Toddler in lockdown 3.0

[HannahS99]

I’m really struggling with our toddler this time round. I feel like I’m imprisoning him in 2 rooms downstairs while I attempt to home school our two other children. He’s great at playing on his own, but let’s face it after months and months of being at home (we were tier 3 before lockdown) he is just bored of everything in the house.

The older two children 7 and 5, are increasingly reluctant to do any school work. Massive tantrums etc. I’m trying to get them to play board games or do Lego etc but the toddler ruins all their games. Anything that requires concentration like baking is pretty much out of the question. Last week I resorted to play doh and then iPad as a last resort but toddler wasn’t that keen.

All the things that kept us busy in the summer are gone, walking routes full of mud and inaccessible to pram. Playground has mostly been too icy to use, even all wrapped up it’s been too cold. Toddler will scream in the pram but if I let him walk he will be falling over on the ice etc.

I’m at the end of my tether with them all. My OH is a key worker working very long hours so I’m on my own. The final straw was nursery being closed due to Covid (he had only recently started going 1 day a week). I feel so sad at all the things he’s missing out on.

Obviously I love all of my kids but thinking about homeschooling etc again next week and I’m just filled with despair. Another week of everybody screaming and crying at me for hours on end. Even the simplest tasks seem so much harder at the minute. What on earth can I do?

Yes, I agree with pp above. Schools should close and admit they're not providing an education to their pupils. They shouldn't put the responsibility of schooling on parents.

Then we could have a sensible conversation about how to catch pupils up after months of missed schooling.

My nearly 3 yo DD is getting really clingy, and she used to be great at playing on her own but that has changed too. As a result I'm getting increasingly snappy which I hate myself for.

Fortunately playgroup restarted this week, but I have a constant feeling of dred that it will be closed again. My poor DD is an only child and getting no contact with children at a time in her development where she NEEDS to be socialising. She has started saying that she isn't allowed to play with other children when we go to the park (this has definitely not come from me or her dad), it's so very sad.

In my own ideal little world (yes I understand this wouldn’t be possible or practical for thousands of reasons) they would make February half term much longer, shaving a few wks off the summer holidays, when hopefully numbers will be greatly reduced.

@MessAllOver

Yes, I agree with pp above. Schools should close and admit they're not providing an education to their pupils. They shouldn't put the responsibility of schooling on parents.

Then we could have a sensible conversation about how to catch pupils up after months of missed schooling.

I absolutely agree with this, parents cannot be expected to carry the curriculum on from home while working/caring for younger siblings. I have no idea what/how to teach my year 1 and 5 and am more concerned about confusing the poor kids (not to mention the fact it descends into a shouting chaos every time). I emailed my MP to this effect....but no reply.

@HannahS99 I absolutely feel you. I have almost the same set up, 18 months, 4 and almost 7, the 4 year old isn't at school yet though and goes to nursery for 2 blissful days and I'll take that risk unless they close. The 18 month old never started nursery because of Covid.

I'm finding life hard at the moment, constantly feeling like a failure at everything and struggling to keep up. Our school do 2 15 minute zoom chat and then we're on our own. I've decided this time to lower the standard. My 6 year old can't do anything at all on her own, she gets distracted by her own pencil! So, I bought a cursive writing handbook and a pack of Nelson spelling workbooks for phonic which she can do with minimal supervision from me apart from all the nagging. She does a page of each in the morning and then we go out for a walk. When we get back we have lunch and I put the 18 month old to bed and do an hours maths with her (usually what the school have sent). It means that the 4 year old gets ignored, which I feel bad about. After that they have TV time and I start doing dinner etc.

It is relentless, never a moments peace or time to get anything done. I SO wish I could escape by going out to work and I've become obsessed with it. At weekends I tend to do the meal planning and food ordering and try and leave my husband to deal with them a fair bit because otherwise I'm going to go mad. I agree about wishing they would just say 'schools are closed and there is no education' because I can't do it all. I feel bad that my 6 year old isn't getting what a lot of her peers are getting at home or school, I feel bad that my 4 year old gets ignored a lot of the time and bad that my poor 18 month old has no friends or little experience of the world outside of our home. I'm too exhausted and overwhelmed to engage with them the way I should be and my relationship with my husband is really strained and has been for a while now too.

I think the only thing we can do is take one day at a time and get enough sleep. When we look back at this we'll think we were superhuman I'm sure.

Full sympathy, 18 months is a really hard age when you have older siblings. I find that if I manage to get my 2 outside the day tends to be better and feels shorter. I know weather is rubbish at the moment, but my kids seem to love mud.

I used a sling when mine was 18 months so they could scramble about since the buggy just caused frustration and my eldest wants to climb trees and 'explore'. The youngest is now a bit over 2 and can walk a bit better so it got a bit easier. But I still have to carry them home often and come back like the mud monster.

@Piccalino3 I completely feel your pain :(

Tomorrow is a new day. Failing that CBeebies and coffee will be my plan tomorrow. Good luck! Keep remembering it’s not forever

Hi all. Reading all your comments has really helped me today. I’m due a baby in a couple of weeks and have a 2.5 year old and life has just felt a bit bleak of late. It’s good to know that I’m not alone in what I’ve been feeling. I hope for all our sakes that things improve soon. Or that at least the weather does!!

It is bloody hard. I’ve got a key worker place for my working days this time round but I find it a challenge to do the home schooling with my eldest while my toddler is bombing around on my non-working days. Lockdown 1 I did the juggle with work and it was just awful. The challenge is the unpredictability of the little one and dealing with the tantrums/basic safety things while trying to get the home schooling one to concentrate. I only get things done during nap time really.

@Dustyhedge I honestly don’t know how you homeschoolers do it (and I’m a teacher). My little boy is 2.5 and I realised yesterday that soon his memory of his friends and relatives and all the fun stuff we used to do will fade and my baby that’s due in a few weeks won’t even know any different. Such a testing time for everyone.