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Covid

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Original poster

Bloody XH is having to self isolate

29 replies

MintyCedric · 21/12/2020 21:35

I know it's not his fault but it's just another pile of shit I don't need right now.

He was in contact with someone on Friday who has since become symptomatic and tested positive, he's being tested tomorrow.

DD (16) can't go to him tomorrow as planned which is my session wrapping her presents somewhat buggered, but more significantly I'm not sure if she should see him as planned on Boxing Day.

As far as I can tell he should isolate for 10 days even if he gets a negative test result, which would mean she can't see him until next Tuesday.

I'm overweight and asthmatic, and caring for my parents who are in their eighties, and in my dad's case on end of life care with advanced frailty.

I'm absolutely terrified of her going round there before the 10 days is up but she's not happy about not seeing him until then, even though their relationship is fairly fraught and she's not a fan of his partner.

WWYD?

OP posts:

lavenderlou · 21/12/2020 21:38

It's absolutely clear that she can't go round there if he's self-isolating. She should make plans with him for next Tuesday onwards.

SadSecretSanta · 21/12/2020 21:40

At 16, I’m sure she’s old enough to be told not to enter a room for a while while you wrap stuff.
I’d keep her away from your dh for ten days, for your own peace of mind.

AnneLovesGilbert · 21/12/2020 21:40

Tell her to watch a film or go for a walk while you wrap presents. She obviously can’t see him while he’s isolating. It’s a shame but as you say, it’s not like he did it on purpose and he’s way more inconvenienced than you are.

Original poster

MintyCedric · 21/12/2020 21:46

Yeah I know the present wrapping thing is really a complete non issue. It was just a little something I was looking forward to in a year that has been an unmitigated shitshow on a personal level as well as global one.

IANU about Boxing Day though, am I? I'm not normally so neurotic, and part of me thinks it'll be over a week by then, but with the additional risk factors it seems like tempting fate.

OP posts:

NatMoz · 21/12/2020 21:48

Even before the isolation period for Covid is considered, he can only visit on Christmas Day or vice versa not Boxing Day. Come on. You and DD know this. That's assuming you're not in tier 4

The fact he is isolating is another massive big fat no.

Original poster

MintyCedric · 21/12/2020 22:02

@NatMoz children under 18 with separated/divorced parents are exempt from the usual rules even in Tier 4 and between Tiers. We are currently in Tier 2 (although I suspect that will change in the next week or so).

She already not going to be seeing him from 3rd -18th January as she has exams and his domestic set up isn't conducive with her studying.

OP posts:

Original poster

MintyCedric · 21/12/2020 22:03

I don't want her seeing him until next Tuesday btw...I'm not trying to find loopholes.

OP posts:

dementedpixie · 21/12/2020 22:06

He has to isolate for 10 days regardless of a negative test. No she can't go and see him until his 10 days are up

MajesticWhine · 21/12/2020 22:13

I'm not totally sure what you are asking. No you should not send her there. But it seems you already agree with that.
Commiserations, but there's nothing you can do about this.

Covidrelapse · 21/12/2020 22:19

She absolutely can’t go there. I’d be telling her if she does go she needs to stay for 10 days to isolate herself and not bring anything back to you.

Audreyseyebrows · 21/12/2020 22:22

Nope. I would be completely straight with her, by going she is putting you and your parents at risk.

Original poster

MintyCedric · 21/12/2020 22:28

Yeah I know. He won't be happy and she was surprisingly upset, which is horrible.

He and his partner started fostering last year and she's felt quite pushed out. They had a new child arrive last week and I think the fact they'll be spending Xmas as a cosy threesome has rattled her a bit.

OP posts:

alreadytaken · 21/12/2020 22:42

She's not a baby, she's old enough to understand she cant go and ExH and his partner should also be saying that.

AnneLovesGilbert · 21/12/2020 23:04

OP, in the nicest possible way, that’s all completely irrelevant. They can FaceTime whenever they like, like the rest of the country where family can’t be together. You seem to be suggesting he’s done this on purpose to piss you or your daughter off. He’s now stuck indoors for the next week and a half. It’s far worse for him.

Original poster

MintyCedric · 21/12/2020 23:20

You seem to be suggesting he’s done this on purpose to piss you or your daughter off

I know the title seems like that but I really don't blame anyone...it's just been an exceptionally crappy year and that curve ball at this stage in proceedings was frankly a bit of a fucker!

DD is okay and I'll message him tomorrow to clarify as I think he's under the impression that if he gets a negative test result Boxing Day is still a goer.

OP posts:

Original poster

MintyCedric · 21/12/2020 23:22

@alreadytaken

Of course she's not a baby, but she's allowed to have feelings

OP posts:

MrsHuntGeneNotJeremyObviously · 21/12/2020 23:29

If he has a negative test result why can't he see her?

Covidrelapse · 21/12/2020 23:30

@MrsHuntGeneNotJeremyObviously you still need to isolate the full 10 days regardless of negative tests the negative test only shows you’re negative when the test is taken. 24 hours later it could be positive even if you’ve not been anywhere.

dementedpixie · 21/12/2020 23:56

@MrsHuntGeneNotJeremyObviously

If he has a negative test result why can't he see her?

A negative test only releases you from quarantine if you were the one with symptoms and had not had contact with a positive case. As he had contact he must remain in isolation until his 10 days are up

Marty13 · 22/12/2020 01:28

Out of curiosity... What's the point of testing if you have to isolate anyway ?

StatisticalSense · 22/12/2020 02:12

@Marty13
You are not meant to test as a contact unless you develop symptoms. Unfortunately large swathes of people believe they are special and think that they can do what they want.

theThreeofWeevils · 22/12/2020 06:49

@Marty13

Out of curiosity... What's the point of testing if you have to isolate anyway ?

Your household do not have to isolate unless you test positive.

theThreeofWeevils · 22/12/2020 06:50

...'test positive or develop symptoms', that should have said.

MRex · 22/12/2020 07:04

Surely she could drop a present at the door and stand well back with you to have a wave? Then after that FaceTime. It can make a big difference emotionally to see someone in person even if you can't hug or get near each other. If we were in the same tier as my family I'd love to be able to drop off their gifts.

merlotormalbec · 22/12/2020 07:33

He shouldn't be getting a test if he doesn't have symptoms and it's pointless because false negatives happen all the time. Your daughters 16 you can wrap presents with her there in another room

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