How much home schooling is getting done in your household?

[Lovemusic33]

Hopping people will make me feel better. Dd has ASD and last lockdown we did barely any school work due to her refusing or self harming. This time I’m trying hard to get her to do more but I’m also trying to work (part time). She is 14 but due to being autistic she can’t just get on with work on her own, I have to sit and prompts her, reword things and calm her down when she doesn’t understand what’s being asked of her so it’s pretty draining. School are sending a lot of work and we just can’t keep up and I can’t keep her engaged long enough to complete more than a couple bits of work a day. Do we really have to do all of it?

How much are your kids doing each day? Are they completing all the work set for them?

Is it time for gin yet? 🤣

Ah OP I really feel for you, that must be so hard. Maybe email her school explaining what the situation is and ask it to be forwarded to her teachers. You could ask them for tips with how best help her and ask what the realistic expectations are. I think regular breaks are a must, 30-45 mins work at a time then a break of some sort.
Good luck!

That sounds like a difficult situation for you and your dd. My ds really struggled last year with home learning but is at a different school now and is getting on much better. He has asd and dyslexia. He likes routine and thing to be predictable. This time the home learning is much better than last time. I hope yku r dad's school is being supportive.

Thank you, we had a call from the school on Friday but was from a different teacher than we usually speak too, she was more harsh and said that they were being stricter this time and expect them to do all the work set (last time I was told not to worry too much), she said she would call again this Friday and wants to speak to dd 🤨, dd isn’t very verbal and will refuse to speak on the phone. Most of the work they are setting isn’t even appropriate for her and it’s not worth the stress of me forcing her to do it. Dd is doing one GCSE and a BTEC (maths and computing) though she will sit a entry level English exam. To me it’s more important to teach her life skills than educational skills as it’s unlikely she will live independently let alone hold down a job.

I think I’m just going to attempt the important bits and ignore the rest.

So far we've completed a good chunk (although last week it was punctuated by one day where both DD and I ended up having a cry with frustration at the dining room table!). That said, the reason we've completed today's already is because I took one look at the plague video they're supposed to watch today ("The plague, was a pandemic, that started in China and came to England carried by rats on boats...") and decided we'd go for a walk in the fresh air and then bake something for snack time instead. For goodness' sake people, read the room!

They're sending work daily so I don't know if this will be an ongoing topic this week (last week they did the Great Fire of London) but if it is we shall be ignoring all of it.

My theory is 4pm is gin time ;)

Oh, balls to them OP.

Your daughter is not NT, she doesn't have to do every piece.

Id just choose a couple of things a day, preferably get some maths and English in every other day.

Don't even look at the day before work, that you haven't completed, it will just stress you out.

Youre doing your best, dont let yourself or your dd get too stressed out.

It's sad the school is not being more supportive. I never push my ds to do everything. As you have said, there are more important things.

My DD 11 is too and the first lockdown was absolutely awful. In the end I just thought fuck it as I struggled relentlessly trying to work with her and do my full time job from home.

She is now in secondary school and they have pretty much a full timetable of teams calls so it's a very different situation. She is way more engaged and obviously more visible and accountable.

Sounds like her school is doing a crap job to me

My DS has autism. He is 12 (13 in two weeks)

He goes to school two days a week, and does no work at home. It is what it is.

The school is a specialist ASD school so i expected them to be a bit more understanding, dd is probably one of the more severe kids in the school (mainly due to her communication difficulties), last lockdown they were amazing and I just did my own thing with her, sent photos of things we had baked, art and craft activities, gardening etc.. and we only did a small amount of maths and English. She hates using the ipad to do work she hates work sheets and hates reading text.

Live lessons are going to be set up in the next couple days so she might find that easier (or maybe not).

In your situation I would just do what you can. I would ask to speak to the SENCO if the teacher is expecting the same from her than from children without her issues.

Are they not doing any online classes at all? Do you think she would engage if they did? Mine has ASD and she is way more productive on these sessions, I'm really surprised that your DD's school isn't doing something considering it's specialist status.

@jeaux90

Are they not doing any online classes at all? Do you think she would engage if they did? Mine has ASD and she is way more productive on these sessions, I'm really surprised that your DD's school isn't doing something considering it's specialist status.

No online lessons yet, they are apparently setting it up this week, at the moment they are using a app to send work and only one teacher is using videos. I am hoping she will engage better with online lessons.

I hope she does too. I hope they are organised enough to send a proper scheduled out as well so you can get some work done/schedule work stuff during that time.

To prevent any kind of "melt downs" with mine I made sure Teams (or whatever your school is using) was installed correctly etc . It's definitely worth spending some time making sure their bedroom/desk/tech situation is all ok if they are planning on doing more than a couple of sessions a day.

DS (11) is flat out from 9-3:30 with a 20 min break and 45 min lunch plus homework. It’s exhausting. But in your case, I’d sack it off and do the things you did in the first lockdown which sounds a lot more constructive.

Is there any way she can go in?

I honestly think this is an almost impossible ask for ASD kids.
The change of routine is so catastrophic. School is at school, not at home.

I think I would choose one thing per day to do. Something achieveable, and give her a simple list of things eg
one school task
make your bed
pack dishwasher
help make a shopping list.

Things which are practical and doable, that she can/will do and which will give her some sense of things done.

I communicated with our school by email so it’s in writing. Would be interested to know if the harsh teacher was prepared to put what she said verbally to you in writing.

Have you seen this thread? I don't think people who have not experienced this can really understand.

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/coronavirus/4125850-Can-we-have-an-ASD-additional-needs-support-thread

I am going to say that communicate with the school and explain that their expectations are too high, but more importantly concentrate on trying to make your daughter feel good about herself and her learning and try and follow her interests.

There are so many amazing resources like the Khan Academy etc. that she might be more engaged with (and might give you a break).

I made a lot of mistakes with my neurodiverse children last lockdown the main being to project my feelings about what I wanted them to do (the set schoolwork/not falling behind etc.) as opposed to what they needed to do (be calm, enjoy topics of their choosing, develop confidence and learn ways to navigate towards their interests etc.).

You are not alone!

Worryingly little but Y1 and YR children need so much supervision and support which doesn’t go well with working from home. I’m clinging on to the hope that these years will be the first ones back to school just like last year.