Home schooling is taking me down

[Cantstopwontstopeating]

Hi,
I probably know this thread has been done a million times before so I apologise.
But myself and my 5 year old are literally going to come to blows, he will just not do his school work for longer than 20 mins.
I’ve had numerous emails off the school saying that all of his work needs completed every day by the allocated time and if it’s not I have to send him in as there is still places.

Don’t know what I want from posting this, I think I just needed a rant as the thought of another day of bickering with a 5 year old over fucking phonics is just about to send me over the edge!!!

It's tough. Would you feel comfortable sending him in?

My children don't seem to think I know anything and I resigned from home schooling twice last time (no school from March to Sept as they were not in year groups that were let back)

The school are offering you a place. Take it if you can!

Don’t try to do it for more than 15 minutes at a time. Chunk it down into small sessions with a run in the garden/around the house/ playtime/lunch/TV programme/Lego or whatever in between. It will take all day to get it all done, but might help with concentration and focus. He’s only five.

With 5 years old, 20 minutes seems plenty. Can you do 20 mins in the morning, 20 minutes in the afternoon, concentrating on maths and literacy?
If he gets hang of homeschooling, he may start to feel more positive and start to enjoy learning.

Reception or year 1. I only do 10 mins at at time for my reception child. 1:1 working is much more intense than working in a lesson. Even then we are taking today off as we are both tired and a bit overwhelmed.

I would also look at doing 20 minute bursts of learning. It's hard to focus for much longer than that even as a adult.

Mine is 8 and we do an more involved task, then have a break and do one of the more "fun" activities. Then break for lunch. After lunch repeat.

Short bursts are the way to go here.

Agree with short tasks with plenty breaks. A fun activity after each one , play a board game or watch an episode of his favourite cartoon. I feel your pain though I've got a 5yo and home learning has definitely lost its appeal with him. Im picking my battles and trying to concentrate on the basics but its very much dependant on his mood tbh some days we do more than others.
I've also had same arguments but I've found leaving it for a while then coming back to it later helps.
Id email school and tell them to fuck off tell them you'll send work over as and when it's done. They can't make you send him in school if you don't want him too.
Its bloody hard with the younger ones they have never learned this way, school and home are usually separate now theres very little distinction between the two its bound to confuse them.
Take it easy on yourselves, if it all gets done then great but don't make both of you unhappy trying to achieve it. Its better to have a happy mum and happy child and only part of the school work done. If you have a day when nothing gets done then so be it, its not the end of the world you just try again tomorrow.

Tell them that putting pressure on you doesn't help the situation at all. There's no need for them to create a confrontation working relationship with you.

I'd tell them that I will adapt the work to suit his interests. If they have sent him a very dry academic worksheet then I would try to link it to life at home.

So if it was naming shapes I would get him to take a photo of shapes around the house etc.

Thank you everyone for your replies, it’s good to know that I’m not alone in this!

He has completed his work for today thank god, it took a lot of bribing and tears!

I think from Monday I am going to follow all of your advice and just do short bursts through out the day.
I don’t actually feel like he’s learning stuff from me and that he’s just doing through the motions. But it’s friday, and we all made it so that’s the main thing xx

Blimey. He’s 5. Chill. Tell the school to back off. Unless there is a back story being offered a school place for no reason other than not doing phonics is odd.

Would you prefer he goes to school? If so take the place.

How is it odd? I emailed the school explaining that I was a wfh and his school work would be done late afternoons/weekends as I had no other childcare and that is when they asked me to take him in as it has apparently been set out by the government that school work must be completed in allocated time 🤷🏼‍♀️

@DownWhichOfLate

Blimey. He’s 5. Chill. Tell the school to back off. Unless there is a back story being offered a school place for no reason other than not doing phonics is odd.

This!!!

Reading, painting, very basic numbers.

I would try and do 10 minutes then have a good break, then another 10 minutes. Try and get a bit of exercise (Joe Wicks video or GoNoodle) and then do another few minutes when you can.
At school they would normally have a very short input from the teacher where she teaches the new concept, then a longer period when they try and do the work set, then a break, then the same again with a different topic. Most work is done in the morning and then the afternoon would be art, book work or similar.

As a Reception teacher, I wouldn’t be doing a ‘work’ activity for longer than twenty minutes with that age anyway!

I would have dropped DS on their doorstep before the ink was dry on their email. If they have spare places why wouldn't you snap one up?!

You don't even need to do their work, never mind in the 'allocated time'! You just need to ensure he's accessing a full time education of some description that suits you and him. So if he prefers to watch the letters and sounds phonics videos on youtube instead of the phonics lesson from school etc.

If he'll do the school work in 20 minute bursts could you do that as and when suits you both and hand it in when you're ready. I wouldn't expect full concentration from a 5 year old for longer than that anyway. Maybe ask for a call to ask them to work together more productively in a way that puts his education first rather than them making this stressful situation even harder than it has to be.

link to the law

@Cantstopwontstopeating

How is it odd? I emailed the school explaining that I was a wfh and his school work would be done late afternoons/weekends as I had no other childcare and that is when they asked me to take him in as it has apparently been set out by the government that school work must be completed in allocated time 🤷🏼‍♀️

Well that isn’t true re the government, which makes this all very odd.

Surely, you are not the only parent in the entire school that is also WFH and may not complete the work during the allocated session?

Our school have supplied a full timetable but went to great lengths to explain that all work was completely optional, and that it was there for those who want it (plus zooms, lives, uploading work and teacher chats/points allocation for good work etc) but they understand the pressure on parents so won’t be chasing anything. So what they have told you RE the government is either complete bullshit, or my school is in the wrong.

My top tip.

Write a basic timetable for the day. (A whiteboard is good for this though not necessary - a sharpie and a bit of paper work just as well).

I think if they can see what is coming, it gives them a sense of structure.

And yes, break everything down into small chunks of time, with movement breaks etc regularly.

OP, you should snap up that school place straight away! This is looking likely to go on for weeks and weeks. I can’t imagine you can actually do your work and look after a 5 year old. A recent study showed that the risk of young children passing on the virus is very low so it’s a small risk for massive reward.

@Enidblyton1

OP, you should snap up that school place straight away! This is looking likely to go on for weeks and weeks. I can’t imagine you can actually do your work and look after a 5 year old. A recent study showed that the risk of young children passing on the virus is very low so it’s a small risk for massive reward.

Not true. Children may not become ill with the virus but they certainly pass it on (often asymptomatically). That's the whole reason they closed schools in the first place and the whole reason the virus transmission rates rocketed up in September.

It's best to think 'little and often' (borrowed from my pregnancy days lol). DS is also five (reception year). There's no way he'll do more than 20 mins either. So I don't push him further than 15 mins. He has learned a lot more effectively this way, with fewer arguments as be both know it'll end soon.

I'm wfh FT so this works better for me too.