Lockdown effect on babies

[Wingingthis]

My baby was born in April and apart from a handful of times in the summer/early autumn she’s never met any of my wider family or friends. She has a 3yo sister and sees my mum & dad (who we’ve bubbled with).
It’s starting to look very highly likely that we’ll be living this way until her first birthday, are there any child development experts that can reassure me she won’t be effected by having little to no social interaction with people other than me, DH, her sister & grandparents? I realise we’re lucky in the sense she had a sister and we’ve been able to bubble up.
Thank you!

Anecdotal, but I noticed a lot of my friends who had a babies last autumn have all had early walkers.

I wondered if not being in cars or pushchairs/high chairs as much means they have had more opportunity for motor development.

@EugeniaGrace

Anecdotal, but I noticed a lot of my friends who had a babies last autumn have all had early walkers.

I wondered if not being in cars or pushchairs/high chairs as much means they have had more opportunity for motor development.

DS has been at nursery since September but he had a period of two week isolation when his bubble burst - it was very noticeable that in those two weeks at home 100% of the time that he want from tentatively taking a couple of steps on Day 1 to being able to walk very confidently by the end of it.

As long as you and those in your house are spending time interacting with and pkaying with your baby they will be fine. Secure relationships with caregivers, being safe , loved and interacted with is the best start for babies.
Parallel play can happen with siblings and older adults, get doen to their level and play, rediscover the world from a babies perspective and try not to worry, you will be doing great.

Parallel play with peers isn't a developmental stage for a six month old though! Even playing with parents for more than 10 minutes is a big deal!

I would be more concerned if I had a toddler but people worrying about tiny babies is OTT. Babies want their primary caregivers. If that attachment is secure then that is the main goal for a baby.

I hardly went to any baby groups with DD1 as we both disliked them. We have few friends with children the same age although we met them as much as we could. Otherwise starting childcare was the main time to start learning about other children.

She'll be absolutely fine as long as you and her dad are well and happy. We have no family near us and almost none of them saw either of our dc in their first year. I also didn't really do baby groups or classes as we live rurally and there aren't really any around here that aren't a long drive. Neither of mine really interacted with other children or anyone really outside our family until they started nursery at 1. They are fine. Babies don't need coffee dates. That's more for your sanity.

DD is nearly 11 months and luckily a very sociable baby who always loves it when we see other people. However, due to lockdown she is very attached to me and, to a lesser extent, her Dad as we’ve spent so much time together just as a family of four. Sometimes it feels like she thinks we’re one person! She’s not really seen any other babies really either and if we see one out and about she really stares, which is quite funny. I do worry that it’s going to make nursery tricky when I go back to work in April. But I also think that babies and young children are resilient and adaptable and she should be fine long term.

@yankeedoodledandee

she’s never met any of my wider family or friends.

I never really had wider family or friends when mine were babies. It didn't harm their development in any way. They went to school nursery at 3. One is now 19 and working FT and the other is 17, dropped of school (S6) in October but is going to Uni in September.

Was about to say this!

My dcs rarely see wider family. My mum is long dead and my dad and siblings live overseas. We have my DH's famiky, slightly nearer by, but not that year. This has been the case since they were born. They are absolutely fine . The most important people to them at that age, by far, are their parents and siblings.

I have a toddler who I do think is more shy due to lockdown, lack of play groups etc, but he is coming out of his shell more and more, as he goes to an amazing childminder two days per week now. He will start preschool next year too, which I'm sure will help too. If you're really concerned, you could look into child minders in your area? I was hesitant about it at first, but she is amazing.

Family*
Near*

I have a year old DS (12 months) and the only thing I really worry about is how he will be with strangers, but then I recall that around this time, DS1 (who is now 4) was actually worse than DS2 but is now very sociable. We recently visited family who we were able to bubble with, and at first DS2 cried, but then he stopped, and then he happily accepted food from his nana. I can't do anything about it, so I will hope for the best.

This has worried me too. I had my baby in April and although people are saying it doesn’t effect them, my baby absolutely loves seeing other babies.

We bubbled up with my friend and her two babies as they are all under one (can no longer do as in tier 4) and he would be so happy all day. He would come home and just be in the loveliest mood.

Now we’re stuck in not seeing anybody and he seems demonstrably ‘bored’. He gets niggly far more than when we were seeing people and going out. He cries when we go back into the house so I can definitely see some disadvantages.

