health anxiety - but it’s been controlled for a few months and something’s obviously undone it a bit .

What can I do, GP hasn’t the time I don’t think - and mental health services have a two-three year wait between assessment and treatment . Don’t know if I should just try and block it and plough through but it comes back every night . Daytime I’m pretty much following my mum around the house (we live together) as so worked up .

Private therapist. I hope you get it sorted, anxiety is horrible. I suffer too.

Hi OP,
Have you told your doctor how distressing it is for you at this time, as in are they aware of the seriousness of the situation? Can you try and book another appointment and explain, maybe something else they can do.
If not- as pp said any way of a private therapist.
I must admit me and DH usually watch things on iPlayer, Netflix, Amazon etc so no adverts. But we fancied something on it player and I was shocked at repetition and intensity of adverts about Covid. Can you find it in you to cut out TV with adverts, as that may help you? Treat yourself to Netflix if you don't have it and are in a position to and move away from the ads.
I hope that you can be seen and it can improve.

In the short term have you ever been prescribed beta blockers?

Don’t dismiss your GP, they are hear for this kind of thing. Mine was brilliant when I had an anxiety related breakdown. Best to nip it in the bud as unlikely to go away without a strategy! 💐

They do know, but they won’t do appointments at all now - just tell you to fill out an online form and they’ll email advice back . Usually the advice back is just to contact the Samaritans . It’s very difficult to find anyone willing to talk and advise at the minute sadly .

I’m on mirtazapine and propranolol (60mg) which stops some of the physical feelings but the thoughts come at me constantly, and I get confused between what’s real sometimes and what’s anxiety . I was so utterly convinced last night that something terrible was on the cards, and couldn’t get rid of it . Even considered sitting outside my mums bedroom all night which can’t be a normal or rational thing to want to do .

Will definitely turn off the TV for a bit, it’s very distressing - I’m aware of covid but I don’t want to be thinking of it 24/7 .

I've felt very overwhelmed this week by covid. I have always felt very together but I completely broke down this week. Ive hidden a few friends on social media who constantly share covid related stuff, we don't watch live TV, but I've also started listening to Spotify rather than the radio. I have been coming on mumsnet less too, as all the happy cheery threads aren't here. I find myself getting upset when I'm reading so much doom and gloom wherever I turn.

Have you talked to your mum about your worries? Would something like a baby monitor make you feel better so you could hear that she's ok, obviously if she's OK with that.

I also have ocd and health anxiety and it's awful. I'm sorry you're going through this.

@Hotpinkangel19

I also have ocd and health anxiety and it's awful. I'm sorry you're going through this.

Me three ❤️

Have you tried using a meditation app eg headspace? There’s some powerful stuff in there for anxiety and panic and I find it really comforting and grounding. It’s my support bubble atm!