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So all the 'non essential moaners' what do you class as non essential

477 replies

HoppingOnSteppingStones · 13/01/2021 09:42

Because I've just been to tesco and brought a kettle. I've just had a bloke when I was stood in front to pay. Mumble about an 'essential kettle'

Did he know why I had to buy it. Did he plums!
It's not so I can go home and have a relaxing cuppa. Its so I can make formula for my baby. Because last night our kettle went bang!
We had to get hot water off the neighbour for this mornings bottle so I could then run to grab one.

What's essential to some isn't to others.

Yes I think there's prob a fine line but I wish people wouldn't judge

OP posts:
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WombatChocolate · 13/01/2021 12:39

When thinking about going out now, I ask myself if the trip can be avoided, or if the visit can be delayed to I only make 1 rather than 2 or more trips overall?

I'm looking to make fewer trips out and to have less contacts during the week.

This means, I would go to buy a kettle if I needed one, but if I was going to the supermarket tomorrow, I'd probably wait until then rather than go twice.

I wouldn't pop to the corner shop for a beer or a choc bar. I would plan my shopping to be 1 big shop and possibly 1 top-up. IM not saying everyone should do 1 big shop and 1 top up but everyone should look to see how they might reduce their trips out.

I think about my week ahead. If I want to walk with a friend, I will think about who that is and just meet 1 friend all week....not a different one every day.

I am aiming to reduce my contacts to 5 or less per week. I can do that because I WFH and have my shopping delivered in actuality.

Other people might have more contacts but most of us can reduce the no of people we encounter....and I include I those, every cashier in a shop, every person for a walk or chat, person at work, delivery driver etc. When you add it up, there can be loads. AND each of them has seem an equal number of people or more probably.

I aim to have several days where I either don't leave the house or only leave for a walk alone or with my household, so I don't have any contacts. For people living in households who have social contact and WFH this is very possible.

But lots of people are just nipping out all the time.....for some extra crisps for lunch that they fancy, for a pint of milk, for a dog walk with their neighbour. Our usual habits of regular and constant nipping put just need adjusting. No one needs to be socially isolated because those who live alone etc can have a bubble with one other household. They can still limit trips to the shops etc.

Isn't it about looking to do as little as possible rather than as much as possible??

4cats2kids · 13/01/2021 12:39

I don’t understand the problem with buying non essentials if you buy essentials at the same time in the same shop. A kettle for baby bottles is definitely essential though.

PaTCh64355 · 13/01/2021 12:39

@Shehasadiamondinthesky

Don't judge? I drove to work this morning and it was business as usual, road blocked with traffic like a normal day, loads of people milling about town in groups. Its wankers like these who are putting lives at risk. Non essential - garden centres, popping out for a paper and some crisps, wandering around with a group of people, why can't the kettle wait until you do your main shop? Surely you have a saucepan and a microwave. But fine if you're happy with all the other people I've seen today to add to the queues of ambulances outside hospitals go ahead. One of my NHS close colleagues just died of covid yesterday, he was a wonderful person with two small kids. But then ….your kettle...so important.
That is very sad and I am sorry.

But I think it is entirely reasonable to buy a kettle to safely make formula for a baby. Shops are open and people need to buy what they need to make this shit show a little bit easier .

I think the real rule breakers we need to judge are probably not posting on Mumsnet about a kettle.....

The government has done a number on us and rather than focus the criticism on them, they have made us turn on each other

RetailGail · 13/01/2021 12:39

garden centres are essential if you need outdoor or some animal related items

you can buy rock salt in tesco....but why increase the load on the staff there (as well as the queue) when you can get it from a much quieter garden centre?

silverstarfish · 13/01/2021 12:40

@herecomesthsun

We have dental check ups. We are planning to go, but have thought hard about whether they're essential. We have been shielding. However, there is a risk from dental emergencies as well, which might be more of a problem if things are left. One of my kids needs a regular fluoride treatment on their teeth and I don't want that to be missed out. And apparently dentists wear so much PPE and are so safety conscious that the risk is very small.

We went to a hospital appointment last week. That was essential, about a potentially sight-damaging condition.

That is it in terms of contacts in the past 2 or 3 weeks (shopping delivered)

My child also needs regular fluoride treatment for a condition they have and has so far missed two lots as here check ups aren’t deemed essential and you can be seen for emergency treatment only! No check ups have been allowed since March, and we are desperate - we normally have them every six months.
JovialNickname · 13/01/2021 12:40

I bought a plain flat white bedsheet the other day which I made the mistake of carrying not in a bag, because it had a little handle on it. Five, FIVE people snootily asked me if I felt it was really essential. I was having a good day so I was polite/ ignored, but I was very tempted to tell the next person that as I'd flooded my only bedsheet with period blood, yes I had decided to buy a new sheet, rather than lie in a sticky, stinking mess of menstrual blood clots. Only if was OK with them of course? I didn't though, I was a good girl.

Calmandmeasured1 · 13/01/2021 12:41

Sorry, I meant to address my post, not to the OP, but to the poster who thought it misleading that garden centres are open.
Ha ha. I just realised I even responded on the wrong thread entirely. 😂😂😂

LucyLane · 13/01/2021 12:41

Well obviously different things are essential to different people in different circumstances and at different times.
But, whilst obtaining their essentials, people should be trying to minimise contact as much as possible, staying at home as much as possible. Of course you can go and buy essentials- at your own risk, and at risk to others... but we should all be asking ourselves:
is it really essential? Or could I delay by a few weeks?
If it's essential, can I buy it online?
Or next best, can I buy it Click and Collect? Locally?
Can I go alone?

PicsInRed · 13/01/2021 12:41

These twats are the equivalent of The Simpsons' Level 7 vegan who didn't eat anything which casts a shadow.

