Am I being selfish sending my 2 year old to nursery?

[GirlAfraid32]

I keep seeing posts on here and on Facebook about how selfish it is if you send your toddler/child to nursery when you don’t necessarily have to.
I’m not working, my partner is a key worker but my mental health is the lowest it’s been for a long time. My family live 200 miles away and my in laws as lovely as they are, have enough on their plates.
My DS was getting on so well there before Christmas and he’s thriving socially and verbally. He only goes two days a week and we are being funded due to our financial situation.

Short answer - no you're not being selfish. Do it and maybe come off FB/SM for a while.

Not selfish at all. Childcare is available and it sounds like you're dong the best thing for you and your son.

You are NOT being selfish. You have made the right decision. Mental health matters and if this gives you breathing space to feel better then you need it.

No 💐 You must do what feels right for you. We don’t have the reserves of Lockdown1 and no amount of baths / self-care is helping anymore. If sending your DS to nursery will help you do it.

Definitely not selfish.

You are not being selfish! You are making a responsible decision that benefits everyone in your family and works with your circumstances. Look after yourself and don't feel guilty x

I'm in a similar boat, and have had friends support my decision and other friends treat me like a piece of shit. It's just made it clearer who my friends are.

Do it without hesitation.

It's right for your family.

I am sending my 2 yo to nursery although I'm not working. I don't feel selfish at all, although I'm not really sharing information about my decision with friends so I have no idea whether they're judging me or not. I stopped logging into FB months ago, and I don't know anyone on MN well enough for it to matter what their opinion is. It's early years education not childcare, so it's irrelevant whether you need it for childcare or not.

No you’re not selfish. I think it’s the new thing to moan about, it’ll be something else next week! I’m not sure why you’re being called selfish when three weeks ago no one mentioned it! No one mentioned it in June either!

I came off Facebook beginning of the pandemic, so glad I did. You do what works for you and your family op

I was called a murderer for sending my DS 2 to nursery today (via a social media platform) we all are trying to do what's best for our families. In my case I'm self employed, not entitled to the govenment schemes as started late 2018. My nursery is asking for 75% of fees if we take our DS out, no work for me means absolute zero pay.
We are all in this storm together, however some are in yachts and some in dinghys!
Op do what's right for you and your family

I am in almost the exact same boat. 3 year old went back yesterday and today. I've read a lot of posts today calling people like myself selfish but im past caring. He does amazing there and loves it. The alternative is I keep him in a flat with no garden for several months with his only activity being a freezing cold walk through a park.

Thanks everyone. I feel better for the responses x

I just went for a walk with my mum friend who has a 2 year old with my little boy in nursery. We are both feeling worried, but we agreed they were more likely to probably catch covid from the germy playground that we would take them to while OUT of nursery than to catch covid in nursery, and that made me feel better. Also - I have a job to do - I cannot do it with a 2 year old at home. He is happier there and more entertained

I’m still sending my DS in. I’d much rather he had some time with his friends and interacting with others, rather than dealing with a stressed mummy who’s trying to work and juggle everything.

No you are not selfish and please don’t feel bad. You sound like you have some very difficult circumstances. I hope you are feeling better soon x

I feel like large swathes of society were selfish in allowing Covid infections to reach a high enough point that people now have to question early childhood education and socialization. You’re doing a good thing for your toddler. But geez, the world needs to sort itself out...

I wouldn’t use a place unless it was the last resort for work purposes. Children have managed for generations without nurseries. The less in settings the safer for staff, children and families. We are supposed to be trying to lower the numbers for the benefit of all.

Don’t feel selfish, my 3yo DS has gone to nursery today. Me & DH are both working from home and have DD (6) here with us to entertain and homeschool at the same time. Lockdown 1 was almost unworkable as DS was (as is normal for a 3yo) in need of constant attention/supervision.

Our nursery are excellent, they’ve been very strict about keeping children in small bubbles (thankfully they have lots of space to enable this) and they haven’t had a single case of COVID since reopening on 1st June last year so I have every faith that they are maintaining strict protocols.