WFH and schools / nursery closing help

[Northernmummy80]

Currently our nursery isn’t closed but I can see if coming in the horizon.

Thought a thread on how people coped / coping strategies / any hints and tips might be useful for lots of people.

So lovely people hit me with your advice!

Flex hours if possible. So in the first lockdown I split my part time hours over more days and primarily worked whilst DS 2yo was sleeping - so 5:30 in the morning, nap time, evening.

Meetings that I couldn't miss and Ds was awake - screen time. But there weren't many - people understood you had kids about!

We split our days so one parent worked in the morning and one in the afternoon. It meant we both got a chunk of time when we could solely focus on work. Obviously only helpful if both you and your partner are at home

I have an older primary school child. I won’t get involved in the homeschooling, I will get a private tutor if it becomes necessary. Luckily DS is a whizz online. My time is better spent ensuring my job is done well and kept secure, to pay the mortgage and buy the food. If he plays roblox for 5 hours then c’est la vie.

I did try teaching him last time. It took over an hour to look at one solitary maths topic and we only got to page 2. I just couldn’t manage to explain it in terms DS understood. Similarly all the SPAG stuff on split diagraphs, participles, etc. I have no clue.

The maths topic was successfully taught by a teacher in the autumn term in a tiny fraction of the time, with no tears involved.

We both WFH and took it in turns. One would parent for a day while the other worked and caught up in the evening if we needed to. DS is 3 and still naps during the day and yes, sometimes a film was put on or an iPad handed out.

Luckily both our work places are very understanding.

Should say, iPad and films were only used if I had a conference call and would sit in the same room as him and occasionally he would make a guest appearance (luckily we don’t do video conferencing!!)

Last time I was trying to work from home alone with an 8yo and 3yo, sodding nightmare!

We had a rough timetable, breaks and telly and activities scheduled. Youngest would do playdoh or magic sand for a while next to me while I worked. Scheduled walks at a time that was best for the kids, not for work, kept my phone on me while walking in case of urgent emails. Caught up with some work in the evenings.

Does depend on the child though, I know.

Mentally I only thought ahead to what was happening that day, otherwise the size of the challenge and monotony would freak me out.

Do whatever it takes to get you both through the day. If it means ridiculous amounts of screen time then so be it. Now is not the time to beat yourself up about such things.

I've found colleagues etc very understanding. Everyone is in a similar situation. So if I miss a non-essential meeting there's no hard time, equally I have been willing to attend meetings outside my normal working pattern - so flexibility goes both ways.

I worked early mornings and late nights, but that was summer with lighter morning and evenings, and I was exhausted, also I took laptop outside so DD was playing in garden most of day and tired out. Will be harder in cold dark days to do this.
Screen time is inevitable...

I had to WFH 9-5.30 and DH wasn't home, so my 2 yo just watched tv all day with lots of snacks. It was horrendous, but you get through it!

If it closes again I'll be finding friends and relatives to help with childcare.

If there are two of you, do as much as you can to stagger working hours. It means that you have no downtime really but it helps.

If you have the kind of job/employer where you can block out time in calendars as “with children but have phone on” do it, and do it for the whole week at the start of the week rather than try to fit it round whatever meetings you end up with, as much as is possible.

Otherwise: a lot of emails on phone while sitting with children or following them round the house. Lower expectations massively. And on the days when it feels like you’re just miserably failing at everything, remind yourself that there is no conceivable way on Earth to do it well. You are doing fine just by getting through it.

I am in tier 4 and work in a nursery and I don,t see it closing. Enven in lockdown it was open for the key worker and vulnarable children.

Use all 24 hours of the day and all seven days of the week to best effect. Some work will be time specific and some won’t. If you have to keep to appointment and meeting times, move the other things you need to do in a day around. Basically design it from scratch as if you have no knowledge of day/night, sleep/awake, weekday/weekend, or set eating times. If you get time to relax at 5am on a Tuesday, take it. If you get time to work at 1am on a Sunday, take it. If you can work and be mobile, do it (eg working on your phone in the park or laptop on the floor next to the train tracks). If you need to have a big meal at 10.30am and toast for dinner, do that. If you don’t have time to cook, put all the food groups on a plate, lay a blanket on the floor, call it a picnic. If you have people who can support you remotely, take them up on that (eg prop auntie or grandad up on a video chat in the corner and let them read a story/be shown every element of the game)

If you can work two and a half hours a day whenever they are asleep, one hour a day somehow mobile, half an hour a day with a video chat, and use two half hour TV programmes a day you’ve got 35 hours covered over the week. Of course no one can flex to that extent to use them all but it hopefully gives ideas.

When they are awake, you can do the schooling needed. The problem comes of course when they are expected in online groups or lessons at specific times and you are expected in meetings or to do specific hours, we had a lot of that over the last lockdown. Some of my DC were expected to upload progress hourly and some had mountains of stuff to get through and too young to self manage.