Ignore them.

StrawberryLipstickStateOfMind · 13/01/2021 12:42

@RetailGail

nobody got anything to add to the fact retail staffs mental health is suffering with this attitude?

not to mention physical health as many staff now have covid or are isolating putting extra pressure on remaining staff?

Which is why when people are in a shop they should wear masks, respect people's space and treat retail staff with respect.

I don't know what the answer is. I don't like anyone being at higher risk because of the job they do. And I would personally have liked to see nhs, teachers, police, retail workers be top priority for the vaccine but it's not my decision, obviously.

On the flip side, I would actually love to be able to go to work. My mental health is crumbling and have found out today that my office is basically never going to be the same and it's totally unclear when we will even be back in the office. It was supposed to be April but it clearly won't be now and we don't even have a date. My mental health has suffered so badly because of the pandemic and I've felt all along that people's mental health hasn't been properly considered. I'm at the point where I just don't care what happens to me anymore because life doesn't feel worth living.

Gwenhwyfar · 13/01/2021 12:42

"Everyone needs a kettle, heating hot water in a pan and trying to get it into bottles half asleep increases likelihood you will burn yourself with booking water and end up in A&E to get it dressed. So it's essential."

I have no problem with people buying anything that's available in the shops during lockdown. However, plenty of people all around the world including highly developed countries don't use kettles, including parents.
Kettles are common where I live, but it's not something that almost everyone has like it is in the UK because people drink more coffee and some of them make tea with a pan or microwave.

Plussizejumpsuit · 13/01/2021 12:42

I think with all this talk about what is essential and what isn't we need to remember the purpose of the regulations which is about reducing opportunities for covid spread. So yes if you go to the shops every day for a bar of chocolate then that's probably not wise. But honestly if you're picking up whatever when you are in the supermarket it's not making a difference.

flowerpotsandrain · 13/01/2021 12:43

silverstarfish can you request a prescription for the extra high fluoride toothpaste?

Calmandmeasured1 · 13/01/2021 12:43

garden centres are essential if you need outdoor or some animal related items
Items for animal welfare are essential so you are allowed to go to wherever is permitted to be open for those items.

sofiaaaaaa · 13/01/2021 12:43

I think everything an open shop has on sale is fair game to purchase. If staff are going to judge people for buying “non-essential” food/clothing/household items, just remove them for sale.

I worked throughout first lockdown. I remember feeling a bit judged for not having full to the brim trolley every visit! Sometimes I just needed to buy lunch or a ready meal for dinner as I worked awkward shifts. I used to pick up random stuff to pad out my basket Grin

RetailGail · 13/01/2021 12:44

i am in retail, have worked all along through covid and not one person in our store would judge you for buying a kettle

we see so many proper non essential shoppers and listen to their unreasonable demands and moans.....that a kettle would not raise an eyebrow at all. unless you had no masker had it under your chin or demanded we shorten the queue. its obviously needed for safety reasons.....bleary eyed sleep deprived parent heating water needs safety
and speed.

its the customers themselves turning on each other

GabsAlot · 13/01/2021 12:44

of course a kettle is essential what was he buying

sofiaaaaaa · 13/01/2021 12:45

(And buy them of course!)

WombatChocolate · 13/01/2021 12:46

I disagree about reducing 'the load on Tesco staff' by buying all the things you can get there and going to multiple places instead. We should be reducing the no of places we go and reducing the no of contacts we have. That's the whole point.

I think we need to ask ourselves a bit more about if we really need things. Plants, DIY stuff, stuff for the garden....is it really a need or just something we fancy? Lots of things can wait in reality.

The question is how far people are prepared to give up the 'nice to haves' like the packet of crisps they get from the shop at 10pm at night, or the extra visit to their favourite supplier of a particular product, or the accepting eating more storecupboatd products so shopping can be reduced from every 3 days to every 5 or 6 days. I think lots of people are t in a mindset of asking 'which trips out can I cut out' at all.

middleager · 13/01/2021 12:46

Silver I have had to go private at the dentist. Not sure if that's an option?

ViciousJackdaw · 13/01/2021 12:46

Of course a kettle is essential, this country would come to a complete standstill if there was no hot tea.

whitechocolatehobnobs · 13/01/2021 12:47

If someone commented on something I was buying as being 'non essential' I'd tell them to fuck right off!

londongirl12 · 13/01/2021 12:47

It's all relative to each person. Buying a duvet might be an essential for someone if there's been an accident. I don't drink so alcohol isn't essential to me, but imagine the uproar if they closed the wine aisle!!

Gwenhwyfar · 13/01/2021 12:48

"On the flip side, I would actually love to be able to go to work. My mental health is crumbling and have found out today that my office is basically never going to be the same and it's totally unclear when we will even be back in the office. It was supposed to be April but it clearly won't be now and we don't even have a date. My mental health has suffered so badly because of the pandemic and I've felt all along that people's mental health hasn't been properly considered. I'm at the point where I just don't care what happens to me anymore because life doesn't feel worth living."

This is so awful. I find it hard not to resent people who are allowed to go to work. They don't have to go a week or more without speaking to someone not through a video screen and they don't spend 23 out of 24 hours among the same walls. (I am personally able to get out for longer on the weekend, but wouldn't in a stricter lockdown).
I've been given an 'extension' for my enforced wfh, and I expect it to be extended. I do think some employers will use this as an excuse to sell their premises, but not all so if you're not allowed back in April, maybe look for another job @StrawberryLipstickStateOfMind

GabsAlot · 13/01/2021 12:48

my sisters dental practise is open for anything i personally dont agree with it but theyre tying to make up for their losses i guess