Weddings next year May 2021

[Starsuns]

Afternoon MN,
I am really hoping to get some opinions here about my wedding (I'm aware it's a first world problem). Can you see a 100 plus guest count in May 2021 going ahead?
Because I don't and I really don't want it to go ahead. We've already cancelled twice and the stress is ridiculous.
My friends keeping saying it's something to look forward to but I secretly hate them mentioning it and wish they wouldn't. Also friends are understandably asking what's the plan, so it go ahead in May? I don't know what to say.
I really really don't want to have it next year. Feel like I'm in limbo.
Can I ask if you think it'll happen? I know there is a vaccine etc but I see the next 12 months with more lock downs and tiers, working from home and minimal if any socialising.

Thanks in advance

No, I don’t think there’s any chance of 100 people plus in May. Realistically I don’t think you’ll be allowed more than 50... 30 could happen.

We did the same, original wedding last May, postponed once, then cancelled and did a small wedding instead. We also want a family so we’re now focusing on that, and we’ll plan the bigger celebration when this is all over and it fits in with our family. People are excited for it but they all know that we’re already married, so it won’t be the original day that we planned anyway - it’s not the end of the world when it takes place, so we’ll assess at a reasonable point whether we go ahead while I’m pregnant/delay til afterwards etc if those things come to pass.

There’s little control to be had here, which I struggled with initially - but realistically we let go of that original wedding when we got legally married this summer, and we can wait until it’s safe and everyone is happy to celebrate it with us - but I don’t want to risk not having a family to do that ASAP. The family is more important to us then the second wedding being imminent.

It's really unlikely that a 100 guest wedding can go ahead in the first half of next year. It would be nice if it could but I'm in a tier 4 area and things have never been this bad. Normality seems a long way away.

I'm glad you did manage to get married. That is the important bit but I fully understand why you also want a proper celebration.

If it was me I think I'd go ahead and start trying for a baby. You don't want to endlessly be putting off the next steps in your life together without any certainty or when things will be better.

You can organise your party for when restrictions finally lift. It could be an anniversary party it could be a Christening - perhaps it could be for both but I'm sure you'll be able to have a lovely time when it does go ahead.

Of the 100 people closest to you, it is very unlikely anyone will not want to attend a wedding that isn't legally binding. Especially given the circumstances. Even before covid plenty of people did the legal bit separately to the celebration so ignore that kind of thinking.

All you can do for now is hold on, OP and tell people when they ask that you're having to wait and see. Again, most people are pretty understanding that you're in a tough situation.

TTC is a bit of a lottery, but could you just start? Come May you won't be very pregnant if it happens immediately for you, or you can take a pause if you need go rearrange the date. (I'm biased here... this is what I did and i should have a 6 month old at my wedding!)

I can't imagine after the year we've had our friends and family would be so picky to think it's pointless or an anticlimax....jeez

As others have said, I’d find it very odd going to a big white wedding when the couple were already married at least a year before

Also, the hospitality industry adds ££££ on at the mention of the word ‘wedding’ so an anniversary party would likely be much less expensive, thus less of a stress

Even if it was technically ‘allowed’ I suspect a lot of people would think twice about attending such a large group in May

I really can't see it being an option by May, sorry. Many people will still no have been vaccinated.

Can you put it back? I am sorry but I just can’t see weddings with 100+ guests in May 21, the vaccine is taking a while to roll out. Weddings will probably go ahead, but with a much smaller number of guests, would you be happy to reduce your guest list? Keeping my fingers crossed for you OP.

Thanks for the kind and supportive responses everyone

I'm actually shocked at the bitchy responses. I didn't come on here to be judged for wanting a wedding we originally planned .

I was taken ill in April and was in hospital most of May 2020 and there on what would have been our wedding day. After months of getting better we thought the one positive thing in 2020 would be to legally marry. So sod anyone who says I'm not allowed my wedding with friends and family! We're celebrating me getting better too.
My question was regarding normality in May 2021 and I needed objective responses so I can start to reorganize and cancel come Jan/Feb.
Everyone knows we're married and were so happy for us...if anyone is so upset by it they don't have to come to our wedding besides we have my wedding dress and suits etc.
I can't imagine hotels being open and operating let alone venues or our church.

I'm not upset at all about cancelling again, in fact the wedding is a massive stress.
I don't think life will be normal for quite a while and when we are allowed weddings and we are safe I doubt anyone will bat an eyelid if the couple have legally married previously.

Again why are people coming on here to get their knickers a twist about me having my original wedding?

@Starsuns because its mums net and there are some judgy bitches out there.
I honestly don't know the answer to your original question, out weddingnis planned for June 2021 with approx 250 guests.
Its all booked and paid for and postponed from June 2020.
Whatever happens, we will get married in June, however if we have to postpone the party - then like you, we will. I can't postpone the whole wedding again as my mum has since been diagnosed with cancer - its unlikely she will be here this time next year and has said she would like to see us married come what may.

I think all we can do is keep our fingers crossed xxx

OP don't listen to the naysayers.

If I was invited to a postponed wedding reception I'd be delighted that firstly you'd been sensible and gone ahead with the wedding when you could, and secondly to have an opportunity to be with a group of friends and family celebrating a marriage seems like a great big two fingers up to all the horrible things that have happened this year.