The whole thing is shit and I’m off to open the whisky just thinking about doing it again

It’s not always easy but try and make some time for your own MH too. Makes you more resilient and able to face the day. I use a SAD lamp each morning and try and get out for a walk and take DS with me. Try and get enough sleep and cut down on alcohol (I’m guilty of not doing the last two though!)

Worked FT from home with 7 & 2 yo. Keyworker DH. The thought of doing it again is making me ill tbh but I know I will cope. What’s the choice? Lose job and home.

Manage your expectations in terms of home schooling. There is no time to cajole DC into doing work they don’t want to so let them choose their own priorities. Also let the teachers mark it, you don’t need to scrutinise it before it’s handed in, even if it’s all wrong. The teachers will feed back.

Kids will not implode if you let them watch an inordinate amount of TV. I found a task and reward system worked well for schoolwork.

Don’t look at social media. Seeing other people living the life of Riley while you are just about surviving is soul destroying and will make you hate your friends.

Get up early and work before they are up. This will be so much harder now it’s dark 😥

If your colleagues offer to help then let them. I am a control freak by nature but I’ve needed to let it go a bit.

If you are in a ‘customer’ focused role then set boundaries as to when you are at work. I am a lecturer and I started off in March answering emails 24/7 & soon I was receiving a much higher volume of emails/requests for student support out of hours. I might be ok to do a quick admin task last thing at night but I am no state to offer students feedback. This time I will be composing emails at midnight but sending them in office hours!

Good luck and take it day by day. It won’t be forever.

We did half and half each day of working away in the home office vs “working” while trying to do childcare.
Friends did two hours “on” two hours “off” from 8-8 so each gets 6hrs to work.

@june2007 sorry I should have added we aren’t key workers so we wouldn’t be able to send kids to nursery. Although ours closed for key workers eventually as it wasn’t financially viable. I’m hoping they stay open 🤞🤞

Thanks everyone so far. We have got this!! Plan of action if it did happen will be to make a timetable plan, buy lots of snacks and charge up all electronic devices!

Nurseries are staying open regardless

@Looneytune253 ohhhh do you know this for sure?? How do you know? I would love if this is confirmed 🤞🤞

@ChanklyBore

Use all 24 hours of the day and all seven days of the week to best effect. Some work will be time specific and some won’t. If you have to keep to appointment and meeting times, move the other things you need to do in a day around. Basically design it from scratch as if you have no knowledge of day/night, sleep/awake, weekday/weekend, or set eating times. If you get time to relax at 5am on a Tuesday, take it. If you get time to work at 1am on a Sunday, take it. If you can work and be mobile, do it (eg working on your phone in the park or laptop on the floor next to the train tracks). If you need to have a big meal at 10.30am and toast for dinner, do that. If you don’t have time to cook, put all the food groups on a plate, lay a blanket on the floor, call it a picnic. If you have people who can support you remotely, take them up on that (eg prop auntie or grandad up on a video chat in the corner and let them read a story/be shown every element of the game)

If you can work two and a half hours a day whenever they are asleep, one hour a day somehow mobile, half an hour a day with a video chat, and use two half hour TV programmes a day you’ve got 35 hours covered over the week. Of course no one can flex to that extent to use them all but it hopefully gives ideas.

When they are awake, you can do the schooling needed. The problem comes of course when they are expected in online groups or lessons at specific times and you are expected in meetings or to do specific hours, we had a lot of that over the last lockdown. Some of my DC were expected to upload progress hourly and some had mountains of stuff to get through and too young to self manage.

The whole thing is shit and I’m off to open the whisky just thinking about doing it again

This sounds fucking horrendous

Last time round we had a 3/4yo and 1 year old and it was horrendous, nearly broke us and our marriage suffered. What we did was 2 hour slots of work/childcare. We realised early on it was unsafe to try and have us both working at the same time. Exercise in the morning was key to not having the 3yo bouncing off the walls. Fortunately the baby was a reliable napper but they were at such different stages it was horrendous. The older one for lonely and pissed off with the baby and the baby was in the kamikaze phase of life of climbing, eating small things etc We had a period of isolation over autumn so had to do home schooling but the younger one was slightly easier as she was no longer trying to kill herself 100 times a day.

I realised that over lockdown I was either working or doing childcare. I don’t think I ever had time for tv during the week. It was relentless really.

@Northernmummy80 yes it's in the guidance. Only difference being if it's a school nursery within one of the closure areas and they can decide for themselves

greendress789 - welcome to my world

My nursery phones yesterday afternoon to say they will close until Feb due to staff sickness and not enough staff to open safely. Firstly I hope they're all okay, but working from home with a 2 year old will be struggle. I'm grateful ill be paid but I think it might be easier to take time off. I worked from home with him during the first lockdown, honestly don't think i can do it again.