I’m sure it won’t do any long term developmental damage but it is sad that he can’t be with other babies.

We bubbled up with my friend and her two babies as they are all under one (can no longer do as in tier 4)

I believe this is still allowed

You can form a support bubble with another household of any size if: your household includes a child who is under the age of one or was under that age on 2 December 2020

Support Bubble

You must not meet socially indoors with family or friends unless they are part of your household or support bubble.

Tier 4 rules

I think babies are the least affected to be honest. Mine was largely oblivious during the first lockdown and probably benefited from more time at home. She did settle very well into nursery at 18m. I worry more about the development loss of 18m onwards. It must have been very hard for people with toddlers who haven’t been able to attend nursery. My 3yo really suffered during proper lockdown and we were glad to get her back into nursery as soon as they opened in June. She has since thrived at school and really does need the stimulation of her peers.

@AaronPurr

Thank you so much for your reply.

You have given me a glimmer of happiness today!

[quote Lucy830]@AaronPurr

Thank you so much for your reply.

You have given me a glimmer of happiness today![/quote]
Happy to help. 😊 I can't stand the thought of people being isolated when it's not necessary. Enjoy your support bubble, and letting your little one see his friends.

My lockdown baby is seven months. I am not concerned about her development but it does make me sad that she hasn’t had the opportunity to develop a similar relationship to the one her brother and sister have with my parents. She does hear their voices and seems to recognise them on the phone but has only met them about four times.

I had my first DS in another country. We lived very rurally and he barely saw anyone except me, DH and our elderly neighbors for 18 months. No toddler groups, mixing with other DC, large events etc. He's now 15 and perfectly normal, sociable and well adjusted.

My experience of babies is that they LOVE other children--kids their own age, and older kids. They may not play "with" other kids much, but they are watching, watching all the time.

I do feel a bit concerned about the impact on babies who have basically no exposure to other children.

Remember those infamous (and very cruel) "monkey baby" experiments, where they traumatized baby monkeys by depriving them of mothers or mother substitutes? Less well known is that the experiments also covered situations where baby monkeys were allowed to stay with mothers but were deprived of "child monkey" peers/playmates. They also showed signs of abnormal development.
www.pbs.org/wgbh/aso/databank/entries/bhharl.html

Of course children don't need formalized "playgroups/nurseries" but not having even casual exposure to other children is a bit worrying, if it goes on for months and months (a month or two wouldn't bother me).

We know that the most important thing for child development is secure attachment to a consistent, emotionally engaged care giver. So it is possible that a year at home with you and all the attention you have been able to give her is more valuable than a ‘normal’ year.

I’ve got a 15 month old and not worried about it for a moment. They get most of their interaction from immediate family to start with anyway.

Mine’s developing right in line with how my eldest did (some things before, some things after, but on balance, very much the same), and has settled in to nursery really well after my mat leave and loves all the nursery staff and cuddles and high fives with the other kids.

Same. Baby born in May.
We live overseas so no family have visited, and we have had much stricter lockdown from the start so no friends visiting, no groups open, no restaurants or days out.

He’s developing fine physically as crawling and walking furniture already, it’s just he’s literally never had anyone except dh or I near him.

The biggest areas of delay we saw post lockdown of settings in our toddlers and preschoolers were in language and independence, but socially, they were secure and ready to separate and explore (for the most part).

Had my DD 7 months ago, so she has really always been in some sort of lockdown. She has seen one or two of my friends a couple of times and her granny about twice a month.

When she has been taken to a restaurant (about four times) she is happy and engaged with waitress etc when she has met new people she is interested not scared. So I can't see the lack of social interaction with other babies has had much if any impact.

I havent done baby groups as I am CEV and to be honest they also sound grim.

My midwife and health visitor said that all a baby needs really in its first year is care from parents and there wouldn't be any adverse affects. Whether this is true or not, it made me feel better.

I think a positive from all this is my husband has been working from home all the time and he has had an opportunity to build a really strong bond with her, that he might not have done otherwise.

I’ve a one year old as of two weeks time!

As far as I’ve read, developmentally, babies don’t need anyone but their parents until two years old. Our little chap is very sociable with those he has met and seems fine. I try to just focus on what is in my control- his day to day, his exposure to learning, safety, play, food, love, structure. I figure what with being new to the world he is pretty busy learning!

@Applesandpears23 exactly. Well put :)